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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find salary offered an insult?

508 replies

Willowtree5 · 16/10/2025 14:20

As part of a restructure, I have been asked if I would take on three direct reports (I currently don’t manage anyone, but have in the past - big pull of current role was no line management responsibility).

I said I’d consider it - whilst I know I can manage people, it does add to my workload and the ‘mental load’ of dealing with all the crap around sickness/absence, 1:1’s etc.

My manager said she’d establish what additional uplift to my salary would be possible and let me know.

They’ve come back with an offer of £125,000 (current salary pre bonuses £105,000) which I find frankly insulting given the workload this would add.

AIBU to tell them to stuff it?

OP posts:
TorroFerney · 16/10/2025 18:18

Horserider5678 · 16/10/2025 14:55

I earn a similar salary to you and manage 25 staff 🤦‍♀️

I earn £95k and manage six. It’s almost like people get paid differently depending on what job they do isn’t it!

InjuryMyArse · 16/10/2025 18:17

The DNHS, eh? Tattle a bit quiet, op?

LooseCanyon · 16/10/2025 18:17

usernamealreadytaken · 16/10/2025 18:15

Unless he’s no longer alive, perhaps you should fix that.

Such a shitty thing to say.

AmIHumanOrAmIAYeti · 16/10/2025 18:16

YourPeppyAmberTraybake · 16/10/2025 14:28

I think it sounds a really decent rise and it could lead to career progression.

My DH managed 150 people and earned 185k including his bonus.

I bet he didn’t line manage 150 people……..

usernamealreadytaken · 16/10/2025 18:15

Willowtree5 · 16/10/2025 16:02

No

Unless he’s no longer alive, perhaps you should fix that.

Wexone · 16/10/2025 18:15

Firstly we haven't been told what industry OP is in so we don't know the rate she should be paid
Secondly everyone knows each industry is different - wages vary vastly across the board
I earn 80k i have no one reporting into me, my job is heavily involved in regulation and making sure things are complaint. My boss has three people reporting into him, including me, i know he definitely doesnt earn 120k he earns more than that plus bonus. And you know what he rightly so deserves it. He covers two vastly different areas, knows the system inside out always there for help and support and works every hour.
My Sis has 5 people report into her, has to travel alot and works long hours and she only earns 5k more than me, i think she is underpayed for the stress she deals with
Op i dont think its worth it however the concern would be the restructuring for me, would you be made redundant? can you renegotiate the increase? can you bench mark your role

ExposedCankles · 16/10/2025 18:14

YANBU to say no considering the tax implications etc.

YABU to describe it as insulting to a bunch of people from presumably every walk of life on here. Describe as such to your friends in your own bubble but pretty crass to describe a £20k pay rise as insulting for lots of people who are trying to get by on much less. Not cool.

Jc2001 · 16/10/2025 18:13

Willowtree5 · 16/10/2025 14:20

As part of a restructure, I have been asked if I would take on three direct reports (I currently don’t manage anyone, but have in the past - big pull of current role was no line management responsibility).

I said I’d consider it - whilst I know I can manage people, it does add to my workload and the ‘mental load’ of dealing with all the crap around sickness/absence, 1:1’s etc.

My manager said she’d establish what additional uplift to my salary would be possible and let me know.

They’ve come back with an offer of £125,000 (current salary pre bonuses £105,000) which I find frankly insulting given the workload this would add.

AIBU to tell them to stuff it?

If you really can command that sort of salary and think you're worth a lot more if you line manage, then tell them you'll walk away unless they improve the offer significantly.
.
Your posts do come across as goady. If you have that much confidence in your ability (and good for you) why are you seeking validation on Mumsnet when you know many people on here won't earn anywhere near that sort of money.

So just get on with it and tell them to fuck off if you think it's an insult.

Viviennemary · 16/10/2025 18:12

Nobody on here knows if you are worth more money. The percentage rise is fairly high so I don'treally know why you are complaining.

NotsosunnyShropshire · 16/10/2025 18:11

There seems to be a lot of jealousy that the OP has a job that pays well. I assume they worked and/or studied hard to get that role. They also appear to know their own worth.

@Willowtree5, if your job will remain safe, turn it down. If your job relies on this, take it and start applying elsewhere in the meantime.

