Schools admission criteria......

I think that’s quite unlikely though as a significant number… siblings will for the most part have both similar genetics (re intelligence, such of it as is hereditary) and similar environments (parents who have the ability and capacity to help with homework, Bond work books, books in the house etc etc)

Yabu, that's unfortunately just life... Especially if applying to a selective school. Life isn't fair. The sun shines on the righteous and the unrighteous alike. You win some, you lose some. If you feel that passionately about your daughter getting in to a certain school, then you need to move house. That's the reality of it.

Wait until op hears about contextual uni offers!

I agree. I can't tell you how many frustratingly sad stories I've known over the years, how many opportunities lost.
This resentment of having a child's Geography field trip paid for, or given a free revision guide is just beyond my ken. Absolutely appalling.

And also how does this work? You've got 25 really bright kids in a class and 5 siblings who are average at best, do they have their own work set or are they just made to feel shit for not keeping up?

You said your oldest gets the train? So ease of transport doesn't apply, it's not as if this is primary and you are driving them in 2 different directions. Your youngest can get public transport to whichever school she gets. You haven't mentioned which area this is but I presume there are other grammars she can apply to?

If she is bright she will do well anywhere.

Had the sibling policy been in place for your oldest, she may have not got a place. There are pros and cons to every policy, but a sibling priority system has no place in secondary schools, especially grammar

Agree - well said!

Now that is incredibly unfair, when other children work so hard to get in. What area is this?

But you don't want to improve education for all. And you don't care about pupils who are just above the PP threshold. You just want your daughter to have a better education than poor children. You think she is more worthy because she comes from a "normal" family.

You can pass uniform down to people who are not siblings. And ease of transport is irrelevant, given you seem like you live pretty far from the school.

The cost of trips is not allowed to be inflated to subsidize other pupils. The discount that some schools offer for PP comes from direct funding to the school.

You're pissed off, and worried for your daughter, I get it. But you're also "punching down" in a really unpleasant way. It's good that you've done so anonymously because I don't think many would look on what you've said in a positive light.

I know, which is why myself and other amazing Care Leavers are trying to change an corrupt system and lead by example. Unfortunately change takes time and we need to learn from the lessons of the past to save the future. All children no matter their circumstances deserve equal access to opportunities to an education whether that be vocational or academic. The opportunity to have a stable and safe adulthood.

It means they are a much, much higher chance of being educationally disadvantaged.

They are much more likely to have ACEs (adverse childhood experiences).

They also don't have disposable income for extra curricular experiences, or to pay for a daily train to get to school.

@LookingforMaryPoppins think you’re being a bit melodramatic here.

Dont know any grammar that has sibling priority- and if yours did your elder dd might not have got in?

also don’t know any grammar school without pp or in care as priority groups. For those near us (Bexley/Kent) those admission rules have been in place for some time and only a tiny number each year from those groups get in.

hand wringing about ‘normal families who value education and work hard’ not getting equal access to grammar schools is nonsense.

The things I wish I could say, but would get banned for. It has nothing to do with hardworking families. You could have 2 very hardworking parents in shit jobs that you would refuse to do, still having to claim free schools meals for a multitude of reasons that we don't know about. Hardworking has nothing to do with a LAC. This whole thread is revolting and your replies just get more and more entitled.

What I want to say but can't..... .... ...... ...... ........ ..... ... ..... ..... ...... ...... ..... .... ...... .......... ... ...... ....... .... ....... ...... ....... ........ ......?*£%^&

Op which county are you in? I have never known any Grammar school to fulfill it's quota of pupil Premium and children in care. What I mean is that if they reserve 20 places it's highly unlikely that even 10 would fill. This thread doesn't ring true.

OP - AIBU?
The world - yes!
OP - but but but

Agreed she should be banned for just this

You and your pesky principles! I'm glad it worked out for you, though.
We know that for so many, it doesn't.

@LookingforMaryPoppins it's not just about income.

Quentin who has 2hrs tutoring ever week, might not be as bright as Sally who has zero tutoring and who comes from a 2 parent NORMAL family, with 2 working parents, but still claim free school meals, why, that's none of our business.

Also LAC may live with high earners but come from a very different background.

Finally so what if you have a sibling who goes to grammar too. They are trying to award places on merit whilst levelling the playing field. This thread screams "But all lives matter".

Thank you, funnily enough I actually experienced homelessness during my Masters studies. I got the keys to a LA house the day after I handed in my PMP.

Proud to say five years later I returned the property to the LA in a vastly improved state despite my then limited income.

I have been fortunate. My then fiancé now husband and his family offered me a home. I could have done as others would continued living in the property and then purchased it via right to buy then made a significant profit either renting it out or selling it. My pesky principles of what I consider to be fair and equitable to other disadvantaged individuals having an opportunity to be safely housed got in the way of my making a financial gain.

OP is essentially miffed that the school is applying its criteria. They don’t live in the priority zone and her DD’s test score doesn’t sound strong enough for that to be grounds alone. OP have you checked if moving closer would get you further up the list? Also what’s the in-year transfer admission like?

I agree

It's just unbelievable.

Thank you for sharing your story, @Wasitabadger . It is one repeated many times over. I genuinely do not know why anyone would resent giving help and support to such children.
It's not like you were given a free house and a car.

any child that isn't in care or pupil premium is on a back foot

This is one of the most staggeringly tone-deaf statements I've ever read on MN.

I find it really hard to believe that someone is so blinkered and unaware of the myriad disadvantages that come with PLAC LAC and PP students that they think they shouldn’t have priority.

Also ‘normal’. That’s just horrible.