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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To find salary offered an insult?

508 replies

Willowtree5 · 16/10/2025 14:20

As part of a restructure, I have been asked if I would take on three direct reports (I currently don’t manage anyone, but have in the past - big pull of current role was no line management responsibility).

I said I’d consider it - whilst I know I can manage people, it does add to my workload and the ‘mental load’ of dealing with all the crap around sickness/absence, 1:1’s etc.

My manager said she’d establish what additional uplift to my salary would be possible and let me know.

They’ve come back with an offer of £125,000 (current salary pre bonuses £105,000) which I find frankly insulting given the workload this would add.

AIBU to tell them to stuff it?

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 16/10/2025 16:21

LooseCanyon · 16/10/2025 16:19

What is wrong with having a high opinion of oneself?

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I think it depends how you express it. There's nothing wrong with high self esteem but she's been scathing towards those doing what she seems to perceive as lesser jobs.

nellly · 16/10/2025 16:20

£20K is a fair compensation for the faff in my opinion but if you don’t think it’s worth to negotiate for more, or to lessen your existing workload or just say no thanks 🤷🏻‍♀️ don’t get hung up on someone who would do it for 20p elsewhere it’s not relevant

HelloCanYouHearMe · 16/10/2025 16:20

Willowtree5 · 16/10/2025 15:19

More fool you for not asserting yourself and negotiating for a fair deal.

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Your responses to people highlighting lower annual salaries/increments makes you sound like a bit of a twat OP

MasterBeth · 16/10/2025 16:20

LooseCanyon · 16/10/2025 16:15

Would OP's company be able to take on a manager at £20,000 to manage a team? No.

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It's obviously not going to be a full-time role "managing" a team of... three!

SadOldLadyOfTheLowlands · 16/10/2025 16:20

Ionlymakejokestodistractmyself · 16/10/2025 16:04

Judging from your OP and subsequent replies, no I don't think you should take on the line management responsibility.

Totally agree

plsdontsitthere · 16/10/2025 16:19

sosorryimnotsorry · 16/10/2025 14:40

Nobody needs over £100k sorry YABU. I would expect anyone over £100k to be having huge responsibilities including managing people. You are just being greedy

Gutter mentality, we should ALL be demanding more from employers who laugh while they hoard the profits.

LooseCanyon · 16/10/2025 16:19

ilovesooty · 16/10/2025 16:17

She seems to have a high opinion of herself and has been pretty rude to some people on this thread.

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What is wrong with having a high opinion of oneself?

SadOldLadyOfTheLowlands · 16/10/2025 16:19

£633 more a month on a basic normal salary with no pensions etc

105 - monthly takehome - 5,871.45
125 - monthly takehome - 6,504.79

To find salary offered an insult?
Cosyblankets · 16/10/2025 16:19

You didn't want to manage and you feel the increase is an insult so it seems straightforward to me.
Not sure why you posted

Crummles1 · 16/10/2025 16:18

@Andprettygood Indeed

ilovesooty · 16/10/2025 16:17

LooseCanyon · 16/10/2025 16:10

Why the rolleyes? OP clearly has skill that is valued, managing people doesn't need to be part of that.

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She seems to have a high opinion of herself and has been pretty rude to some people on this thread.

MagnaICe · 16/10/2025 16:16

Rumpledandcrumpled · 16/10/2025 16:13

Really? It’s a 20 percent increase, I think it’s reasonable.

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Don't you see she has the brain of a nail tech . I'm taking the micky

cadburyegg · 16/10/2025 16:16

Yabu op and that’s coming from another single parent, your circumstances are largely irrelevant to your employer. If you aren’t interested in the job that’s fine.

mumto2teenagers · 16/10/2025 16:16

It seems like a reasonable amount. What figure were you expecting? Assuming your bonus is calculated as a % then that will also increase.

I guess only you can decide whether an additional £20k is worth the extra responsibilty and can always decline the offer if you decide it isn't worth it.

Andprettygood · 16/10/2025 16:16

Willowtree5 · 16/10/2025 15:19

More fool you for not asserting yourself and negotiating for a fair deal.

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So have you asserted yourself @Willowtree5 ?

Have you tried to negotiate a better deal?

Or have you just started a mumsnet thread about how insulted you are?

LooseCanyon · 16/10/2025 16:15

Rumpledandcrumpled · 16/10/2025 16:13

Really? It’s a 20 percent increase, I think it’s reasonable.

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Would OP's company be able to take on a manager at £20,000 to manage a team? No.

Rumpledandcrumpled · 16/10/2025 16:13

MagnaICe · 16/10/2025 16:13

Don't take it. Yes, it's an insult.

Really? It’s a 20 percent increase, I think it’s reasonable.

MagnaICe · 16/10/2025 16:13

Don't take it. Yes, it's an insult.

thisfilmisboring123 · 16/10/2025 16:12

Ionlymakejokestodistractmyself · 16/10/2025 16:04

Judging from your OP and subsequent replies, no I don't think you should take on the line management responsibility.

😂😂😂

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 16/10/2025 16:10

I'd do some careful maths on this. On the one hand, it pushes you into a banding where you lose other reliefs so what's the take home. Employers will be aware of this so you do have the opportunity to illustrate why you can't take the hit.

On the other hand, it's +£20k on your base which will increase your employer pension contributions and increase your bonus which is typically calculated as a % of gross salary so there are other hidden benefits.

Lastly, while you can up and go easily it would appear, is the next step on your career require line mgmt in which case there are other progressions. But if you don't want to manage people long term and specialist roles are common then a polite decline is fine, but will mark your card.

ReyRey12 · 16/10/2025 16:10

I do not think 20k increase is an insult. You might be able to ask for a bit more. If it is not worth it, that is fine. I'm assuming this is a middle management role so in my experience, in those positions the salary is not significantly bigger than regular working bees. That's why c-suite are able to get the big bucks

LooseCanyon · 16/10/2025 16:10

ilovesooty · 16/10/2025 16:08

According to her she'd walk into another job with no difficulty 🙄

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Why the rolleyes? OP clearly has skill that is valued, managing people doesn't need to be part of that.

ilovesooty · 16/10/2025 16:08

Seelybe · 16/10/2025 14:54

@Willowtree5 if you say no might they make you redundant and re-advertise the post to include the line management? And if so could you easily get another job at equivalent salary without a line management element?

According to her she'd walk into another job with no difficulty 🙄

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 16/10/2025 16:05

Willowtree5 · 16/10/2025 14:45

If I’m made redundant I’ll get a sizeable pay out and walk into a similar role, so that really doesn’t bother me.

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If you are confident id take the money and walk.
I'm in IC roles and they are in many ways preferable vs line mabngenent roles (I moved into IC for more £££ having come from managing a team of about 20)

C8H10N4O2 · 16/10/2025 16:04

FriedFalafels · 16/10/2025 15:59

The problem with people comparing here is that we don’t know OP’s sector or role.

The other main issue is the salary bracket here. Whilst £20k sounds a lot, you start losing the personal allowance. The net difference is £633 per month. This is £146 per week and less than £4 per hour to deal with all the grief being a manager brings. I can see why she’s not happy

The notional 60% only applies if you are tapping into all the salary sacrifice schemes and have already maxed out your pension contributions. It is still the stepping stone to the next salary rung.

The salary hike is what it is - 20k. If the OP doesn’t want it they are entitled to tell them to stuff it but if you want to progress, at some point you have to bite it and work through to the next level. It is still a substantial salary by any standards.

My middle managers are about this level - I’ve yet to have one turn down the promotion because their proportional tax (after maxing out pensions at 40% tax relief) is too onerous.