Car seating - who should sit where?

LuncheonInThePark · 2025-10-28T14:25:15+00:00

I already know I probably am being petty here, but interested in thoughts so it'll maybe stop irritating me (and yes, I know there are more important things to be bothered over!) Saw a Facebook post saying 'If the husband is driving, who should sit in the front - the wife or the mother'. Now, I ALWAYS offer my MIL in the front seat, but she always declines and sits with our 11 year old DD. FIL just automatically goes in the front. If it was him by himself without MIL, I would of course offer (if I was given the chance), but he's straight in there. I think the reason it bothers me is it comes across as though men in the front, while me, MIL and DD - the women - should be in the back. How are the car seating dynamics in your family?

solvendie · 31/10/2025 20:50

I would be driving and whoever found it difficult to get in or out of a car, or second choice have very long legs would be in the passenger seat

venusandmars · 31/10/2025 20:45

SquigglePigs · 28/10/2025 14:36

Vast majority of the time I'm driving but if not then I have the other front seat.

I get horribly car sick and both my parents and in-laws kindly sit in the back so I don't have to. Even in their own cars!

Plus DD is far more excited having a grandparent sit with her than a parent and they are all happy to accommodate that!

I pull the car-sick card every time.

Gwenhwyfar · 31/10/2025 20:24

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 30/10/2025 19:33

The head of the household/the host or even just an adult who lives there.

I would never, as a guest, seat myself at the head of someone else's table unless I had to. It feels very disrespectful.

I once went to the toilet as friends were serving dinner, came back and everyone was already seated, and the only place left was at the head. I sat down gingerly, feeling very awkward and apologised.

Everyone, including me, laughed at how silly I was being. They obviously hadn't given it the slightest thought and I do know it's very outdated but it's how I am. I'm an old fashioned and traditional person.

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It's not that it's outdated, but that it's very formal. It matters for important meetings, not so much for dinner with friends.

Gwenhwyfar · 31/10/2025 20:22

"I still make DS sit in the back though who is also 6ft 🤔"

Why?

Alpacajigsaw · 31/10/2025 11:36

I’d always sit in the front of my own family car.

Dramatic · 31/10/2025 11:36

BarnacleBeasley · 31/10/2025 10:47

I know the answer to this! My four year old explained it to us this morning. I am the boss of our house, because I am a tiny bit taller than DP. So as with taking the front seat of the car, the tallest person is the boss.

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Damn, I've been relegated to 5th now then, 3 of our 4 children are taller than me 😢

notacooldad · 31/10/2025 11:34

When ds is driving both dh and ds suggest I sit in the front. However I opt for the back and sit behind ds. Dh is tall so the seat gets pushed all the way back and I would have no room. If he was in the back Dh would have no room.

This is on longer journeys so we all can be comfortable. If we are going local, who care who sits where!

Dramatic · 31/10/2025 11:34

I almost always drive because I get car sick otherwise, even in the front. I'd usually say parents would go in the front and DH would go in the back.

TheignT · 31/10/2025 11:33

In my family the people who get travel sick get priority, getting awkward as it used to be two so one could drive and the other be front seat passenger but now we have one in the new generation.

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 31/10/2025 11:32

Talipesmum · 31/10/2025 11:31

So do you mean you think the man is the “head of the household”? Really?

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Why on Earth would you draw that conclusion from what I said?

Iris2020 · 31/10/2025 11:32

ReignOfError · 28/10/2025 15:22

I’m violently travel sick if I sit in the rear seats, so everyone encourages me into the front.

Same. I can barely last 2 minutes in the back without throwing up.

Talipesmum · 31/10/2025 11:31

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 31/10/2025 11:29

Well most families in 2025 feel this way but as I said, it's just how I am and I do know it's silly and outdated.

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So do you mean you think the man is the “head of the household”? Really?

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 31/10/2025 11:30

Papergirl1968 · 31/10/2025 11:28

I haven’t read all the replies but I was recently surprised and a bit horrified that my single friend makes her dad, in his 80s and has some back pain and mobility issues, sit in the back of their small car so her dog can have the front seat…because pup likes the view from the front.

Well that's just disgusting.

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 31/10/2025 11:29

Parker231 · 31/10/2025 11:18

We don’t have a head of the table - they are just seats and everyone can sit where they like.

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Well most families in 2025 feel this way but as I said, it's just how I am and I do know it's silly and outdated.

Papergirl1968 · 31/10/2025 11:28

I haven’t read all the replies but I was recently surprised and a bit horrified that my single friend makes her dad, in his 80s and has some back pain and mobility issues, sit in the back of their small car so her dog can have the front seat…because pup likes the view from the front.

Parker231 · 31/10/2025 11:18

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 30/10/2025 19:33

The head of the household/the host or even just an adult who lives there.

I would never, as a guest, seat myself at the head of someone else's table unless I had to. It feels very disrespectful.

I once went to the toilet as friends were serving dinner, came back and everyone was already seated, and the only place left was at the head. I sat down gingerly, feeling very awkward and apologised.

Everyone, including me, laughed at how silly I was being. They obviously hadn't given it the slightest thought and I do know it's very outdated but it's how I am. I'm an old fashioned and traditional person.

Show quote history

We don’t have a head of the table - they are just seats and everyone can sit where they like.

BarnacleBeasley · 31/10/2025 10:47

Indianajet · 30/10/2025 21:05

But who is 'head of the household '?

I know the answer to this! My four year old explained it to us this morning. I am the boss of our house, because I am a tiny bit taller than DP. So as with taking the front seat of the car, the tallest person is the boss.

Indianajet · 30/10/2025 21:05

But who is 'head of the household '?

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 30/10/2025 19:33

Indianajet · 28/10/2025 16:43

Who sits at the head of the table?

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The head of the household/the host or even just an adult who lives there.

I would never, as a guest, seat myself at the head of someone else's table unless I had to. It feels very disrespectful.

I once went to the toilet as friends were serving dinner, came back and everyone was already seated, and the only place left was at the head. I sat down gingerly, feeling very awkward and apologised.

Everyone, including me, laughed at how silly I was being. They obviously hadn't given it the slightest thought and I do know it's very outdated but it's how I am. I'm an old fashioned and traditional person.

Cantheowneroftheredcorsapleasemovetheircar · 30/10/2025 19:25

laura246810 · 29/10/2025 18:47

Tallest people sit in the front. Its not a sex/ age thing.

OP has already said that her FIL is the same height as her

laura246810 · 29/10/2025 18:47

Tallest people sit in the front. Its not a sex/ age thing.

Secretdestroyers · 29/10/2025 08:30

Tallest passenger in the front, unless someone needs it for mobility/health reasons.

PiccadillyPurple · 29/10/2025 08:28

MIL gets the front seat because she has limited mobility. I share the back seat with her walker as it's too big for the boot of our little car.

My parents go in the back because they have dementia but no mobility issues, and they're safer where they can't distract the driver, though getting their seatbelts fastened can be something of a saga.

Thunderdcc · 29/10/2025 08:25

Firstly anyone who gets car sick, secondly whoever has the longest legs 😊

Ohwhatfuckeryitistoride · 29/10/2025 08:24

Hiver · 28/10/2025 14:34

It’s about size here

so son and dh upfront

why…. Both have much longer legs!

Edited

This. And my mum used to get the front seat because she got car sick.