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AIBU?

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Jam sandwiches at wraparound care

736 replies

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 08:17

My reception age DD goes to a really well arranged breakfast club and after school club 4 days a week. It works very well with 2 commuting parents. I only have one gripe and that is with the food they offer. Technically the food should align with the school’s healthy eating policy, as it’s run by the school not an external provider. The school has asked parents not to provide sweet treats in lunch boxes and it’s quite strict about sandwiches.

HOWEVER the school is not transparent about the wraparound food offer and I had to email three times to get them to tell me what they provide. Once they did, they disclosed that the after school options include a range of sandwiches, including jam, plus a pudding of cake and fruit. Of course, my four-year-old always goes for a jam sandwich and ends up with a very sweet tea 4 days a week. The school says they offer carrot sticks etc, however, not one single parent has ever mentioned this in conversation and so I just think it’s something they say but don’t provide.

We do talk at home about the importance of a balanced diet, but she’s still only four and temptation is there! She’s offered something a bit more nutritionally balanced she gets home, but she’s usually just full of jam sandwich!

I emailed the school to ask them if they are able to comment on this or if they ever review the food that they provide at wraparound care, but I haven’t received a reply. AIBU to push this further?

OP posts:
thisishowloween · 18/10/2025 09:31

Octavia64 · 18/10/2025 09:29

You should see what they give kids in Italy op!

this really isn’t a British thing.

And Australia!

Fairy Bread (white bread with butter and sprinkles), anyone?!

Everythingthatmatters · 18/10/2025 09:30

I’m sorry I disagree with the majority. I would not be happy with jam sandwiches 4 days a week. I don’t class cheese as the same category as this. I’d expect cheese or maybe even just a buttered crumpet instead. I know it’s just a snack but it is a lot of sugar with the fruit and cake.
we should hold higher standards for our kids

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 09:29

ChickalettasGiblets · 18/10/2025 09:25

Personally I find it worrying that you’re talking about a “balanced diet” with a 4 year old and giving her a complex about unhealthy eating.

It’s a jam sandwich, not rat poison. If you don’t like the food they serve then either send some with her to have or find another childcare provider

We talk about eating all sorts of foods, we try things that are new, we make sure we put a bit of everything on our plate. It’s very simple and not rigid at all. She doesn’t know it’s ‘a balanced diet’.

OP posts:
Octavia64 · 18/10/2025 09:29

You should see what they give kids in Italy op!

this really isn’t a British thing.

thisishowloween · 18/10/2025 09:29

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 09:23

For me 🤣. You may all carry on as you wish.

And yet you're still here 😂

Coffeeishot · 18/10/2025 09:29

catspyjamas1 · 18/10/2025 09:25

Bonkers! Dual national here and can assure you that in the country I grew up in, jam sandwiches were, and are, prolific. It has nothing to do with being British. Your prejudice is showing and its gross.

Im just back from a European holiday where spainish and French adults /children were dipping cake into chocolate for breakfast and then pouring jam over crossiants, 😀

Leapintothelightning · 18/10/2025 09:26

it does sound odd to me and definitely wouldn’t meet guidelines/standards here in Scotland or in any healthy eating policy I’m aware of. If it bothers you that much, speak to your daughter and ask her to please choose a different type of sandwich (providing that she does like the ham/cheese on offer). An occasional jam sandwich isn’t the end of the world I wouldn’t be complaining to the school about it.

Confused3456 · 18/10/2025 09:26

We all know healthy options are more time consuming and more expensive. I notice how much those ‘organix’ healthy snacks for kids are compared to unhealthy ones for example and how much time it takes to prepare a healthy lunch over one full of quick and easy snacks and easy sandwich fillings.

What annoys me about this is that the school expect busy working parents to spend time and money preparing expensive healthy lunches but can’t be bothered with the time and expense of providing these for kids after school.

This also means parents have to out more effort in after their working day making sure the kids dinner is healthy to make up for the unhealthy after school snack they’ve had. This should be the other way around, the school should be making sure the kids are having a nutritious snack after school to make up for a parent who only has time to make chicken nuggets and chips for dinner!

TheNightingalesStarling · 18/10/2025 09:26

Is this supposed to be a snack or the evening meal after a cooked meal at lunch time?

ChickalettasGiblets · 18/10/2025 09:25

Personally I find it worrying that you’re talking about a “balanced diet” with a 4 year old and giving her a complex about unhealthy eating.

It’s a jam sandwich, not rat poison. If you don’t like the food they serve then either send some with her to have or find another childcare provider

Dissappearedupmyownarse · 18/10/2025 09:25

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 08:17

My reception age DD goes to a really well arranged breakfast club and after school club 4 days a week. It works very well with 2 commuting parents. I only have one gripe and that is with the food they offer. Technically the food should align with the school’s healthy eating policy, as it’s run by the school not an external provider. The school has asked parents not to provide sweet treats in lunch boxes and it’s quite strict about sandwiches.

HOWEVER the school is not transparent about the wraparound food offer and I had to email three times to get them to tell me what they provide. Once they did, they disclosed that the after school options include a range of sandwiches, including jam, plus a pudding of cake and fruit. Of course, my four-year-old always goes for a jam sandwich and ends up with a very sweet tea 4 days a week. The school says they offer carrot sticks etc, however, not one single parent has ever mentioned this in conversation and so I just think it’s something they say but don’t provide.

