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my university is allowing men to enter women's bathrooms changing rooms etc!

109 replies

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 13:26

I'm a student at this uni. I love it here, but it is a left leaning uni (as am I!)
I should add, I'm quite slight and petite and am generally very nervous of men.
Today, I got this email saying that they're letting people choose bathrooms or changing rooms based on "how they feel" and stated that whichever bathroom etc you want to use, you can enter in the name of inclusivity!
I'm very open to gender identity etc. I'm bi, and I have friends of all gender identities. I have trans friends, those who don't conform to binaries, etc, and I respect them greatly. and I am completely okay with sharing the majority of bathrooms at the uni, as that doesn't both me. I personally don't understand how you can feel like something you are scientifically not, but you only live once so you might as well be your true self.
but now I'm left wondering about gym changing rooms at the uni, as I'm not as okay with that. one does not have stalls and neither do the showers, so I'm expected to be be vulnerable in front of those who have genitalia which I don't want to see or be in bare in front of.
this also opens up the chances that a guy could walk into women's changing rooms, watch, and cannot be challenged
it also raises question of faith. it is not excluding women who cannot be naked in front of anyone but women (same goes for men). "just use the stalls, disabled loo etc" doesn't cut it as their isn't enough of those to go round and then those who actually need disabled toilets can't use them.
I also want there to be a couple of women only bathrooms too, because it doesn't seem fair I'm being told men will be entering women's bathrooms and the uni supports this, but religious / personal wishes to be in women only spaces is being walked over.
this is less about trans women entering these spaces, and more about harmful men entering them (although I don't want to see male gentalia in women's changing rooms full stop)
I can't speak out or ask as I will be ostracised and it's not worth my future.

OP posts:
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Inertia · 17/10/2025 13:42

Agix · 16/10/2025 13:31

If harmful men wanted to come and peep on you or attack you, they don't have to pretend to be a woman / trans woman and enter changing rooms or showers to do it.

And they won't start either, because that will make them way more visible and likely to get caught. They'll keep doing as they're doing now, lurking in the shadows to get you down a dark alley.

How does one objectively tell the difference between a man pretending to be a woman because he identifies as trans, and a man pretending to be a woman because he intends to harm women?

They are all male.

Women are constantly told to avoid placing themselves in risky situations, yet men merely need to pretend to feel like women to have access to women and girls at their most vulnerable.

Remembertheplan · 17/10/2025 13:24

Complain and or protest

Talkinpeace · 17/10/2025 13:03

The ruling and the law are absolutely clear.

It is scary how much deliberate law breaking is going on.

spannasaurus · 17/10/2025 12:59

How much effort do people think its takes for a man to pretend to be trans in order to enter female single sex spaces?

He just needs to say I'm a woman and that's it. He wouldn't even need to shave his beard because women have beards too

my university is allowing men to enter women's bathrooms changing rooms etc!
FlirtsWithRhinos · 17/10/2025 12:58

@Agix

Out of interest, how would a man "pretend" to be a trans woman? What would he be doing differently to show that he is a woman rather than a man?

FlirtsWithRhinos · 17/10/2025 12:49

Agix · 16/10/2025 13:31

If harmful men wanted to come and peep on you or attack you, they don't have to pretend to be a woman / trans woman and enter changing rooms or showers to do it.

And they won't start either, because that will make them way more visible and likely to get caught. They'll keep doing as they're doing now, lurking in the shadows to get you down a dark alley.

They don't have to, but they don't not have to either.

Do you really think the type of bloke (of any gender identity) who gets off on intimidating or assaulting women, maybe following her off the street hoping to get her somewhere secluded, is somehow going to stop at a door even know he knows no one will challenge him for entering? Do you think he respects trans women too much to pretend to be one?

Or the type of bloke (of any gender identity) who gets off on voyeurism? Is he going to say "No, this room with women changing or peeing is not for me no matter how much I want to be in thete because even though no one else will say anything to me, I know I'm not a trans woman so it's just not right". Really?

Balloonhearts · 17/10/2025 12:48

Agix · 16/10/2025 13:31

If harmful men wanted to come and peep on you or attack you, they don't have to pretend to be a woman / trans woman and enter changing rooms or showers to do it.