Boysnme · 16/10/2025 18:09

An extra £20k / 19% to take on line management is a very good increase and way more than I’d be offered by my private sector decent paying employer.

However the fact that you seem insulted by it would make me assume you do not think it’s a good offer and therefore you should turn it down. Also consider what you are going to do with it - if it’s all going into your pension then it’s a genuine £20k increase to you future but if not your tax will be high on it.

cosmicbabe · 16/10/2025 18:07

Jesus I not only Like Manager 25 people I’m a Head in the business and don’t earn near to that!

YourPeppyAmberTraybake · 16/10/2025 18:06

If you don’t want to progress further in your career with this company then decline the job. If you want the challenge and the stepping stone to earning 140k plus then accept it.

Zov · 16/10/2025 18:05

Well, I took a payrise of just £29,000 earlier this year, in another department, with an extra 6 mile round trip to work. I went from £333,000 a year to £362,000 a year. So I'm on the fence.

Willowtree5 · 16/10/2025 18:05

For those asking, I work in the finance industry.

OP posts:
MoominMai · 16/10/2025 18:02

Zeborah · 16/10/2025 17:03

That’s a reasonable offer. In the public sector you would just be expected to do it

I was thinking that. I recently got a promotion to a higher grade in the Civil Service and a big part of me applying was there was no foreseeable LM duties. But there’s talk of a slight restructure also where those of a similar grade to me have been told it may result in some of us being asked to LM 1-2 staff. I am of course mortified 😅 but will have to suck it up along with my existing workload. You’re just expected to more effectively prioritise and time manage and reach out for support ad hoc. You certainly don’t get offered monetary recompense for it though - but I guess that’s why so many professional people choose private sector over public, the pay is always better and little perks like this obviously come into play.

PumpkinSparkleFairy · 16/10/2025 18:01

I’d most likely say no, as I don’t want to manage anyone.

I earn around £125k and don’t manage anyone thankfully!

Willowtree5 · 16/10/2025 18:00

ClarasSisters · 16/10/2025 17:29

Read the first few posts and was wondering if you were for real. Came to this one and realised nope, absolutely just being a goady fucker.

Humour me - why do people work for the DNHS then? As all you hear is about the crap conditions, low pay, understaffing etc. A passion job is exactly what it is.

OP posts:
angustifolia · 16/10/2025 17:58

If taxes mean the addition take-home isn't worth the headaches associated with being a manager—and you're not worried about holding this job, if they decide to find someone to take your place—it doesn't matter if the salary is insulting or not. (Unless you're so insulted that you want to leave immediately, which doesn't seem to be the case.)

You can simply reply that for reasons X,Y & Z, you're not interested. If you have a specific figure in mind, you could suggest as much, but since it's not something you particularly want to do, anyway, you can simply decline the offer and see what happens next.

24karatPalamino · 16/10/2025 17:57

So basically around £7.5K pay rise for managing extra staff or around £625 per month?

That still seems ok to me, but there again if you’re already earning £5700 a month then another £600 in London probably won’t feel like much.

You can either ask for more (but it would have to be a lot to make much of a difference) or just forget about it.

MajesticWhine · 16/10/2025 17:57

It’s not that bad to be insulting. Is it worth taking it for the sake of job security, positioning yourself well in the new structure and future career progression?

Hankunamatata · 16/10/2025 17:54

Insults a bit of a weird way to describe the offer. Surely its a starting point for negotiation

CryMyEyesViolet · 16/10/2025 17:48

That sounds like a fantastic deal. I get paid the same as your increased salary and also have 3 direct reports - it’s not a paid for extra though, I have both had reports and not had reports on this salary, as have my peers.

PaddlingSwan · 16/10/2025 17:46

Stick to your guns.
I was approached for a role today by 2 people from the same organisation. It is a project manager role, but they want me to go on the payroll at a net salary that is 66% below what I was earning last year.
I have 25+ years' experience and have managed multi-million € projects. Plus it is 5 days a week in the office, which is about an hour from my house.
I am letting the process continue for the moment as I suspect I am too experienced and over-qualified, so will probably not get to the interview stage.
A good friend of mine worked in a managerial role at IBM, she had 4 direct reports and did nothing else apart from manage them. I do not think she enjoyed it very much.

BoudiccaRuled · 16/10/2025 17:45

After tax increase... It's not worth unless you are scrabbling around frantically for school fees etc.