We do talk at home about the importance of a balanced diet, but she’s still only four and temptation is there! She’s offered something a bit more nutritionally balanced she gets home, but she’s usually just full of jam sandwich!

I emailed the school to ask them if they are able to comment on this or if they ever review the food that they provide at wraparound care, but I haven’t received a reply. AIBU to push this further?

I wholeheartedly agree with you OP.
A jam sandwich is carbs on carbs ffs and offers absolutely no nutritional value to your child whatsoever.
Its an UPF which causes microbial gut disruption, behavioural changes including ADHD, developmental issues, not to mention tooth decay. But don't worry OP, thet probably buy a cheap jam full of chemically altered sweetners and E numbers to make it 'healthy'.
Before anyone shoots me down in flames for being a fun sponge, all the above is a medically proven and factual.
My 9mth old baby was offer jelly at nursery and I went nuts! She was only just starting to try foods and someone thought that offering a blob of food colourings and chemicals was a good start for her developing gut! She didn't need a 'pudding' at 9mths old ffs 😡😡
It really pisses me off that because people rely on wrap around care they are expected to suck up the shitty food options that are associated with it. Its not cheap either for parents and I get that budgets in breakfast clubs etc are stretched but I'd rather they charged a little more and offered sensible options instead.
Nobody is expecting home cooked from scratch, organic platters but just a little more thought goes a long way IMHO.
If you're not happy, the only option is send your DD with a pack-up and tell the teachers that shes only allowed to eat from that. Those instructions must be respected and followed, just the same as if it was for allergy, health or religious based reasons.

Sausageplait · 18/10/2025 09:25

This is the norm at after school clubs. They run on a small margin and need quick easy food to prepare.
After school clubs close at the drop of a hat. Be glad you've got one and stop making a fuss about something so trivial.

catspyjamas1 · 18/10/2025 09:25

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 08:38

I’m going to close the thread. I suppose it confirmed my own opinions that the British population has an incredibly low bar with nutrition expectations for growing children.

Bonkers! Dual national here and can assure you that in the country I grew up in, jam sandwiches were, and are, prolific. It has nothing to do with being British. Your prejudice is showing and its gross.

Istanbol · 18/10/2025 09:25

The point is if you provides jam sandwiches for lunch and then jam sandwiches were offered as a snack, that wouldn’t be a balanced diet. As it is, your child is having a balanced nutritional diet for all her meals therefore a jam sandwich at wrap is not going to tip her overall diet into being unbalanced.
This is literally a first world problem.

Mistressofnone · 18/10/2025 09:24

Mother of a fussy eater with sensory issues, it’s more of a worry they will go hungry than consume a thin layer of fruit jam after school. Sorry for the low bar!

Coffeeishot · 18/10/2025 09:23

Ivelostmyglasses · 18/10/2025 09:18

I don't understand the replies you are getting. Perhaps people don't experience healthy snacks in their school. It makes absolutely no sense for a school to provide a snack that a parent would not be allowed to bring in.

Also the concept of healthy food in School is to ensure children get a healthy meal somewhere. Not every child gets a meal at home. Young people's health is changing fast due to the huge range of "non-food" items supermarkets sell and the pester power of fast food & financial pressures. It might sound overly virtuous but it is really important.

Healthy eating at lunch and a jam sandwich once a week is about balance imo and probably just as "unhealthy " as processed ham sandwich, food should be balanced and enjoyed a bit of jam on some bread isn't the same as filling lunch boxes with processed crap.

childofthe607080s · 18/10/2025 09:23

Now I would avoid jam sandwiches for lunch but quite happily supply them at snack time- they are a better snack than biscuits and cheaper than ham and cheese

perhaps plain bread and butter would make it more lily they eat the carrots for sweetness hit

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 09:23

ZXZXZ6789 · 18/10/2025 09:21

I’m going to close the thread.

OP is now desperately looking for the the " @JBeanGarden has turned off comments" button 😂

For me 🤣. You may all carry on as you wish.

OP posts:
thisishowloween · 18/10/2025 09:22

SocksAndTheCity · 18/10/2025 09:21

I love a jam sandwich. Or a lemon curd one ☺️

You've given me a craving for lemon curd now Grin

thisishowloween · 18/10/2025 09:22

Doodlingsquares · 18/10/2025 09:20

Its the double standard that's the issue - parents are banned from using these easy options in their kids packed lunches on health grounds, but its ok for school to enjoy the convenience?

ASC and the food there is often provided by external suppliers.

Mischance · 18/10/2025 09:21

She is full up from the bread!

At that point in the day children are very hungry and need a snack of some kind.

You could tell the school she is not to have the jam sandwiches if you feel that strongly, but it would be worth researching what else she might get and deciding if you object to that too.

SocksAndTheCity · 18/10/2025 09:21

I love a jam sandwich. Or a lemon curd one ☺️

ZXZXZ6789 · 18/10/2025 09:21

I’m going to close the thread.

OP is now desperately looking for the the " @JBeanGarden has turned off comments" button 😂

SmoothCollie · 18/10/2025 09:21

I wouldn't like my dd being given processed white bread 4 times a week regardless of what was in it. So so unhealthy, why can't they provide real food?

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 09:20

For a bit of balance, the child nutritionist and author of a range of books that many use for weaning etc, Charlotte Stirling Reed, has also recently posted about this, in the context of chocolate spread. I don’t think questioning the offer is vastly unreasonable when the school is quite clear I wouldn’t be allowed to provide the EXACT SAME THING if it came from
home.

OP posts: