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AIBU?

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Original poster

Visitors turning up to stay has ruined my weekend

238 replies

Teizzz · 25/10/2025 16:20

Relatives have turned up to stay unannounced from 60 miles away. I was looking forward to having a very chilled weekend watching what I wanted on tv and snacking with some lovely walks.

AIBU to think its rude to turn up unannounced?

OP posts:
MO0N · 25/10/2025 17:02

Teizzz · 25/10/2025 16:25

I just want to be on my own.

Your fault, you shouldn't have allowed it!

JustSawJohnny · 25/10/2025 17:02

Why can't you just say sorry but this is my first child-free weekend in a while and I've made plans?

Cheeky fuckers.

Clearly you've opened the door now so the conversation will be more awkward but fuck it, send them packing!!

Itiswhysofew · 25/10/2025 16:58

Is this something that happens regularly in your family? If not, why do they think this is ok?

MeridianB · 25/10/2025 16:58

Just no. Their own beds are a just an hour away.

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 25/10/2025 16:58

Why on earth didn't you send them packing?

rainbowsandraspberrygin · 25/10/2025 16:57

So rude. I’d be fuming!!! Tell them to go away!!!!

arethereanyleftatall · 25/10/2025 16:56

This is all about boundaries op.

I think so many women, myself included, grew up never really learning how to say no.

and yet there’s people around us who have no problem saying no, and here’s the rub, aren’t disliked for it, on the contrary.

take my mum. She would do this, and then complain that I was ‘moody’. She wouldn’t dream of dropping in on my brother for a weekend, so doesn’t see him as moody at all.

if it’s at all possible, say ‘no’ op. Each time you say it, the next time is easier.,

waitamo · 25/10/2025 16:56

I'd swop houses with them, ask them for their keys.

Catsknowbest · 25/10/2025 16:55

Why do we always have to have posters who jump on with "you're wet haha" or similar? OP may genuinely not know how to deal with it. I do- made my contribution to how I would handle it up-thread- doesn't mean OP needs to be slated.

Inertia · 25/10/2025 16:55

This is madness. How did they even know you'd be in?

If my kids did this it would be absolutely fine because this is always their home, but I can't imagine anyone turning up and just demanding to stay.

Doyoumind · 25/10/2025 16:55

Is it your DC?

Arlanymor · 25/10/2025 16:54

It's only an hour away, they don't need to stay. They obviously didn't think it was too far to travel at the risk of you not even being home, so they can stay for some tea and then head back home can't they? They can't just elect to stay overnight at yours.

StrongandNorthern · 25/10/2025 16:54

Bloody rude.
I'd tell them to feck off.
But then, I'm old, and totally unsurprised by the way people can behave.
It will work though.

Changename12 · 25/10/2025 16:54

Did they literally say ‘we have come to stay?’ Just say they can’t and you have plans.

thepariscrimefiles · 25/10/2025 16:53

There is absolutely no justification for any visitors to just turn up without checking first, even if they are only popping in for five minutes. To just turn up and expect to stay for the weekend is really rude and inconsiderate. I'd be fuming.

Liverpool52 · 25/10/2025 16:53

WeeGeeBored · 25/10/2025 16:49

Are you sure they didn’t arrange it with DH who forgot to tell you?

Otherwise YANBU. I think I would have given them a cup of tea then sent them on their way.

Why have you assumed the Op is married married?

Blondeshavemorefun · 25/10/2025 16:52

Who are they

say No to staying

Freda69 · 25/10/2025 16:52

Incredibly rude - tell them you’ve got norovirus!

Owly11 · 25/10/2025 16:51

You sound passive. If you wanted a weekend on your own you need to make it happen. Offer a cup of tea and then make an excuse and send them on their way.

WallaceinAnderland · 25/10/2025 16:51

Another poster paying the wet lettuce tax 😂

Hankunamatata · 25/10/2025 16:51

Parents?

ChocolateCinderToffee · 25/10/2025 16:50

I remember relatives on my mother's side doing this once, and staying for a week. I have always wondered what my mother said that made them decide to descend - making a five hour car journey - without it being arranged beforehand.

Opal888 · 25/10/2025 16:50

This is unhinged behaviour. I hate anyone even calling in on me unannounced for 10mins, you need to send them packing!

Stillgroupie · 25/10/2025 16:50

Another poster who's a wet blanket.

Tink3rbell30 · 25/10/2025 16:49

Why haven't you used your words?

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