Holidays with young kids just not worth it? Holiday from hell incoming…

But this kid obviously doesn’t.

Edit to add we don’t do all inclusive holidays as it doesn’t suit my children and their needs. That’s the point.

This won’t help but I can’t help but wonder why you thought going away was a good idea!

The whole ‘bunging the kids in the kids club rather than spend time with them’ judgement is comedy.

My kids have always been really sociable and enjoy playing with other kids, each other and other adults.

At most they have done maybe 3 kids club sessions over a week. Usually one or two plus a kids disco. Our last holiday they did one 2 hour session and loved it but we were too busy to fit another in.

Bare in mind that on a day on holiday with young kids that could be - up at 7am for playing with toys and heading down to breakfast, breakfast until 9am playing and chatting and interacting, 9-10 in the pool with both parents as 2 kids, quick change and

11-2 out for lunch and a walk around local town running round the square, seeing some sights.

2-4 - kids club for crafting session and arranged treasure hunt game and dance club in aircon kids club to avoid heat of midday.

4-5 - back into pool or down to beach jumping over waves/ on pedals etc or both parents in pool playing with balls and playing games

5-6 - back to the room to get ready so one parent playing with toys on the balcony with them

6- 8.30 - playing uno, chatting eating and running around at disco

Are you honestly judging these parents for a kids club session? Lots of kids love kids club and ask to go. It’s a long day with kids on a holiday and many enjoy other kids company and some activities out of the heat of the sun.

It’s not worth it. It’s no holiday when it’s hard work. Much easier to be at home.

Quality time with your family while your kids in kids club?

I just think you’ve chosen the wrong type of holiday for your families needs.

I travel alot on my own with my 4 young children ( all under 9 ) , one has combined ADHD and has trouble in certain areas and running off etc.
Firstly id never do kids club , I dont understand why ppl go on a family holiday then leave there kids with strangers in a kids club to sit by the pool. Where is the 9 month old? While ur sat on the loungers? If that was my child , my child would b kicking off like why have I got to stay here with strangers but my siblings dont.
Bottom line, sitting in restaurants eating, putting kids in kids club esp ND children is unrealistic for kids this age. Its so boring for them , so u will notice more challenging behaviour.

Ppl ask me all the time how I manage it, its because we never stay in the hotel n from morning to night we are out busy, as soon as the boredom kicks in, theres meltdowns everywhere so avoid them at all costs. Im ok with the fact wen they r older I can have relaxing holidays to myself. But for now our holidays are tailored around the kids.

Give the partner what he is going to do with DS tomorrow! Don't let him sit back give him instructions! Unless he's told how and what needs doing he's off the hook! ?

Hey OP, I'd suggest getting some reins so DS can't just race off. Lots of good suggestions by other posters re food etc, I'd be very concerned that he escaped from the kid's club. The door should absolutely be secure, definitely follow that up if you can? Hopefully you guys can get to enjoy the rest of your holiday 😊

I’ve been on a 2-3 hols a year with a 12MO and a 2 YO since they were both a few months old.

2 almost 3 YO is autistic and constantly runs / ants in pants / screams flaps bounces. But, he LOVES water and loves the park, sea, beach etc. I have found that holidays are definitely different, and focused on the LO’s, but you can definitely have an enjoyable holiday.

i appreciate it’s all inclusive but can you take LO to a local park, let them swim in the pool for a few hours, things to burn off the energy?

and with regards to food, I think you have to be a little lax. I’m quite strict generally, not a lot of sugar, 5-7 fruit and veg a day, dairy, etc etc. but on holiday I let them eat chips every dinner if they want, ice cream every day, it’s everyone’s holiday not just mine! Can you buy some toddler appropriate snacks from
the supermarket to avoid that again?

Absolutely this!

Having read your update I think you should just go back to the hotel in Turkey until they grow out of it. It sounds perfect. The familiarity might help too.

