Page 2 | Viewer stole from my house?

Calcaata · 2025-10-18T19:29:31+00:00

I have a Diptique candle, 3 wick and cost £180. I’ve had two house viewings today, not done by myself but by the estate agent. I’ve come home and it’s missing. Aibu to expect the estate agent to reimburse me?? I won’t be able to contact them now until Monday.

Westfacing · 20/10/2025 08:37

doorbellringer2 · 20/10/2025 01:03

@Calcaata
Hello lovely, I’m the estate agent who posted earlier. I just wanted to clarify, in no way was I blaming you or anyone else who has had a bad experience. No one has the right to enter your home and steal from you.
I was just trying to say that your EA should have advised you to remove anything of value, because no one can be 100% trusted. The viewing procedure is sadly lacking in identity confirmation, that would make people know they were accountable for their actions.
I hope you get it sorted.

Obviously people should move anything of obvious value e.g. jewellery, money, portable silverware, etc from view, but a candle?

It's not something you would think be at risk, no matter how pricey!

It's awful for everyone concerned to be under suspicion for theft, apart from the thief of course.

I do hope the OP comes back to say how she got on with reporting it to the EA.

RokaRokaRoka · 20/10/2025 07:56

Calcaata · 19/10/2025 00:28

Because I wanted to use it as a teapot.

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No advice... but love this reply 🤣
Ignore all the nit pickers OP
I wouldn't spend that much on a candle because I'm tight but I'd totally be swooning over it and applauding you for buying it
All the negative Nellie's are just jealous

Bluecrystal2 · 20/10/2025 07:36

DotAndCarryOne2 · 19/10/2025 07:38

In the back garden of our last house there was a beautiful peach tree in full fruit at the time we were selling. The EA showed viewers round one afternoon and after they had gone, the security camera at the back of the house showed her taking a cutting from the tree and then filling a big carrier bag with peaches before she left.

My DH sent the footage to the EA from his phone and asked if they intended to deduct the cost of them from our bill. We got a very red faced apology from the manager, who assigned us to a different member of the sales staff, and we did our own viewings from that point on !!

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That's awful. Same thing happened to my sister, but it was cherries.

I would say a female is more likely to go for a scented candle. Sniff next time EA comes round.

GinSwiggers · 20/10/2025 07:25

My feeling is the theft is more likely to have been done by the EA.

I could be wrong, but surely the viewers (who have to give contact info etc) knew they'd be in the firing line if they stole anything?

The EA could blame the viewers and also presume the OP (seller) wouldn't pursue it.

I'd like to know if the viewers knew there were other viewings that day.
If they did, they may have taken a chance and decided the OP wouldn't want the police involved in contacting several viewers (all of whom might simply deny stealing.)

But if neither viewer knew of the other, my money's on the agent stealing it.

Either way, a formal complaint is needed to the EA (because they were placed in a position of trust to look after your home and possessions) and contact with the police too.

GAJLY · 20/10/2025 07:11

Have you reported it to the estate agent yet? They need to know as they can log the viewers names in case it comes up again at another viewing. I'd actually report it to the police online.

U53rName · 20/10/2025 07:01

LikeWhoUsesTypewritersAnyway · 19/10/2025 21:51

This. ^

I am not going to bash the OP for spending £180 on a candle, as it's up to her what she spends her money on. But let's not pretend that 'most people will cough up £180 for a candle if they have a decent amount of surplus income.' Most people would not. There was a thread on here the other day about the £200 beef wellington from M & S, and people were talking about it like it was just normal and regular for people to spend this on a beef wellington, and how 'it's only £33 per person, per portion.' 🙄

DH and I are solvent, no mortgage, upper working class, well-educated, live in a rural middle class village, both reasonable earners, plenty of savings, and decent pensions, and no way would we spend this kind of money on a candle, or a beef wellington! We can afford it but we wouldn't spend it. We'd spend on tangible things that will grow in value yes, but a candle and a beef wellington for £180 to £200? Just no.

My 2 DC (aged 30-ish) are high earners (high income tax bracket, 6 figures,) and have decent savings, and surplus income, and they would never spend this kind of money on a candle either. I told the one about this earlier, and she gasped, and said 'like hell would I spend that on a candle!' So it's a myth that anyone who can afford it would buy it.

As I said, the OP shouldn't be mocked and derided, but let's not kid ourselves that it's normal to spend £180 on a candle, because it's really not. The majority of people wouldn't spend this on a candle ... Even people who have a good amount of surplus income.

.

