To sometimes feel there’s very little joy with life with toddlers?

29 replies

peppaontheyoto · 21/10/2025 07:40

I guess I must be unreasonable because my instagram feed is filled with how apparently I’m going to long for these days when I’m in my 80s (if I live that long.)

Toddler has been up since 535 (repeatedly tried to get her back to sleep and gave up at 545.) She’s ratty and grumpy. Nothing is good enough; TV, breakfast, books. Four year old is understandably feeling a bit neglected as every time he talks (which is constantly) she starts moaning. So he’s yapping away and bringing me various things to exclaim over while I’m in the shower. Nothing unusual there but just constant, endless.

I am so tired. I feel like I’m up and down all night at the moment. It isn’t always this bad but she practically never sleeps through - it used to be one wake up but lately it’s two / three and for the past few nights it’s endless, constant so that one merges into another. (Please don’t suggest co sleeping, it really doesn’t work, she never sleeps if I’m in with her and besides I’m desperate for some space.)

I am so fed up of the screeching over nothing. I know it is just toddlers and ds was the same but it’s just … you bring the wrong shoes or offer her breakfast and you get these wails and indignant screams. When I had just ds I hated it as well but there wasn’t a sibling to express displeasure at.

I am just praying it gets easier as at the moment sometimes it’s horrific!

OP posts:

Original poster

peppaontheyoto · 21/10/2025 08:04

Last night my toddler was pointing at a book and screaming BOOK! So I said shall I read you this book? "NO aargh!" (I put the book down, he points at it in rage and despair) "BOOK!" Son, what do you even want from me?!

This is my life. She woke me up crying at 3 saying ‘I want mouth.’ I still have no idea what that meant.

I don’t miss DS being two, he’s so much nicer and easier and just lovely now he’s four but he’s bringing himself up because I’m constantly dealing with the toddler. Feel awful.

OP posts:

MumoftwoNC · 21/10/2025 07:57

Yanbu.

My two are 5 and nearly-2, so I'm maybe half a year ahead of you and it's got a bit easier in the last couple of months. So hopefully it will for you too. But yes, relentless.

It's insane how sleep deprived I am.

I remind myself that they should probably still be in the womb for longer until they can walk, like other mammals do, lambs and deer etc. But because we are bipedal and have enormous heads for our big brains, we wouldn't be able to give birth to them any later. So here they are, screaming little grubs.

Zhx3 · 21/10/2025 07:56

I remember those days, OP! Mine are teenagers now so they're long behind me, but it's true, you will miss them being so small.

We walked past a pre schooler having a massive tantrum in town yesterday and I grinned at dh and ds, saying that I remembered those days well (ds was the worst tantrummer ever, he'd throw himself face down on the floor at the littlest thing).

Do you have dh/friends/family you can pass them to for a bit, maybe at the weekend if not during the week? The bone crushing exhaustion changes everything. Agree with pp to ignore where possible. My mum used to walk from room to room catching up on housework whilst ds followed her, tantrumming. I found that ds used to randomly fall asleep after a massive tantrum, it's exhausting for them too.

Big mug of tea, op. This too shall pass.

curious79 · 21/10/2025 07:48

It can be tiring and shit at that age. But you have two children at their psychological manipulation peak and if they catch wind of you capitulating or responding to demands / screams then things will get harder. Give her breakfast then do things and ignore

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