Oh I company understand all of this.
We have just come back from 10 nights in Majorca. Whilst it was great to be together as a family it was HARD. My DDs are 5 & 3 and they were fab. 5 y/o spent all her time in the pool 3 y/o loves to relax on a lounger and people watch. But my DS is 2 and he was absolutely wild. Ran everywhere, slipped on the tiles so many times. He would never fully settle doing one thing e.g. he would want to go in the pool but he would be out after 5 mins then want back in... repeat 40x.
He refused to go in a highchair for meals and insisted he sat on my knee. Wouldn't let me go anywhere alone. Constantly ran away at the entertainment at night. Parts of it were a living nightmare but there were moments of joy and great memories.

My only advice is to ignore onlookers. Unless their feeding the baby or chasing your son around they can bog off. We have all been there so they can just remind themselves of that before shooting judgemental looks.

Could you speak with the restaurant and prebook his meal so its on the table for arriving?

Kids club security needs addressing urgently. It doesn't bear thinking about what might have happened if you weren't nearby!

Focus on things your little one enjoys and engages with. Holidays can be really overwhelming for children (and adults!) His brain is maybe ping ponging around with all the fun and stimulation that his body is just doing what it needs to do to regulate that.
Is there an open space you can take him to so he can run wild?!

My husband is much the same as yours, it worked best for me to put his feelings in a box at the back of my brain and focus on the kids. Worrying about his feelings isnt on your to-do list. He is an adult and needs to address them himself.

I really hope in a few days time everything will calm down and the excitement and adrenaline wears off a bit for you to have an enjoyable time!
Good luck! X

I can completely see that if a child has additional needs the last thing I would want is to make a parent in this position feel rubbish. I guess I was just wondering because additional needs don’t seem to be a given here and while I know it’s a possibility I would be wary of assuming. I know my own DS was a bit of a nightmare aged 2-3!

Respectfully this entirely depends on the child. I've had a child exactly as you describe. And another who needs these things until much older to be safe. My youngest's autism diagnosis came at primary school. He is no more autistic after diagnosis than before. What changed is people starting to realise we did things differently because we needed to. We had all these kind of comments in the toddler years especially and it's horrendous.

OP is best placed to decide what her child needs.

Holidays with small children are just a case of same shit, different place - without all your usual equipment / setup that you’d have at home to make life easier. We self-catered in the UK for years (we also had food allergies to deal with) - you’re control of the food, you have a lot more space than just a hotel room, and you can pack up the car with all the conveniences that make life easier. Have you considered CenterParcs or similar?

This is true. I was referred by the HV.

OP holidays at 2-3 yrs old mark were completely hourrendous even in the nicest 5* settings. But it gets easier, I promise.

My gp also told us the school has to refer until I was told otherwise by the autism assessment team once we were finally diagnosed. Pls don’t wait for school push for assessment yourself. It could save you years in waiting.

We're just got back from Malta with a 4 and 1 year old and I wouldn't call it a holiday. I didn't have 1 hour to myself as we sort of had a child each. I think until the children are older holidays are more for them than us. So I went into it not expecting too much. I found a kids club that would allow you to leave a child from 4 (most are 5) but my daughter didn't like it.
Next year we're stopping in the UK and doing a camping holiday.

Do you think you might be ‘babying’ your DS a bit? I don’t mean that to sound horrible, but we are a year ahead of you - my DS is nearly five and we have a just turned two year old (in the same age as you as well!)

Honestly, the idea of this time last year ds being in a buggy or a high chair or using reins would not have crossed my mind. I guess I’m wondering that if he’s always contained or attempted to be he’s always got something to battle against, to me those things are very much things that are slowly phased out at 2, not for a nearly four year old.

Cue someone diagnosing your kids with ADHD or autism....

I have to say that we just didn't bother, and we only had one DC, but having said that we do live in Cornwall so did lots of holiday things.

When DS was 3 we went on a two week holiday to France and I can honestly say I was about 100 times more stressed at the end of it than I was at the beginning. We tried again when DS was about 6 and it was a bit better, but we didn't really begin to enjoy holidays until DS was about 9

I’ve put YABU because it seems like you booked a holiday with what you/DH need in mind “relaxing on loungers” etc., and I think the idea of that when you have young children is unrealistic. I think you need to change your mindset to think about what your DS wants from a holiday because then it just makes it easier for everyone.

Having not long ago from a similar holiday (where ds4 and dd2 left the hotel to go to one across the road - a service road - to a playground) I a) feel you; and b) realise security is paramount!