Page 3 | my university is allowing men to enter women's bathrooms changing rooms etc!

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 2025-10-16T12:26:32+00:00

I'm a student at this uni. I love it here, but it is a left leaning uni (as am I!) I should add, I'm quite slight and petite and am generally very nervous of men. Today, I got this email saying that they're letting people choose bathrooms or changing rooms based on "how they feel" and stated that whichever bathroom etc you want to use, you can enter in the name of inclusivity! I'm very open to gender identity etc. I'm bi, and I have friends of all gender identities. I have trans friends, those who don't conform to binaries, etc, and I respect them greatly. and I am completely okay with sharing the majority of bathrooms at the uni, as that doesn't both me. I personally don't understand how you can feel like something you are scientifically not, but you only live once so you might as well be your true self. but now I'm left wondering about gym changing rooms at the uni, as I'm not as okay with that. one does not have stalls and neither do the showers, so I'm expected to be be vulnerable in front of those who have genitalia which I don't want to see or be in bare in front of. this also opens up the chances that a guy could walk into women's changing rooms, watch, and cannot be challenged it also raises question of faith. it is not excluding women who cannot be naked in front of anyone but women (same goes for men). "just use the stalls, disabled loo etc" doesn't cut it as their isn't enough of those to go round and then those who actually need disabled toilets can't use them. I also want there to be a couple of women only bathrooms too, because it doesn't seem fair I'm being told men will be entering women's bathrooms and the uni supports this, but religious / personal wishes to be in women only spaces is being walked over. this is less about trans women entering these spaces, and more about harmful men entering them (although I don't want to see male gentalia in women's changing rooms full stop) I can't speak out or ask as I will be ostracised and it's not worth my future.

MrFluffyDogIsMyBestFriend · 16/10/2025 15:39

How would the university find out your identity?

You're just making this up. The giveaway was the life drawing...

Keeptoiletssafe · 16/10/2025 15:37

Which country in the uk as it would narrow it down to legislation. Are you from the uk? Stalls is not a phrase that’s used here normally. It really isn’t going to be a problem here if you name the university. If thousands got the same email, loads of people will feel the same as you. I can promise you there will be other women and men that won’t want this either.

JLou08 · 16/10/2025 15:30

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 13:31

uk, and I'm sorry but I really cannot name them as I risk unfair treatment. Some of my supervisors are LGBT themselves and would be very very upset if they got told of me reporting it

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University's have huge numbers. You wouldn't be identified by saying which uni you attend.

SirRaymondClench · 16/10/2025 15:27

Onekidnoclue · 16/10/2025 13:48

I don’t believe that. Though I totally understand your reasoning. I do believe though that the criteria for entry for a women’s only space needs to be significantly higher than “feeling like it at the time”.
id love to say I had a solution. That there’s some criteria that trans women could meet that gives them entry to women only spaces but I don’t know what that would be. I did share your “XX” view of womanhood and in someways I agree but I feel incredibly uncomfortable with the idea of a trans woman who has been living that way for decades post surgery etc being forced into the “men’s” space where they would be extremely vulnerable and the stats should that being a trans woman is far riskier than being a cis woman.

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Can you please link to these stats?

lcakethereforeIam · 16/10/2025 15:26

You could try creating a burner email and forwarding it to one of the journalists that reports on these stories. Janice Turner in the Times I think, Suzanne Moore for the Telegraph for starters.

SalonDesRefuses · 16/10/2025 15:20

Onekidnoclue · 16/10/2025 15:02

https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/press/ncvs-trans-press-release/

I guess there’s a debate about the language. Clearly trans women suffer violence and hate speech at a rate which is statistically significantly higher than cis women which is the point I was trying to make.
Im not debating that cis women are vulnerable and subject to physical violence and other assaults.
my concern is that transwomen are vulnerable and deserve protection and support. I’m not sure that allowing them into “women’s” spaces is the best way to afford them that protection but the alternative seems to me extremely cruel to a group which is demonstrably marginalised and vulnerable.

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The alternative doesn't need to be forcing trans women into male bathrooms. They should have male/female areas and mixed areas. Or single spaces.

Always 'cis' women who need to do all the compromising.

