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Original poster

Conséquence?

33 replies

DisplayRabbit · 17/10/2025 14:48

What kind of consequence would you give an 11-year-old who makes fun of his 7-year-old brother for still using a booster seat in the car, when he doesn’t?

OP posts:
Original poster
DisplayRabbit · 17/10/2025 15:12

parietal · 17/10/2025 15:09

can you make the 11 year old sit on the booster seat for a short journey?

[actually, that is a very bad idea and associates the booster seat with punishment].

there are good suggestions above to (a) say no that is unacceptable immediately and (b) talk over why it is cruel to say something that makes your brother cry at a later point.

Also, you could have a treat system for good behaviour in the car, either getting to choose some music for everyone to listen to or get a treat at the end of the journey or similar.

Well, he actually needs one he’s not yet at the ideal size but I’ve already tried explaining it to him and nothing works. He just doesn’t want a booster. To quote him, “None of my friends have one, and boosters always smell.”

OP posts:
parietal · 17/10/2025 15:09

can you make the 11 year old sit on the booster seat for a short journey?

[actually, that is a very bad idea and associates the booster seat with punishment].

there are good suggestions above to (a) say no that is unacceptable immediately and (b) talk over why it is cruel to say something that makes your brother cry at a later point.

Also, you could have a treat system for good behaviour in the car, either getting to choose some music for everyone to listen to or get a treat at the end of the journey or similar.

Original poster
DisplayRabbit · 17/10/2025 15:04

TeenLifeMum · 17/10/2025 14:53

I’d have a conversation about bullying never being acceptable and how we treat each other in our family. But then that’s more my style than what I see as meaningless consequences.

During the incident: a firm “absolutely not, you don’t speak to your brother like that!”
Later when emotions are calm: conversation

Edited

Yeah, but I get the feeling he doesn’t really care. He’d actually need a booster too he’s still small but he’s been so difficult lately that I decided to take it away. Otherwise it would be constant tantrums; he feels like a little kid when he’s in it. His booster is just sitting in the garage.

OP posts:
verycloakanddaggers · 17/10/2025 15:01

This is bullying. Have you given him a serious talking to and told him it is completely unacceptable?

Original poster
DisplayRabbit · 17/10/2025 14:56

TeenLifeMum · 17/10/2025 14:53

I’d have a conversation about bullying never being acceptable and how we treat each other in our family. But then that’s more my style than what I see as meaningless consequences.

During the incident: a firm “absolutely not, you don’t speak to your brother like that!”
Later when emotions are calm: conversation

Edited

I don’t understand why my son does this. He’s always hated booster seats, and neither have his friends. The other day he even sniffed his brother’s car seat in front of him and said it “smelled like a baby,” which made his little brother start crying.

OP posts:
Original poster
DisplayRabbit · 17/10/2025 14:54

Sorry, I’m trying to improve my English I meant more like a consequence, not really a punishment. I don’t like that word.

OP posts:
TeenLifeMum · 17/10/2025 14:53

I’d have a conversation about bullying never being acceptable and how we treat each other in our family. But then that’s more my style than what I see as meaningless consequences.

During the incident: a firm “absolutely not, you don’t speak to your brother like that!”
Later when emotions are calm: conversation

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 17/10/2025 14:50

I would simply tell them to stop. Unless I've misunderstood the meaning of "Conséquence" as my French isn't very good.

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