Ultrasound childcare

But it wasn’t the only appt available, you were offered one that didn’t suit your plans, that was your choice op

So mums who have no support cannot access antenatal scans? That is bonkers. I don't understand why it is so hard for some people to imagine that there are some people out there who just cannot access childcare.

Many people prioritise routine as they get very anxious otherwise. Their mental health and management of feeling confused and anxious is valid and must be respected and not minimised.

The OP has already said the trust doesn’t allow parents to bring other children (which is a common policy)

That would be worse. If the mother won’t look after the child due to moving furniture if he seriously fucked off if she agreed to come to the scan instead

take the child with you? I get it's not ideal but it sounds like an important medical appointment and it's better to have it with the 3 year old on tow than not having it (I had growth scans with my youngest and had to take my 3 year old with me). I kept them busy with some food (that was before smart phones were a thing).

As someone who had limited childcare support get in sitters the babysitting agency. They are all really qualified. With 2nd baby some parenting preferences have to be compromised on.

She told you they couldn't babysit, your husband will just have to stay home not much else you can do

Yes but we just have to accept it, many parents are quite stuck in their ways routine wise and i understand you could do with their help here they've made it clear they can't assist so try and just let it go. The resentment this is causing will really fester otherwise.
If they're generally helpful focus on that.

I think you are perhaps getting a hard time from some because, some relevant information is missing in your original post.

From this comment ⬆️ I am taking it that you recently went for a private scan and they flagged up a potential issue which meant you were referred to obstetrics for a growth scan. None of that was clear in your original post. It would help to explain to others why you are understandably feeling so anxious.

I hope you can work it out and that everything is OK.

@Momofboys97 I'm not rude I'm realistic l. You can't magic childcare. If you could it would make all patents lives easier but unfortunately you have to run with what you have got.
You won't change your plans so why should you parents?
You can pay for private medical scans of course you can.

Tbf if I helped out once a week, then have advance notice that I couldn’t do one week, only for the person I help out to the book an appointment on the day I’ve specially said I can’t do, I’d put my foot down and say no too. She’s busy, she’s allowed to have a life. She knows OP has a husband or can find alternatives. I don’t think it’s mental at all

I honestly think this is just the reality of having more than one child. Some people have shit loads of grandparent help (many get burned out by the time the children are 5 or 6 but still feel forced to do it). Many of us don’t. I have two children and three sets of grandparents who have never cared for my children for more than an hour due to age, being unable or unwilling. We have just had to get on with it. It’s not ideal at times and at some points one parent has had to miss things or do things alone that they would liked to have had support with but it’s just not been possible.

We now have primary aged children and 3 of our parents needing support with medical stuff and the juggle is hard but necessary.

A friend, babysitter, childminder, nanny for a few hours ? Take him with you to the scan?

Honestly OP you just need to focus on a solution or managing your emotions about going alone. There's nothing to be gained from moaning about your parents. And certainly nothing to be gained from wanting other people to slag them off as well.

Not everyone's DH can get time away from work to attend scans or they might be looking after other children. Doesn't mean they don't care.

It seems to me that you don’t like being told you are being unreasonable, what do you want from this thread?

This makes their rigidity more understandable. Unfortunately, you probably will just have to deal with it.

Scans on your own aren't great, I do know as I've had many on my own during a high risk pregnancy, but a growth scan that you yourself aren't prioritising over a weekend away is likely to be uneventful.

I know your toddler's life is going to change, but a holiday is a luxury most toddler's manage fine without prior to the birth of their first sibling.

You can shout that into the void as much as you like but unless your mum changes her mind or you manage to magic up some suitable childcare then what are your options?

Your choices are limited at this point so you most likely have to go alone, it may be out of your hands.

Although did they say why they wanted you back again if you just had a scan recently? Was baby measuring big or small?

As an aside, wasn't the growth scan booked after your anomaly scan? (My hospital gave 3 scans as standard and each were booked after the prior scan)

@Momofboys97 you are being dramatic. It's a growth scan nothing else. If you were worried you would have gone for the earlier scan or paid for a private one. You are extremely selfish towards your parents here. They have plans doesn't matter what they are they told you in advance. You are being given options and you don't want to do them. It's not difficult to go for. Scan on your own. Plenty women do it on their own every day. So do not tell me I am being rude when you are being the exact same towards your parents.
I didn't have all my children in covid just my last one.

You sound very stressed out but I think you'll look back at this sometime later and realise it wasn't worth getting upset over and that actually you were fine.

Try to accept what will be, husband and 3yr old at the hospital whilst you have your appointment and then focus on the special weekend you have planned, you'll be ok.

I would be fuming too. Its couple of hours, not a full day.