ShallWeDance · 16/10/2025 15:14

Not just yours OP. Universities all over are dragging their heals on the Supreme Court confirmation of the law.

SalonDesRefuses · 16/10/2025 15:12

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr · 16/10/2025 13:31

The use of the word "bathroom" makes it sound as though the university is not in the UK.

I'm UK and say bathroom. I know there's no bath in uni toilets, it's just habit.

OP I'd try to anonymously get the message across if you're frightened of being unfairly treated.

Between that and the changing room issue, your uni sounds awful!

Onekidnoclue · 16/10/2025 15:02

Whatifitallgoesright · 16/10/2025 14:54

"..being a trans woman is far riskier than being a cis woman."

Ha ha, nice try.

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https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/press/ncvs-trans-press-release/

I guess there’s a debate about the language. Clearly trans women suffer violence and hate speech at a rate which is statistically significantly higher than cis women which is the point I was trying to make.
Im not debating that cis women are vulnerable and subject to physical violence and other assaults.
my concern is that transwomen are vulnerable and deserve protection and support. I’m not sure that allowing them into “women’s” spaces is the best way to afford them that protection but the alternative seems to me extremely cruel to a group which is demonstrably marginalised and vulnerable.

Transgender people over four times more likely than cisgender people to be victims of violent crime

https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/press/ncvs-trans-press-release/

BallerinaRadio · 16/10/2025 14:57

VickyEadieofThigh · 16/10/2025 13:48

I find it remarkable that a "left-leaning" university is only just doing this, I have to say. I would've expected it to have been an action quite some time ago.

The law was clarified several months ago - so why suddenly decide to break it?

I'm as angrily GC as the next person with any sense, but forgive me for being sceptical about this thread.

Edited

Me too.

This 100% feels like a post aimed just to blow up and rile people.

It's been a while since we've had a thread like this though maybe the OP thought we were due one.

Any chance of a look at the letter OP?

Whatifitallgoesright · 16/10/2025 14:54

Onekidnoclue · 16/10/2025 13:48

I don’t believe that. Though I totally understand your reasoning. I do believe though that the criteria for entry for a women’s only space needs to be significantly higher than “feeling like it at the time”.
id love to say I had a solution. That there’s some criteria that trans women could meet that gives them entry to women only spaces but I don’t know what that would be. I did share your “XX” view of womanhood and in someways I agree but I feel incredibly uncomfortable with the idea of a trans woman who has been living that way for decades post surgery etc being forced into the “men’s” space where they would be extremely vulnerable and the stats should that being a trans woman is far riskier than being a cis woman.

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"..being a trans woman is far riskier than being a cis woman."

Ha ha, nice try.

Original poster

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 14:53

spannasaurus · 16/10/2025 14:25

Around 90% of transwomen retain their penis.

Prison statistics show that the percentage of transwomen in prison for sexual offences is higher than the percentage of non trans identifed men ( and of course significantly higher than women)

Obtaining a gender recognition certificate doesn't require that person to have had any surgery or take any hormones.

What criteria do suggest for allowing some men to use female single sex spaces?

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This too. I don’t want to see a “woman’s” penis while I’m getting changed in the changing rooms.
I’m really into live drawing and used to go a lot. Back then I used to draw a lot of trans women who still had penises and that setting I was absolutely fine with it!

OP posts:

Original poster

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 14:52

Wingedharpy · 16/10/2025 13:48

Are you sure it's a legitimate email and not from someone trying to wind you up?
Using facilities "based on how they feel"? - bonkers.
I do hope they'll be providing litter trays for those that feel like a cat today.

i thought it was a wind up until I saw the ac.uk email and that it came from multiple heads of department via a forwarded forward from the VC.

OP posts:

Original poster

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 14:51

HermioneWeasley · 16/10/2025 14:27

@whyyyyyisitmonddayy

trans women are just men. Men with a trans identity have a much higher rate if sex offending than men without so they’re not a safer demographic.

if the facilities are labelled for women then if they have a policy that people can use them based on their feelings, that is unlawful. If they claim to be sex segregated but do nothing to enforce it, it’s much harder.

as others have said, I would contact Sex Matters. You could also try writing to the university Chancellor explains they’re in breach of the Supreme Court judgment.