Edited

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Of course your DD gasped when she heard about the £180 candle—she was raised working class and presumably hasn’t been earning a 6-figure salary for long. When she’s in her 50s and has been earning a high salary for decades, she won’t bat an eyelid at a £180 candle.

WigglywagglyWanda · 20/10/2025 07:00

The poster who "couldn't live with themselves if they spent that on a candle' 🤣

This thread has brought out the most classic of mumsnet tropes

Im imagining posters shaking and crying behind the sofa when the doorbell rings and making a chicken last a family a week.

Op I know it wasnt intentional but youve brought em out of the woodwork.

Good luck with the estate agent later

Billybagpuss · 20/10/2025 06:13

Calcaata · 19/10/2025 23:28

Well I do want to thank everyone who’s commented with advice, defended me and even the bat shit posters who’s heads blew up in a rage - you actually gave me a good laugh.

I think the person who insinuated I should kill myself for spending that money might have been a touch on the extreme side. But if I do take her advice I hope she lights a candle in my memory.

I did lie and the candle actually cost £179, so hopefully this now means I can count it as theft.

I won’t be updating as I wouldn’t give some of the posters on here the pleasure. I’m not flouncing - I’ll still be around 😊

I hope you do contact the estate agent today, I understand not wanting to update this bizarre thread further but please do if anything interesting comes from this, you can’t be the first this has happened to.

also my Christmas list has something interesting on it so thank you and has anyone checked eBay for a partially burned candle.

moose62 · 20/10/2025 06:09

Sometimes Mumsnet astounds me! What the hell does it matter what was stolen....a theft is a theft.
I would speak to the agent straight away and ask them if they were with the viewers at all times as an item of property has been stollen.
I'm sure they won't admit to leaving anyone unattended or even perhaps swiping it themselves!
Perhaps hide any expensive but easy to remove items if you have any more viewings. You shouldn't have to but ut us a shame that people can't be trusted

BastardtheCat · 20/10/2025 06:00

What an unbelievable thread - so many responses have left me speechless.

OP - it’s theft - I really agree that you need to chase this up and even grab a case number from the Police.

I don’t blame you for not updating neither. The posters on the thread who’ve focused on the candle are seriously questionable.

HeatingFiddler · 20/10/2025 05:45

Differentforgirls · 19/10/2025 20:40

And I will again.

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😘

AnnoyedAsAllHeck · 20/10/2025 05:33

Emonade · 18/10/2025 22:41

It is a waste and I don’t know how people can live with themselves unless I am being totally unreasonable and they are also giving significant amounts to charity

Head's up YABTU and rude. Cannot forget rude.

Your sanctimony is noted.

BTW--I spend money on stuff I am sure would twist your knickers tight. I also live with myself just fine.

AnnoyedAsAllHeck · 20/10/2025 05:23

Calcaata · 19/10/2025 09:37

I produce it Dip..ya..mum

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I say Dip-Teak, like Boutique but with "Dip" as the first syllable instead of "Boo".

YMMV 😉

AnnoyedAsAllHeck · 20/10/2025 05:06

wintersgold · 20/10/2025 01:15

Diptyque candles are top of the line in quality, and far from a waste for many people.

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ITA!
The company keeps putting out new candles, bath and body items, perfumes, home decoration items and items to scent wherever you wish. I very much doubt they are having any trouble selling items, including their 2-300 pound candles.

AnnoyedAsAllHeck · 20/10/2025 05:01

Calcaata · 19/10/2025 22:34

Do you really have nothing more interesting to discuss with your daughter? I’m sorry I actually laughed at the “she gasped” - she must be easily shocked.

Diptyque as a company make a reasonable profit each year. Can’t imagine that’s based on the one candle I bought this year.

I dread to tell you what I recently spent on a lamp, you’d probably speed dial your daughter to tell her and then you’ll likely both get a touch of the vapours and so I couldn’t possibly subject you both to that.

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I am so sorry that you are getting taken to task for gasp ENJOYING something that others may not enjoy.
I personally find it funny as heck that ANYONE on MN or anywhere else, judges someone because they bought an expensive candle that they love and enjoy when it burns.
Maybe all of these critics should post what they spend money on and the rest can critique their choices.
Diptyque not only makes very high quality candles, but perfumes that will knock your socks right off those critical little slippered feet. Their candles burn a long time, smell wonderful and are much better quality than pretty much anything else out there.
Another maybe: Everyone should not spend more than 15 pounds on any perfume, ever, 17 for a bra, 25 for a purse and never, ever, more than 45 pounds for any outfit or pair of shoes. Never, ever buy a Jellycat, Adidas shoes, Nike and definitely no Ralph Lauren jumpers. After all, if you don't buy the cheapest available, you are wasting money, right?

