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AIBU?

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Jam sandwiches at wraparound care

736 replies

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 08:17

My reception age DD goes to a really well arranged breakfast club and after school club 4 days a week. It works very well with 2 commuting parents. I only have one gripe and that is with the food they offer. Technically the food should align with the school’s healthy eating policy, as it’s run by the school not an external provider. The school has asked parents not to provide sweet treats in lunch boxes and it’s quite strict about sandwiches.

HOWEVER the school is not transparent about the wraparound food offer and I had to email three times to get them to tell me what they provide. Once they did, they disclosed that the after school options include a range of sandwiches, including jam, plus a pudding of cake and fruit. Of course, my four-year-old always goes for a jam sandwich and ends up with a very sweet tea 4 days a week. The school says they offer carrot sticks etc, however, not one single parent has ever mentioned this in conversation and so I just think it’s something they say but don’t provide.

We do talk at home about the importance of a balanced diet, but she’s still only four and temptation is there! She’s offered something a bit more nutritionally balanced she gets home, but she’s usually just full of jam sandwich!

I emailed the school to ask them if they are able to comment on this or if they ever review the food that they provide at wraparound care, but I haven’t received a reply. AIBU to push this further?

OP posts:
drhf · 18/10/2025 11:36

OP, of course you're not being unreasonable. The school conceal what they offer at the after-school club because they know it's inadequate and will disappoint parents. I would be really annoyed too. The attitude here that you shouldn't complain and should be grateful for what you're given is bizarre.

Pre-schoolers should not be eating jam or cake before bed: www.nhs.uk/baby/weaning-and-feeding/what-to-feed-young-children/

Jam with no added sugar is still processed in such a way that the high sugar content is much more harmful than in fresh fruit. Plus some "sugar-free" jam contains artificial sweeteners.

Refer the school to the NHS page and encourage them to withdraw the jam and cake, and replace these with healthy snacks.

ChimpanzeeThatMonkeyNews · 18/10/2025 11:34

Junebrick · 18/10/2025 11:31

I wouldn't be happy with this either. I feel like I can never enjoy something sweet at home with my children because every playgroup or relative is giving them out. Jam sandwich and cakes arent healthy options for a school to provide in a society where 1 in 3 children are overweight.

Never??

Growlybear83 · 18/10/2025 11:34

Good grief - generations of children grew up into healthy adults having eaten jam sandwiches for tea! It was always the most common sandwich when I went to tea with any of my friends as a young child. I think you’re overreacting massively.

JoBrandsCleaner · 18/10/2025 11:33

PrioritisePleasure24 · 18/10/2025 10:17

And then the evil that is Nutella !!

Now you’re just going too far..

Junebrick · 18/10/2025 11:31

I wouldn't be happy with this either. I feel like I can never enjoy something sweet at home with my children because every playgroup or relative is giving them out. Jam sandwich and cakes arent healthy options for a school to provide in a society where 1 in 3 children are overweight.

ChimpanzeeThatMonkeyNews · 18/10/2025 11:31

I love a jam sandwich.

I once heard a nutritionist/dietician, whatever they were say: jam on a couple of slices of bread is good for this, that, and the other.

So, a jam sandwich, then, mate?

Charlize43 · 18/10/2025 11:30

Bread & Jam (made from fruit!) was probably the staple of most families in the 1930s & 40s.

I think she will survive.

ChimpanzeeThatMonkeyNews · 18/10/2025 11:30

You are being unreasonable for using the phrase ‘wraparound care’.
Somewhat unreasonably, i bloody hate it.

olympicsrock · 18/10/2025 11:29

A proper flounce OP

MrsDoubtfire1 · 18/10/2025 11:26

Why not just make sure she has a really good teeth cleaning regime.

Hankunamatata · 18/10/2025 11:25

Do you pay much?

Usually wrap around run by a school is on a shoe string budget by the time they paid their staff and other bills

dottiedodah · 18/10/2025 11:25

Simply loads! Packed with B vitamins and B12.rich in minerals Iron. Selenium. Potassium and magnesium.spread thinly to avoid too much salt it is excellent. Yummy 😋

TheKeatingFive · 18/10/2025 11:25

And I expect Marmite would be far in excess of any school guidelines around salt.

TheKeatingFive · 18/10/2025 11:24

dottiedodah · 18/10/2025 11:19

Surely their teeth though Keating five.A little under 5 filling up on jam sarnies can't be good.MM is full of B vitamins and a little scrape .not loads as salty would be better

It's probably low sugar jam though, to be fair

outofofficeagain · 18/10/2025 11:22

Pretty sure Marmite isn’t allowed because of salt content anyway.

these are the ingredients in dairylea.

skimmed MILK (water, skimmed MILK powder), CHEESE, inulin, MILK fat, whey powder (from MILK), skimmed MILK powder, emulsifying salts (triphosphate, polyphosphates), MILKprotein, calcium phosphate, acidity regulator (citric acid).

school guidelines are around variety of foods offered and balance across the day. Sugar is to be ‘avoided’ and there is specific guidelines on breakfast cereal, but jam is definitely not forbidden, especially if it’s offered alongside cheese and ham.

Squigglydums · 18/10/2025 11:22

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 08:33

Because it’s the only school in the area that doesn’t just tell you what food they provide.

But they told you what they provide? You sound like hard work tbh

dottiedodah · 18/10/2025 11:19

Surely their teeth though Keating five.A little under 5 filling up on jam sarnies can't be good.MM is full of B vitamins and a little scrape .not loads as salty would be better

Istilldontlikeolives · 18/10/2025 11:19

I really want a jam sandwich now.

isitmyturn · 18/10/2025 11:17

It will be white sliced bread and margarine, processed ham or plastic cheese.
If you don't want your child to eat these things and don't want to send your own food then you will have to teach your child to make choices you approve of.

TheKeatingFive · 18/10/2025 11:14

dottiedodah · 18/10/2025 11:11

Really? My DC loved Dairylea .and would have a thin spread of MM. I Would be worried about their teeth tTBH. There is very little nutrition in jam.esp the cheaper kind.

I doubt there's any more nutrition in a dairylea triangle, those things are extremely processed.

MayaPinion · 18/10/2025 11:12

How much are you paying for ASC? These places are usually run on a shoestring. You might be better paying for a childminder so you can ensure you DD eats in line with your preferences.

Ellie1015 · 18/10/2025 11:11

A cheese sandwich would fill her as much as a jam sandwich, she is full from the bread not the jam.

I would move dinner a little later so she eats it.

Yanbu to make suggestion, but they dont have to take up your suggestion either. If you really cant deal with it look for alternative after school care. But if happy with everything else i would let this go.

dottiedodah · 18/10/2025 11:11

Really? My DC loved Dairylea .and would have a thin spread of MM. I Would be worried about their teeth tTBH. There is very little nutrition in jam.esp the cheaper kind.

PorridgeWithSaltOrSugar · 18/10/2025 11:10

Ok OP. Think about it. How much money do you pay for this afterschool service? It's pretty cheap, right? Think about how much staff work there, wages etc. Jam sandwiches are cheap and easy to prepare. You're paying for the most basic childcare there is. You get what you pay for. If you are worried about nutrition then you're going to need to up the childcare bill and pay for a nanny or childminder.

Slightyamusedandsilly · 18/10/2025 11:10

JBeanGarden · 18/10/2025 08:24

Ideally one of the cheese or ham ones they offer. Plus the cake. Jam is not in the same category in my eyes. It’s also a direct contradiction of their own policy!

This is the case with most school food to be honest. None of it good quality or nutritious.

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