Am I right to think people with easy babies have no idea!

I feel this.

As a mum of 4, all babies are different my 1st had cleft lip and palate and talipes, 2nd was how you describe, 3rd was awful 1st few weeks then my 4th was easier. all stages are different im now going into teen years.
Have you got anyone you can learn on for support? Xx

I found my first hard in the typical newborn way, but my second was another level.
He was lovely until around about 4 months, and then he didn’t stop whinging and griping and moaning and crying etc until he was around 18 months. Then it very, very slowly got better.
He’s 3 and 10 months now and mostly wonderful. A really happy little chap. He gets properly frustrated at his short comings still and that’s why I think he HATED being a baby.

All babies/toddlers have their time. Some are easy babies and absolutely terrible toddlers!

I am sure you can imagine enough not to come up with saying go on about how easy this stage is and to enjoy it

My son was the same, I still feel cheated when I see friends and relatives with chill babies who actually nap and don’t spend 80% of their awake time screaming. We haven’t had a second simply because I’m not willing to risk it again.

I did find it got better each time he met a new big milestone- sitting, crawling, walking, talking. Basically every time he gained a bit more independent ability to either get what he wanted or tell me what it was. In hindsight it was definitely “less shit” rather than actually being good each time that happened, but at the time it felt like life was improving dramatically.

Can imagine how hard it could be, just as I can imagine what it would be like to be rich, but I still really have no idea

Not going to lie, if I'd had my last baby first I would not have had any more.

I was one of those people who didn't get it.. my babies didn't sleep / would cry but were generally ok. I thought it was to do with me being amazing (not really but I felt lucky for sure).
Then one day I looked after my friends newborn for an hour and suddenly felt lick such a prick... she was the hardest baby to look after and 1 hour later I was done.

Definitely, people with easy babies have no idea. Their advice is the worst too as its so unrelatable.

It took me nearly 10 years to fully recover from my 'difficult' baby and feel up to having another.

I've got 3.
1st born was a nightmare, up every 1 1/2-2 hours. Didn't sleep through till 13 months. Won't even talk about teething, Was allergic to his milk I was knackered.
2nd she was the dream baby. Sleep 10/12 hours from 6 Weeks, she was amazing didn't grumble at her teeth or anything.
3rd she was poorly on and off for months, slept terribly varying from 2-5 hours so a little better than first. But I hardly slept for the 1st 6 months panicking about sids etc, etc. Was awful during teething and just generally hard work. Had the odd night of sleeping through at around a year and a half. But it's only in the last 3/4 months (she's nearly 2 and half) that she pretty much sleeps all night but it is later on she goes to bed. And in my bed by all accounts, she hated her cot, she moves so much and I think a lot of it was her banging herself on the side of it and waking up!

I promise it does get better OP you just have to go easy on yourself. There's no right of wrong, every baby is different xx

It can be very hard because it's usually the people with the easy babies who give you advice like "I'm a chill person so that's why my baby is calm and sleeps through the night so you should just be more relaxed". My chap was next level cranky I had to wear ear plugs for months to cope with the screaming. It took him a long time to settle down and he can still be a crank but he's a lot easier to manage now. Hang in there and take breaks when you can you're doing brilliant ❤️

My daughter (now 18 months) was challenging as a baby - cried a lot, wouldn't be put down, struggled to feed, always bored and grumpy. I would get so upset looking at my mum friends and their "easy" babies. BUT the tables have now turned and many of them are now struggling in toddlerhood whilst my DD is generally a delight!! Things can change fast!

My older 2 were great babies and sunny toddlers and my youngest was a lovely baby. Rarely cried and was a joy. I was totally smug until youngest hit 2 and became a monster and didn’t improve much until he was 20.

Those of us with 6+ children including an ‘easy baby’ may say that YOU have no idea, but that wouldn’t be helpful for you to hear . arbitrary dismissals of each others experiences rarely are.

I hear you. Mine vomited 24/7, and not just after a feed - like all day. I felt I couldn’t give her to anyone, or go anywhere because I was constantly cleaning up sick and changing her and me. We did no baby classes, no storytime at the library, no mum groups in cafes, nothing. My maternity leave was so lonely and stressful. One particularly bad day I was paying in the supermarket, she was in a sling screaming so I faced her forward as that sometimes helped, and she promptly threw up onto the checkout. It all stopped abruptly when she was weaned, there was nothing “wrong” she just grew out of it, and I remember so clearly thinking “omg maybe I can go out now”. Funnily enough, she’s not one of those toddlers that is always tearing about, she’ll sit at the table and colour in or do stickers - so now I’m having my happy relaxed going out for meals/cafe time while friends who had easier babies are having challenges. Who knows what they’ll all be like as teenagers! It’s not you ❤️

My friend has 4 kids. She says if she’d had the 4th one first, he’d have been an only child! They’re all different and mostly bloody hard work to varying degrees. They also constantly move the goalposts on you. One day at a time, you’re doing an amazing job xx

You don't need to experience something first hand to have some intelligence and imagine how hard it might be - even if it's possibly worst in real life.

My first (whilst amazing, lovely etc) was so hard I haven't felt strong enough to have a second! The people who make you feel like you're over-exaggerating it or that it's your fault/just you being a bit rubbish are the absolute worst. The ones who understand that babies have different temperaments, sleeping patterns, tolerance for being handed to a close relative for 30 seconds whilst you go to the loo, etc, can be lifesavers.

I'm with you OP, my DD was the most difficult baby I have ever come across. She would whinge constantly and would never be happy just sitting with someone/playing. She always wanted milk when she was near me, even if she'd just had some. Wouldn't sit in a bouncer even for 5 mins so I could stuff in dinner. Plus her sleep was dreadful and often she was up every half an hour/hour.

She's still quite needy now at 3 and it's a struggle to get her to do anything independently but definitely better than she was, so hang in there😊

I can relate to this. One of my DC was very easy. The other two were really really hard work in different ways. It will get better and there is light at the end of the tunnel. X

My first was a nightmare, screamed 16 hours day, barely slept , puked after every bottle and was just generally miserable. My second is far far better, hes so easy in comparison. Sadly if people have never experienced a difficult baby then of course theyll have no clue at all. Its only something you understand by going through it

I am so sorry, I really didn't mean others don't feel they adore their babies - reading it back it's horrible and I didn't realize. I had multiple miscarriages, a stillborn and my DS's twin was also a stillborn, I phrased it very badly.

Of course people with easy babies have no idea! Why would they if they haven’t experienced it

My SIL had an easy pregnancy and birth with her first who was a very content baby. She started doing classes for women in more deprived areas to teach them how to have a baby as happy as hers . Then her second baby arrived. He had reflux, didn't sleep, screamed for hours after feeds. She didn't do the classes anymore.

My dd was so hard. Never slept, wouldn't let me put her down, wouldn't be held by anyone other than me. I thought I'd lose my mind at certain points. I used to love it when people remarked on how difficult she was as it was somewhat vindicating! She's turning 2 shortly and she is such a joy to be around now. Always happy and loves to do what I ask of her. It will get better, I promise x