Thank you for the advice, I’ll see if there’s a way of covering my own back

OP posts:

Original poster

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 14:50

smallglassbottle · 16/10/2025 14:28

I've voted yabu because this is what leftists want and you're a leftist. Unfortunately, the rest of us have to live with it as well.

Unfortunately being leftist doesn’t mean you agree with every single policy. If I say I’m right in betraying my other sentiments. I agree with 80% of leftist sentiment. You’re never going to completely politically align with something

OP posts:

Rainbowshine · 16/10/2025 14:49

Your university must have a route for reporting matters that would fall under Whisteblowing, or Public Interest Disclosures, on their website as anyone should be able to report non compliance concerns, and be able to do so anonymously. It’ll be where they have the website terms and conditions and modern slavery statement etc.

Original poster

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 14:48

VickyEadieofThigh · 16/10/2025 13:48

I find it remarkable that a "left-leaning" university is only just doing this, I have to say. I would've expected it to have been an action quite some time ago.

The law was clarified several months ago - so why suddenly decide to break it?

I'm as angrily GC as the next person with any sense, but forgive me for being sceptical about this thread.

Edited

This is very real, if that’s what you mean. I’m also surprised they took so long to produce the statement

OP posts:

Shmee1988 · 16/10/2025 14:43

Id send an anonymous copy of the email to the local paper.

smallglassbottle · 16/10/2025 14:28

I've voted yabu because this is what leftists want and you're a leftist. Unfortunately, the rest of us have to live with it as well.

HermioneWeasley · 16/10/2025 14:27

@whyyyyyisitmonddayy

trans women are just men. Men with a trans identity have a much higher rate if sex offending than men without so they’re not a safer demographic.

if the facilities are labelled for women then if they have a policy that people can use them based on their feelings, that is unlawful. If they claim to be sex segregated but do nothing to enforce it, it’s much harder.

as others have said, I would contact Sex Matters. You could also try writing to the university Chancellor explains they’re in breach of the Supreme Court judgment.

Talkinpeace · 16/10/2025 14:26

Join the Free Speech Union and talk to Connie.
Ignore left / right
Do the correct thing

The University are breaking the law (and they know it)

Agrumpyknitter · 16/10/2025 14:26

Ask them for their risk assessment on this new policy. They should be doing one at least.

spannasaurus · 16/10/2025 14:25

Onekidnoclue · 16/10/2025 13:48

I don’t believe that. Though I totally understand your reasoning. I do believe though that the criteria for entry for a women’s only space needs to be significantly higher than “feeling like it at the time”.
id love to say I had a solution. That there’s some criteria that trans women could meet that gives them entry to women only spaces but I don’t know what that would be. I did share your “XX” view of womanhood and in someways I agree but I feel incredibly uncomfortable with the idea of a trans woman who has been living that way for decades post surgery etc being forced into the “men’s” space where they would be extremely vulnerable and the stats should that being a trans woman is far riskier than being a cis woman.

Show quote history

Around 90% of transwomen retain their penis.

Prison statistics show that the percentage of transwomen in prison for sexual offences is higher than the percentage of non trans identifed men ( and of course significantly higher than women)

Obtaining a gender recognition certificate doesn't require that person to have had any surgery or take any hormones.

What criteria do suggest for allowing some men to use female single sex spaces?

LemonJellyLegs · 16/10/2025 14:23

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 13:31

uk, and I'm sorry but I really cannot name them as I risk unfair treatment. Some of my supervisors are LGBT themselves and would be very very upset if they got told of me reporting it

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So you are saying, your Lesbian, Bisexual women don't mind if men come in their changing room? I don't think you can see the wood for the trees.

If you don't like it, you must complain. How dare they send a note around the campus and expect all the women to bow down to it??

Morningsleepin · 16/10/2025 14:16

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 13:31

uk, and I'm sorry but I really cannot name them as I risk unfair treatment. Some of my supervisors are LGBT themselves and would be very very upset if they got told of me reporting it

Show quote history

Do your tutors know you as whyyyyisiþmonddayy?