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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this PDA is inappropriate

60 replies

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 10:23

I'm on a train with my 10 year old son and there is a couple across from us. We are in a row across one side of the carriage, facing the couple who are on the opposite side (in the style of the Tube but narrower so about 1.5 metres away). There is one other girl on their row on her phone. Just giving context for how close they are, or far, depending on your perspective.

Anyway, they keep kissing with lots of giggling and sloppy sound effects. They aren't properly snogging but we can hear the long slurpy sounds and the muffled laughter, even when we look away. They are around 30 and are speaking Spanish, so don't know how much English they speak, but my son said to me quietly 'that's disgusting' and I said 'I know' in response. Honestly it was so sloppy and it's one of my least favourite sounds.

The couple continued and I instinctively looked up without thinking and the man had his eyes open and was looking in our direction with a smile on his face, mid slurp. They kissed a few times more and my son sort of winced. Look, I think it's great they are in love and everything, I really do. I'm not a prude. But I think it's just a bit yuck to be creating such a performance of kissing right in front of a child. Am I being very naive here? Is this something that other people would be ok with? When I felt like they were doing to deliberately piss us off I felt really annoyed. If I was on my own I wouldn't care but my son feels uncomfortable and for reason that's making me really peeved!

Is it just me?

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Chinsupmeloves · 30/10/2025 18:00

Yuk no, time and place for this. Xx

MyLimeGuide · 28/10/2025 16:43

They could be doing a lot worse OP!

OwlBeThere · 28/10/2025 16:40

Elfie111 · 28/10/2025 13:13

I’m with you on that one. That is vile in front of a child from the couple on the train. Makes me happy that in Dubai you’re not permitted to do any of that in public and they take it quite seriously. The train is not an extension of their bedroom. Weirdos. You would also think they would refrain from that as soon as they saw your little boy.

Vile from them.

♥️

Yeah, I’d much rather live in a place gay people are stoned to death than have to deal with a bit of PDA on a train.

OwlBeThere · 28/10/2025 16:34

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:19

Corners of mouth upturned, face at an angle to his gf. Can't believe I wrote that!

😂😂😂

AzurePanda · 28/10/2025 15:07

Yuck, what a horrid thing to inflict on people around you.

ApplebyArrows · 28/10/2025 15:00

Weird, but unlikely to cause your child irreparable harm.

Rocknrollstar · 28/10/2025 14:17

Wasn’t anyone on here ever young and in love and on the tube?

DontbesorrybeGiles · 28/10/2025 13:28

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:21

Yes!

Fwiw, I would also find it gross and inconsiderate. Especially the fact that they were around 30 rather than 15. That’s quite embarrassing.

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:21

DontbesorrybeGiles · 28/10/2025 13:20

Sounds like an Italian train - the local/regional ones often look like that, split level with a mix of rear-, forward-, and side-facing seats. It’s not that weird.

Yes!

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DontbesorrybeGiles · 28/10/2025 13:20

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 13:13

This is the weirdest sounding train I've ever heard of 🤷‍♀️

Next time you know, just move

Sounds like an Italian train - the local/regional ones often look like that, split level with a mix of rear-, forward-, and side-facing seats. It’s not that weird.

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:19

OwlBeThere · 28/10/2025 13:18

How can he smile at you AND be mid-slurp? How big is his mouth? Is he a succubus masquerading as a man?

Corners of mouth upturned, face at an angle to his gf. Can't believe I wrote that!

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Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:18

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 13:16

Ah so now the old "not in the UK" too

Maybe it's just more socially acceptable then and you were being offensive to expect different

Hardly. I've lived here for almost a decade.

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OwlBeThere · 28/10/2025 13:18

How can he smile at you AND be mid-slurp? How big is his mouth? Is he a succubus masquerading as a man?

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 13:16

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:14

I'm not in the UK so I haven't seen many like this myself. Next time I will.

Ah so now the old "not in the UK" too

Maybe it's just more socially acceptable then and you were being offensive to expect different

whimbrelcalling · 28/10/2025 13:14

No it’s not appropriate, but I think some couples are exhibitionist and enjoy getting a reaction. I’m reminded of a couple on a train in Italy years ago who were all over each other, then disappeared to the toilet together, and came back ten minutes later and lit up an obviously post-coital fag!

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:14

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 13:13

This is the weirdest sounding train I've ever heard of 🤷‍♀️

Next time you know, just move

I'm not in the UK so I haven't seen many like this myself. Next time I will.

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Elfie111 · 28/10/2025 13:13

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 10:44

Yes of course I am but not on this level, not the constant semi snogging. There is a level of hugs and kisses that you do in front of your kids and a type you don't. The verging on foreplay types of kisses are different to what our kids see. We have a cuddle and a peck but hopefully my kids don't get the sense that I want to take dhs clothes off. My stop is 3 mins away!

I’m with you on that one. That is vile in front of a child from the couple on the train. Makes me happy that in Dubai you’re not permitted to do any of that in public and they take it quite seriously. The train is not an extension of their bedroom. Weirdos. You would also think they would refrain from that as soon as they saw your little boy.

Vile from them.

♥️

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 13:13

This is the weirdest sounding train I've ever heard of 🤷‍♀️

Next time you know, just move

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:11

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 13:07

You said the carriage was nearly empty

It's like you keep changing the narrative tbh

You're so worried about your son being uncomfortable but couldn't be arsed to move

Honestly I'm not going to engage with you anymore. I have tried to describe the layout of the train. It was a split level train so had some upstairs and some Downstairs, there were areas within the train but not in the standard format of normal trains. I'm not trying to change the narrative, I was on a train in an area which I called a carriage because it was separate from the rest of the bit of the train we were in, and that area was almost empty, but the rest of the bit of the train that I had access to/could see, was full. I'm not that bored to make all this up. Yes I should have tried harder to move.

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Fiftyandme · 28/10/2025 13:10

I couldn’t waste energy fussing over this

CoffeeCantata · 28/10/2025 13:10

Eeeeeeuuuuwwww….

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:08

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 12:59

Honestly, if your son was that uncomfortable and it was 50 minutes then you should have got up and moved

He didn't tell THEM he was uncomfortable, and even then I'd say it was on you to move tbh

Yes I should have tried to find somewhere else to sit. I was hoping they would just get off but I didn't see anywhere to move to without walking up and down a busy train and maybe not finding anywhere. I should have tried harder to find a seat but in all honesty in some situations when i dont k ow what to do I go into freeze mode and I was just hoping they'd leave.

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BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 13:07

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:05

No the bit we were in was almost empty. Me, my son, the couple and another girl. The rest was pretty much full. It was an open train and not clearly divided by carriages but I was just trying to describe it. Our corridor bit was almost empty which is why I could hear them so clearly but there was nowhere to easily move to.

You said the carriage was nearly empty

It's like you keep changing the narrative tbh

You're so worried about your son being uncomfortable but couldn't be arsed to move

Luckyingame · 28/10/2025 13:07

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 10:40

At 10 all PDA is disgusting

Can't you move seats?

And at 46. 😁
I'm sure the kid won't be traumatised.

Darkdiamond · 28/10/2025 13:05

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 28/10/2025 12:57

You said it was almost empty??

No the bit we were in was almost empty. Me, my son, the couple and another girl. The rest was pretty much full. It was an open train and not clearly divided by carriages but I was just trying to describe it. Our corridor bit was almost empty which is why I could hear them so clearly but there was nowhere to easily move to.

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