Do people really think their friends don’t notice re-gifted toiletries?

I spent 17 years receiving a toiletry set from my SIL and BIL for Christmas, every year. I suffer with eczema on my hands, and my skin is sensitive, so I have to be very careful what products I use. I had even mentioned that most products I can't use, over years, to no avail. My SIL doesn't involve herself with presents for her partner's side of the family (my husband is his older brother), so my BIL buys them. Some years, I hoped for makeup or perfume, but no!! I used to sell the gift sets on eBay after Christmas! Or I'd donate them as raffle prizes for my son's school etc. Last year, my husband told his brother not to bother with presents for us any more, just buy for our child.

I think regifting can be acceptable.
If you are given something which is clearly good quality, not outdated, then it is not unreasonable to do so.
For instance my partner has various allergies, so nobody can buy anything that she can use.

But if people give you clearly opened or cheap crap, then you need to make a point. For a notable proponent, I would open their gifts immediately, not allowing them to escape. "Oh that's interesting"

Then, as you escort them down the path, I would drop the offensive package in the bin.

This is why I suggested that the adult 'children' stopped buying at Christmas... specifically one on my SILs!

Just say to her "let's stop this".

Gift tag or gift card you spend?

Are you quite alright? You seem a bit obsessed with me and it’s getting tiresome now…

No the sticker will be on all the products in the 3 for 2.

So you didn't have to give her a present.

@MoustachaNatasha I would never ever re-gift. If I receive something that isn’t to my taste I take it to charity shop. If I care about someone enough to give them a gift, I make sure I put a lot of thought into it. I can absolutely tell when I receive a gift that’s been regifted. I would never want to make anyone else feel like that.

I've regifted items that look nice but I wouldn't use (sensitive skin). I figure someone may get the benefit of them and I think there's way too much waste and consumerism as it is.

XSIL. A total cow 🤣

My MIL gave me a Boots make up gift box one xmas in my favourite colours/shades, and I was pleasantly surprised that she'd actually put some thought into it. The gift box came with No 7 vouchers included inside (presume MIL hadn't noticed those), and said vouchers were 3 years out of date 😂 It must've been gathering dust in her house for years - AND she's the type to complain about her friends giving her re-gifts.
So yes, I get it OP, it's the no thought that counts. I just give thoughtless people like my MIL vouchers now, zero effort.

You weren't just referencing the workplace secret Santa so who are the other people you don't like who you regift to?

I had to smile when I received a siver tray for our ruby wedding gift and tucked underneath was a gift card addressed to the couple who gifted it to me . I never told them though !

I dont mind being given regifts and I dont mind baylis & harding either, I grew up without much and so appreciate any kind of gift someone gives me

For years a friend would give me random stuff like a decorative wall clock ( that didn't work) shampoo that was obviously counterfeit ( spelling mistake on the bottle - didn't use it, god knows what it would have done to my hair/scalp), chocolates that were turning white, you name it, I've had it. I always bought her decent stuff that I thought she'd like, and i came to dread the stuff she got me.

The friendship was a quite one-sided and when I didn't message her first I wouldn't hear from her, then the cheap & nasty gifts stopped thank god.

I think a lot of it was re-gifted, and yeah it's insulting, especially if you make an effort yourself.

Edited for typos!

My best friend (not short of cash), has gifted me recently drinks gift sets (think 5ml of gin) with the alcohol missing from it so just a small mixer in a box…..then, a gift bag full of free beauty samples she got from work……

i didn’t say anything as a)I couldn’t be bothered and b) It would be rude to embarrass her.

But when I bought her some brand new gin glasses as part of her present (part!), she handed them back to me and said she had enough - how fucking rude! 🤣 Sometimes I think the rudeness is maybe a cultural thing, being blatant. Oh well! 🤣

It’s not the end of the world…..

Why would that be obvious?

honestly, if you think they would enjoy it more and it takes dust…why not? Is it less valuable because not out of the shop? Why would that mean « less thoughts ».

Then, if it is because the gift isn’t really great…I am notoriously difficult to give for so I received loaaaaads I just can’t be bothered and always is the first to « not want to add more giving » because I don’t want to receive loool. I love offering though…but sometimes it comes late or at all if I couldn’t find something I really want for the person. You probably wouldn’t like that either op! 😂😂

All in all. Say thank you, move on.

It sounds to me like she had already decided she was snubbing you for some reason and the crappy gift was the first step.

My hideous SIL actually regifted to our DM, she gave her the present my DM gave her at Christmas ,gave it to her as a Mothers day present! I can remember my DM laughing at it!!

I don’t mind things that are regifted IF thought has gone into it. Like if someone got my sister something she doesn’t like, but she knows I’d love it - absolutely fine.
I would rather have nothing than thoughtless gifts - regifted or otherwise. Every year I say to people when they ask for Christmas ideas that I would be happy with a big bar of dairy milk or a bottle of alcohol free wine, and not to bother with toiletries because my skin is so sensitive that I can’t use them, and every year I get a flipping toiletry gift set. Why bother? I won’t use it and they know it. It bewilders me.

I will only regift something if I feel the other person would like it. I can’t do anything with a fragrance (makes me sneeze) so I regift candles perfume etc to people I know would appreciate. The rest goes to charity shops. Seriously it doesn’t bother me I know it’s regifted to me.

I’m just a bit fed up of presents altogether. I get stressed wondering what to get people and most of the time they don’t wear/use it. The amount of money I used to spend as well, or just give money, only for me and my kids to be given some rubbish from the sale. Anyway I’ve packed it in lately, I haven’t sent anything for my nieces birthday last week and got blanked about it, well my daughter didn’t get anything from them for her 21st a few months ago 🤔 my friend will be getting a bottle of wine and chocolates for her birthday, last year she gave me a Santa in a phone box.. for my birthday
As long as I’ve got my youngest what he wants I’m not really bothering any more.

I never regift, but my charity shop does well!

In my friend group/family we don't buy this kind of stuff for each other

I/We all buy our own particualr skin care, fragrance/smellies. We all like different stuff

Don't buy stinky shit for people ever unless specifically asked

We do random other things like if washing tablets are on offer, I'll get some and share, or anything like that, bog roll, kitchen paper, or a particualr spice thing I know they like