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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Boss keeps contacting me while on leave?

135 replies

wetlettuce41 · 23/10/2025 09:02

AIBU to want to be left alone to enjoy my leave?

Only on my second day of leave, and both days I have had missed calls from my boss at 8am…

Then he got a colleague to text me and ask for a call back.

Yesterday I did phone back, thinking it was urgent.

It really wasn’t. To do with my flexible working arrangement not having its yearly review back in June. This was supposed to be done by previous boss. I logged on yesterday as requested by new boss and sent through all the paperwork, forwarded the emails from June to show that I did send old boss the paperwork… I don’t know why it hasn’t been done. He said HR is on his back about it.

Not my problem is it?

I’ve done what was asked yesterday and this morning I’ve had another 8am phone call when I am trying to relax and text messages asking me to call back.

I work in the public sector. Never had this before. Boss is newly promoted.

OP posts:
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wetlettuce41 · 13/11/2025 21:03

Hello, just to some of the comments. As I’ve said numerous times already, the only reason I called back initially is because I assumed it must be an emergency to be contacted while on leave, I didn’t answer further calls or texts.
The only reason I was giving it more than a minutes headspace is because there has been a terrible atmosphere on the team since this newly promoted supervisor has started, unfortunately it is not just me on the team that’s had issues. Obviously if I’m on leave again I won’t be answering any calls. Thanks all for the advice.

OP posts:
nosleepforme · 13/11/2025 12:30

wetlettuce41 · 12/11/2025 19:14

Hi, just a quick update. The behaviour continued, contacted me again a few days after my last update and towards the end of my leave… again non urgent matters. Had an informal conversation with HR on my return, just to check. They said there is no policy that says management can’t contact me while I’m on leave… weren’t overly helpful to be honest and I feel a bit of a d*ck for even asking the question.

If you’re phrasing it as a question, then yes hr are right. You didn’t phrase it as “I’m not being paid so I’m not working, or I’m simply reachable”, so that’s on you

echt · 13/11/2025 05:48

Block his number. If he complains, say there's a work phone. Leave it in the office at the end of the day.

HelplessSoul · 13/11/2025 04:30

wetlettuce41 · 12/11/2025 19:14

Hi, just a quick update. The behaviour continued, contacted me again a few days after my last update and towards the end of my leave… again non urgent matters. Had an informal conversation with HR on my return, just to check. They said there is no policy that says management can’t contact me while I’m on leave… weren’t overly helpful to be honest and I feel a bit of a d*ck for even asking the question.

This is your own fault for even entertaining calls in the first place - no matter how serious/trivial the reasons from your boss.

As to HR saying theres no policy that management cannot contact you while you are off, similarly, there is no policy that says you are at their beck and call while on leave either.

You should have set boundaries from the outset and never engaged in the first place.

WeightLossGoal2024 · 12/11/2025 23:39

This is shocking, HR should have agreed this is inappropriate

GreatBigShaz · 12/11/2025 23:34

Just to add, although there may be no policy saying that you can't be contacted on leave, it doesn't sound like there is one saying you can either. I say this to reassure you that it is not unreasonable to politely hold your boundary on this from now on.

mumzof4x · 12/11/2025 23:19

Only you can set your own boundaries and it sounds like your manager has a poor etiquette with regard to staff time off
I’d say its up to you to raise this directly with him first . He/ she may be mortified and apologise in which case all sorted
Tbh it’s not something I would give more than a few minutes headspace to. …. “I’m on annual leave? is this an emergency? If not let’s pick this up on my return on Mon”
The end

JohnofWessex · 12/11/2025 22:01

There might not be a policy that you CANT be contacted on leave BUT it could come under other policies in particular harassment.

Contact your Union or if you are not a member join for next time he does it

grumpygrape · 12/11/2025 21:36

wetlettuce41 · 12/11/2025 19:14

Hi, just a quick update. The behaviour continued, contacted me again a few days after my last update and towards the end of my leave… again non urgent matters. Had an informal conversation with HR on my return, just to check. They said there is no policy that says management can’t contact me while I’m on leave… weren’t overly helpful to be honest and I feel a bit of a d*ck for even asking the question.

Perhaps they could help with advising you what level of overtime payments you are entitled to and how to claim them ?
Saturdays, time and a half, Sundays double time, Bank holidays ? On annual leave ?

PlaceIntheClouds · 12/11/2025 21:09

wetlettuce41 · 12/11/2025 19:14

Hi, just a quick update. The behaviour continued, contacted me again a few days after my last update and towards the end of my leave… again non urgent matters. Had an informal conversation with HR on my return, just to check. They said there is no policy that says management can’t contact me while I’m on leave… weren’t overly helpful to be honest and I feel a bit of a d*ck for even asking the question.

In fairness I doubt that there is a policy for that so there is little that they can do.

Stop answering the phone to him, or even go as far as rejecting the calls. It really is very simple.

ScaryM0nster · 12/11/2025 19:47

As a tactic for next time, a few days before you’re taking leave have a check in conversation. I’m going to be off from X, and dont intend to have my work phone or laptop with me. Is there anything you need before I finish up? Then last day, late morning - repeat the check.

Cardinalita90 · 12/11/2025 19:44

ACAS suggests contacting employees during annual leave is unprofessional. Seeing as HR haven't been helpful, could you buy a new phone and use your old number just for work? That way you can switch that phone off during leave and relax, and they won't have your personal number.