Blondeshavemorefun · 20/10/2025 03:57

DotAndCarryOne2 · 19/10/2025 18:48

It looks it too. Nothing like Diptyque.

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I didn’t say it did

someone said you couldn’t get a 3 wick candle for a few pounds

this burns well and smells lovely for £5 ish

wintersgold · 20/10/2025 01:15

Emonade · 18/10/2025 22:29

Maybe don’t waste so much money on a candle

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Diptyque candles are top of the line in quality, and far from a waste for many people.

doorbellringer2 · 20/10/2025 01:03

@Calcaata
Hello lovely, I’m the estate agent who posted earlier. I just wanted to clarify, in no way was I blaming you or anyone else who has had a bad experience. No one has the right to enter your home and steal from you.
I was just trying to say that your EA should have advised you to remove anything of value, because no one can be 100% trusted. The viewing procedure is sadly lacking in identity confirmation, that would make people know they were accountable for their actions.
I hope you get it sorted.

Original poster

Calcaata · 19/10/2025 23:28

Well I do want to thank everyone who’s commented with advice, defended me and even the bat shit posters who’s heads blew up in a rage - you actually gave me a good laugh.

I think the person who insinuated I should kill myself for spending that money might have been a touch on the extreme side. But if I do take her advice I hope she lights a candle in my memory.

I did lie and the candle actually cost £179, so hopefully this now means I can count it as theft.

I won’t be updating as I wouldn’t give some of the posters on here the pleasure. I’m not flouncing - I’ll still be around 😊

OP posts:

lemonraspberry · 19/10/2025 23:10

£180 on a candle is not outrageous. The same can easily spend that on perfumes, shoes, cigarettes, bottle of wine or whiskey. I don’t get why people spend money on personalised number plates- what is the point? But if they want one it is not for me to judge.

phone the estate agent and complain, see what they say.

Witsendneedhelp · 19/10/2025 23:01

Squirrelmirrel · 19/10/2025 22:55

Does it actually burn for 180 hours? Am I the only one wanting to now buy one of these candles😁

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Apparently so according to this description of the 600g candle!

PortSalutSherryHello · 19/10/2025 23:00

Ewock · 19/10/2025 22:59

I'm sorry if I read your post in a way you didn't intend. But it read in a way that you were calling the op a fool who is easily parted with her money.

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Yeah funny I got that impression too...

Ewock · 19/10/2025 22:59

NotForTheMoneyandNotForTheApplause · 19/10/2025 22:56

You've totally missed my point, I have no problem at all with the OP spending her own money on whatever she chooses and of course it's theft if someone has taken it.

I'm querying the assumption by some posters that those who think she's silly to spend so much on a candle think that because they are in some way jealous.

Im saying that if there was a thing that I thought people spent too much money on it would in no way be because I was jealous as by definition I have no interest in spending that much on that thing

I've noticed before that some posters often can't see any reason for things other than jealousy and ime that's not a very common emotion

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I'm sorry if I read your post in a way you didn't intend. But it read in a way that you were calling the op a fool who is easily parted with her money.

AnAlpacaForChristmasPleaseSanta · 19/10/2025 22:58

WigglywagglyWanda · 19/10/2025 22:53

Im almost as gripped as the designer glasses theif a few months ago.

She got em back, for the record.

Op do update us

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I loved that thread. The thief wasn't that bright though. Don't pose with your stolen property on SM, first rule of theft club. Apparently.

NotForTheMoneyandNotForTheApplause · 19/10/2025 22:56

Ewock · 19/10/2025 20:59

Your logic doesn't track. The op loves the candle and gets a lot of pleasure from it so for her it isn't foolish to pay that price. It is worth it to her. I'm sure we all spend money on items/experiences that others think are a waste of money. But it is very rude to express that and completely ignores the issue which is that someone stole something from the op house. Doesn't matter what price it was or what it was, theft is theft.

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You've totally missed my point, I have no problem at all with the OP spending her own money on whatever she chooses and of course it's theft if someone has taken it.

I'm querying the assumption by some posters that those who think she's silly to spend so much on a candle think that because they are in some way jealous.

Im saying that if there was a thing that I thought people spent too much money on it would in no way be because I was jealous as by definition I have no interest in spending that much on that thing

I've noticed before that some posters often can't see any reason for things other than jealousy and ime that's not a very common emotion