WIBTA if I refuse to cater for my ‘vegan’ MIL?

What about doing a roast veg traybake...something like this..rather than doing all the veg twice https://www.easypeasyfoodie.com/easy-christmas-vegetable-traybake/

She is a vegan/vegetarian.
It can be difficult to stick with a vegan diet.
Of course you should make an effort to cook something she wants, even if it is a microwave job.
I don't understand why you would make this fuss.

I like my friends too much to inflict that on them.

I don't mind eating in a vegan household. I know that it will be a vegan meal. They don't pander to my eating style.
That's the weird thing really. Going to my vegan friends' house they won't do any extra for me.

If you are going to the trouble of providing vegan food, make sure you snatch away any cream, or cheese, or other non-vegan treats that she might reach for.

No chocolates unless warranted dairy free.

Yes, lots of ovens are double ovens so not that uncommon. We actually have 2 completely separate ovens as I’m vegan so my oven never has animal products in it.

I wouldn’t eat a vegan meal. It’s Christmas bloody dinner! Why spoil it for everyone else for the sake of one person?!

I was vegetarian for 33 years, went vegan two years ago. I completely understand the hassle this causes other people and feel bad about it. My take is that I am vegan unless it is really socially awkward and would make someone feel uncomfortable.

As in, if I went to someone's house and they had made something for me and used honey I would just eat it and not saying anything. When I was vegetarian it happened a lot with people making me something then adding parmesan, which isn't vegetarian. So I would eat it because I didn't want to make a fuss and cause someone else to feel bad who was obviously trying to cater for me.

I would never, ever discuss my food and lifestyle choices with anyone though unless they happen to ask, and I would never dream of trying to impose my beliefs on anyone else.

So..I would make some effort for her but if she is going on about it and trying to impose her values on you, I wouldn't go all out! On the other hand, maple syrup or brown sugar is a really easy swap for honey and I think is far nicer anyway so might be an easy win.

I would stay at home if I was served a vegan Xmas dinner. No thank you and I eat very little meat.

I wouldn't cook an entire separate vegan dish for them - I'd do a vegan meal for everyone. I once catered for DPs family, nine of us, one vegan. We all ate vegan food. Twice. Noone died.

It sounds like lots of OPs food will include animal products so more difficult than you’re saying. I’m vegan so definitely in favour of people being vegan, but I can understand the annoyance of changing foods or preparing extra foods for someone who may end up just eating the other stuff because they’re not actually vegan.

Very few people I know have a second oven. We don't either.

OK, sorry. Yes we have a double oven. Not that unusual is it? I suggested putting the vegan stuff in a separate oven to the meat in case people worried about spatter.

I am not vegetarian but I do my best to provide something everyone can eat when there is a get together

Oh I'd never invite one, I just meant if one turned up by accident.

Obvious jokes aside, if I invited someone I knew to be vegan for food I'd sort them something.

But in a situation like the one OP describes, there's no way I'd be doing a separate version of multiple dishes for a pretend vegan.

To be fair, if I was cooking a chilli, curry, pasta or whatever for friends, I don't think I'd be doing and entire vegan version of the same dish for one person.

We have one vegan friend in our group who usually takes her own food to BBQs, parties etc as she doesn't want to put people out, which I think is polite of her.

Second oven?

Don't pander to it. Don't waste too much time A microwave meal, some vegetables and a dessert from m&s. Let her eat whatever she likes on the day.

Some people can be so mean spirited, why bother to host people at all if you're going to be nasty to them?

Yes but how hard is it to bung a Quorn steak , or whatever, in the second oven and cook the potatoes in olive oil.

yes. if she asked for vegan i would serve her vegan food. things like duck fat etc are not even vegetarian. she may be transitioning or thought some options were out of her co trol. just be kind and accommodate instead of judging her.

I don't know anyone who doesn't make meat dripping gravy with a roast.

I don't bother with duck fat for potatoes but I have done goose fat ones at Christmas now and then.

Duck or goose fat potatoes are pretty mainstream, you can buy the fat in most supermarkets.It gives lovely results. But it's easy enough to use olive oil instead if you are entertaining a vegetarian.

I think OP just isn’t keen on going to extra effort for someone who might end up eating the non vegan foods, which is fair enough.

Also, put Gavin and Stacey on when Pam pretends to be veg

Agave nectar on carrots and parsnips is just as good actually. Or maple syrup, though that is quite strong. Maybe try them out in advance to see if you like it?

I'd do her a vegan nut thing, adapt the carrots etc and do her a small separate tray of roast spuds, but if no oven room, she would be given boiled spuds instead I'm afraid. Having said that, I prefer roasties done with a really posh rape seed oil anyway myself.

Buy a ready made dessert. I cater for vegans quite a bit, and I don't mind if they scoff a non vegan item now and then. They don't mind if they don't have 100% home made food. I try to keep tools etc separate but they wouldn't know if I slipped up a bit (obviously if it was an allergy I'd be a lot more careful).

I am veggie and I have to bring my own food to xmases that my brother and his family host