TheBeaTgoeson1 · 12/11/2025 19:29

Your boundaries are yours to hold. You’ll know for next time.

wetlettuce41 · 12/11/2025 19:14

Hi, just a quick update. The behaviour continued, contacted me again a few days after my last update and towards the end of my leave… again non urgent matters. Had an informal conversation with HR on my return, just to check. They said there is no policy that says management can’t contact me while I’m on leave… weren’t overly helpful to be honest and I feel a bit of a d*ck for even asking the question.

OP posts:
YorkshireGoldDrinker · 24/10/2025 10:10
  1. So incompetent that they don't realise you're on leave.
  2. So incredibly obnoxious that they want to keep you connected to work regardless of being on leave or being ill.

Either way, tell them professionally to sod off.

Miaminmoo · 24/10/2025 10:00

I have the same problem - sadly I am married to the boss 😂 in all seriousness though, we employ staff and I have no issue with being bothered whilst on holiday as I have a vested interest and my staff only ever bother us if it’s an emergency. As employers we would never dream of contacting any staff on leave unless it was an absolute emergency and then we would make sure they were given time back as it’s really not on. You need to raise this with the same HR department that apparently couldn’t wait for the information and to call at 8am (twice ) is disgraceful. I would be raising a grievance. Make them aware that they are causing you stress and anxiety about your job when you are supposed to be on leave from that job. If they really can’t cope without you then suggest they should pay you in line with your inability to be away from the business.

thepariscrimefiles · 24/10/2025 08:35

wetlettuce41 · 23/10/2025 19:27

He knows I’m on leave. He apologised yesterday for disturbing me on leave… then did the same again today. He has said in an email he will “give me the time back”. I don’t want the time back, I just wanted to have a break from work and not worry about it.

I get along with my colleagues really well so I feel bad for the one that has text me as I’ve totally ignored, I feel a bit rude. He shouldn’t be asking them to do that, I know.

Some of the comments on here have made my spidey senses tingle a little bit. Quite a few people on the team were very upset at his comments about reviewing everyone’s arrangements to see if we are in the best place… I have reasonable adjustments to help me yes, but I’ve been there a long time and not been told there is any issue with my work, nor am I aware of issues with anyone else’s work. We all do the same role. It’s a good team everyone is very hardworking I would say, overworked if anything. Not sure if because he’s newly promoted he’s trying to prove something? Am I’m not in any sort of management, I’m bottom of the pile.

If you aren't in one already, please join a union just in case your new boss's review of flexible working arrangements and reasonable adjustments turns into a review of your performance and an attempt to manage you out.

Ivelostmyglasses · 24/10/2025 08:11

A manager who repeatedly rings you when you are on leave does not have the skills to be assessing reasonable adjustments. Screen grab everything, including your colleagues messages. Get it recorded in your next 1-1 that it happenned & it is not a work pattern you accept. Your boss is playing loose. Get advise from your union and explain to them you feel vulnerable due to the reasonable adjustments. This is exactly what a union is for.

idri · 24/10/2025 07:16

I’m fuming for you.
I think you will definitely have to say something on your return. It’s not acceptable and now he thinks he can do this every time you’re on leave. What a prick.

pollymere · 24/10/2025 00:16

I used to be part of a crisis team. I went on leave on the Friday and the cover didn't start until Monday.

They coped. They didn't start phoning and demanding I come in — they'd decided they didn't need cover that weekend. It was ironically probably the only time in the history of the job I'd have been needed over a weekend.

Your boss doesn't need you when you're on leave. Especially not at 8am. Just consider what they'd do if you ended up in ICU. Would they be calling you or coping without you? So they should treat your Leave with the same respect.

LuceeeeeLoobieeel · 23/10/2025 22:48

LeedsLoiner · 23/10/2025 09:14

Start phoning you boss late on Saturday or Sunday evenings or very early on Sunday morning just to ask trivial stuff.
Make sure you phone him at 6.00 a.m. this Sunday (assuming you're back at work on Monday) and ask "anything I need to be aware of for when I come back tomorrow?"

This made me laugh a lot. Definitely do this OP.

canyouseemyhousefromhere · 23/10/2025 22:46

I once had a colleague who as he was leaving to go on annual leave said to our very needy boss “I’ve left my contact details for while I’m away in my top drawer, just in case of any emergencies “. It was before the days of mobile phones.

We opened his drawer and found a piece of paper with “Mallorca 999” written on it. 😁

Pessismistic · 23/10/2025 21:58

I also find this frustrating I would just put then on do not disturb and if boss says anything when you return just say that annual leave is not really leave if getting bombarded with messages calls. Just say this is your time to leave work at the office and it’s your time for rest and recuperation and you never start work at 8 anyway and you will be fast asleep. Tell them calls should only be made in a crisis not just for the sake of it. Your colleague should message you to say sorry I’m hassling you but he won’t let up.

HelenaWaiting · 23/10/2025 21:53

Worst one I ever had was when I was in hospital, postoperative, and on Tramadol. And yes, I did tell my boss to fuck off. And raised a grievance when I got back to work. The reason bosses phone people who are off sick / on leave is that they cannot do their own job properly. But they're the ones getting the big bucks. Leave them in no doubt that you will not let them get away with it.

Justus6 · 23/10/2025 21:24

Politely ask not to be contacted for the remainder of your leave if he persists contact the union.

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