Why did our friends stop posting on social media?

There was something of a seismic change where Facebook and insta stopped being for catching up on how people are doing, sharing interesting things, organising get togethers, and became all about showing off, portraying a consumerist lifestyle, one up manship and in the case of insta simply a marketing tool to separate you from your money by means of subtly implying your life is a bit shit compared to this person who has that thing.

I think most people of a certain age cottoned onto that quite early and made their exit from the whole shitshow.

@pictoosh it was.

Imagine the worst things you think about yourself and some you never thought of being written about you just because they can.

They took something that was a very enjoyable hobby and a lovely community vibe and utterly destroyed it.

Why does it need to be dirty? I use it as a diary of nice stuff I’ve done- walks and swims, that kind of thing.

@PegDope
That is really interesting. I'm sorry it became so dark for you when it shouldn't have been. Must have been very anxiety-inducing.

I had a YouTube channel with almost 100k subscribers and similar on Instagram.

I walked away last year because it was utterly toxic. My channel was not controversial, just me talking about my experience with something and documenting it. Really light stuff.

However the comments were vile. When it started to keep me up at night I knew I had to stop. I just stopped posting and deleted everything.

And would Temu and Shein ever just fuck off?

I will never order a thing from either. Ramming them down my feed is just pointless. No matter how often I try to get rid, they're back.

This thread is making me think about the whole gig tbh. I cba with social media...I don't have accounts on any other unless you include WhatsApp. I used to like watching tiktok but it's full of AI and adverts and clickbait as well.

Facebook is like mudlarking. Sifting through the gack hoping to find something interesting or valuable.
I have given up posting in all but a nominal way. I think it's dead on its arse for me.

Don't know how the youngsters feel.

My SIL lives her life entirely through Facebook. She is in her 40s so would have joined when it was new and exciting. I'm 60 and never, ever got into it. She still does the ' sad face it's raining' type posts when everyone she's posting to lives in the same place. She also does the post a picture of A and E with no information thing so everyone can say ' you OK hun?" " Oh PM me hun". I find it absolutely cringe. My mum came off Facebook because her DIL was posting constant streams of bile about my brother and how hopeless he is ( he is a total knob). Massively common in my mother's eyes. Private things remain private.My SIL doesn't have that filter. Her mother attacked her father with a pair of scissors and was sectioned. SIL put it all over Facebook. Grim is as grim does

I think.a lot of people including myself, have got bored with it.

Don't think I am shown many friends' updates either. Some...but not all. The feed is absolute noodles.

I agree, Facebook is ruining itself with this. The reason people go on there is to mainly see what their friends and family are up to, more so than instagram. I find my feed so frustrating, I often go and click on a friend’s profile and they HAVE updates, I just don’t get shown it.

I stopped posting on or reading Facebook a few years ago because it was just a bunch of shit, too many ads and news articles. I’m not overly keen on getting news via social media, as part of the problem is that unofficial channels present their stupid takes in the same style as established or independent media & this is why a lot of people struggle with media literacy.

I do use Instagram to keep up with both friends and brands/influencers/organisations that I like, and that is mostly manageable at the moment. Gave up Twitter last year for similar reasons to Facebook, it had been getting worse since the Musk takeover and there were barely any genuine updates on my feed, just A.I. slop.

Personal SM has had its day. We are all aware of the damage it can cause to self esteem, how cringey it is and how putting up photos of our children is a really bad idea.

I post more on insta stories these days - the baby days and pics of cute toddlers are done and my now teens don’t want their photos on Facebook but they will allow a few approved snaps on stories. I have Facebook still for a couple of friends still in it and a few fitness groups on there, otherwise it’s instagram. The teens are all on Snapchat and TikTok I think!

No one really uses Facebook like they used to, especially when many joined as teenagers and are now adults. I barely use it and have removed so many “friends” or people I no longer speak to. Many are opting to remove themselves from social media entirely citing the affects it has on family life and relationships and causes a level of mental health problems in some people. It’s also become so filled with ads and influencers pushing ads at you every two minutes. It’s just a constant selling point now which is leading many into financial difficulty. We are also now becoming aware of the dangers of posting everything about our lives on social media sadly

I've been surprised to see in the memory bits which come up that my family had been so active on FB in the past ie: tagging all of us in something that connected with them but may have also laughed at ie: neuro divergent traits.
Nowadays I'd be horrified at that and wouldn't appreciate the privacy issues involved.A neighbour posts her entire life story, her breakfast, her mental health, physical health, relationships, rows she had with young retail assistants etc on FB.It's exhausting to even glance at and I hope people learn not to do this.
Employers still haven't got the message and I think this will be an interesting area to watch, my local supermarket videoed their assistants with toilet rolls taped to their heads recently, toilet jokes etc, all for a toilet roll deal.

Because my kids are older, do less cute stuff and I feel different about posting about them now.

And Facebook itself has changed. Too many ads and other rubbish. But I an still involved in a few fb groups that are useful so I keep it.

I also miss the old Instagram where people just posted nice photos without too much chat or promotion.

I think social media has ended up contributing to people's poor mental health.
Some people have come to the same conclusion and stay out of it now.

I'm only 'on' facebook but I rarely post. My experience is the same as the OP's - ads, articles and very little by way of friends' activity.

It has been spoiled by greed, bragging, nefarious and malignant posters, competition, unrealistic depictions and vanity.

This is why we can't have anything nice.

For the same reason as you op.

Have they changed their profile so you only see certain things? I know you can do that on Instagram

It’s more visual/ photo based now. The statuses simply saying what you are thinking suddenly seem very naff and a lot like oversharing. I cringe a bit reading the majority of stuff on places like X, Threads etc too. Always seems like people who like the sound of their own voice.

I honestly can see anything on FB except reels and old news behind pay walls. The things I want to follow are hidden from me. So local business and community events I normally go to I miss.

I'm only on FB so they can store my photos free of charge and to see some SEN parent groups.

Someone needs to create a new version of it when you only see what you want to see again

According to a friend who has stopped posting, it was the bile and awful comments from other people. I never saw him post anything but the most anodyne stuff so what people took exception to, I'm not sure.

I have once or twice joined threads related to something I was interested in, such as an item on Channel 4 news. The comments people were leaving each other were aggressive and often unpleasant. I can see why people wouldn't bother.

I agree OP, Facebook is rubbish now for the reasons you mention. I mostly keep up with friends by WhatsApp groups now. And meeting up in person of course!