I work for a large company with lots of different departments.
Someone in another department to me is very vaguely connected to me through family. In-law of in-laws, that type of thing. I know his face and name and that's about it. Can't even remember the name of his wife or kids. He passes through my office sometimes and I always say hello, how are you, just pleasantries. I sometimes see him outside of work at extended family events.
This person has heard some information about me through the family grapevine. Pretty personal stuff such as the fact that my daughter is having problems since starting secondary school, that I had a health scare earlier this year, even some of the problems I've had in my marriage.
This has trickled back to me, and I'm really upset that colleagues have heard personal things about me that I haven't chosen to share myself. Some of the information he has shared isn't quite accurate either, or is told from a one-sided viewpoint. It seems he's told his entire department, enough for it to have spread out of his and into mine, anyway.
I feel as though I should bring this up with the person rather than go straight to someone senior, but I'm not really sure where I stand. Is just chatting about someone you know in the workplace OK? at what point is it not? It's not something I would do, but can I really do anything about it?
At what point does it become gossip and and what point does gossip become bullying?
I do hope that makes sense. I'm kind of dreading Monday, wondering if everyone has been gleefully discussing my marital issues in the pub 😄😭
And yes, I know I need to address the fact that family have clearly been gossiping about me too, but I know how to deal with that!