And they won't start either, because that will make them way more visible and likely to get caught. They'll keep doing as they're doing now, lurking in the shadows to get you down a dark alley.

Except they already are and already have. We've already seen several incidents of 'transwomen' assaulting girls and women in public toilets.

Michelle Martinez (previously Miguel) who raped a 10 year old girl in a bathroom? Or Lexi-Rose Crawford who has been jailed for the SECOND conviction of child sex abuse? Or Katie Dolakowki who sexually assaulted a 10 year old girl in a toilet at Morrisons? ‘She’ also previously tried to film a 12 year old girl in the toilet at Asda.

Brefugee · 17/10/2025 12:39

the "legal implication" is only unclear if you have a reading age of 7. And even then i expect a 7 year old to understand: if you have, or ever had, a penis you go in the men's. If you have, or ever had, a vulva/vagina, you go in the women's

ETA: that was a reply to @Yes54

Additionally: if they are introducing unisex, i expect them to comply with all laws, and not just relabel the current ones with "unisex with urinals" or "unisex without urinals"

OverTheWater28 · 17/10/2025 12:39

fireandlightening · 16/10/2025 21:30

I find it very hard to believe that this is real. I am an academic and University administration does not send out emails using language such as the one the OP quotes (eg: people can use bathrooms based on "how they feel"). Emails from Vice Chancellors are carefully worded and reviewed, likely by legal staff on contested issues such as this. I am not surprised the OP is refusing to screenshot the message.

Yeah, OP is being tellingly cagey about the finer points…

Yes54 · 17/10/2025 12:37

I received this yesterday, and I assume it's what the OP is referring to. The heading of the email was "Toilet Facilities on Campus". Here's the relevant text from the message:

WC Facilities Communication

Although the legal implications of the Supreme Court ruling remain unclear, we want to reinforce the message that we are an inclusive University where everyone is welcomed and supported. We are working hard in this space to try and find the best way through, and are mindful that for many, this is an uncertain time. It is important to share with all colleagues and students that we have a range of toilets, changing and washing facilities across our campuses to cater for all diverse gender identities. Fully enclosed, all-gender facilities can be used by anyone who may not feel comfortable in facilities otherwise provided. Please may we ask you members of our community to be mindful of dignity and respect for all when accessing these facilities. We will shortly be sharing a campus list of all WC facilities as a guide for colleagues and students.

Best wishes,

So make of that what you will. I gather that unisex bathrooms and changing facilities are being introduced across campus.

caringcarer · 17/10/2025 01:26

It's probably Oxford. They seem to adopt all left leaning women's there.

Abouttoblow · 17/10/2025 01:07

Onegingerhead · 16/10/2025 17:22

In my gym it totally doesn’t.
Missing on the entertainment, it seems.
I did see gender neutral cubicles in some unis, but, like, enclosed spaces. No snakes on show.

So for the last 10 or so years you've been in a bubble of your home and your gym? With no access to the news, newspapers or social media of any kind?
Sorry, no one is buying that BS

jezlifecoach · 17/10/2025 00:01

Agix · 16/10/2025 13:31

If harmful men wanted to come and peep on you or attack you, they don't have to pretend to be a woman / trans woman and enter changing rooms or showers to do it.

And they won't start either, because that will make them way more visible and likely to get caught. They'll keep doing as they're doing now, lurking in the shadows to get you down a dark alley.

So women only get attacked in dark alleyways?? 😂😂 okay.

some men don’t care and will commit their crimes in broad daylight in city centres if they want to. Allowing them into women’s bathrooms makes it much easier!

brownglass · 16/10/2025 21:32

They are breaking the law. Men aren't allowed to access women's single sex spaces regardless of how they identify.

fireandlightening · 16/10/2025 21:30

I find it very hard to believe that this is real. I am an academic and University administration does not send out emails using language such as the one the OP quotes (eg: people can use bathrooms based on "how they feel"). Emails from Vice Chancellors are carefully worded and reviewed, likely by legal staff on contested issues such as this. I am not surprised the OP is refusing to screenshot the message.

BallerinaRadio · 16/10/2025 20:09

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 18:07

I can vouch it is not. I obviously cannot prove it but I’m too busy to be bothered riling up people. More distressing things happen every day

Well you can prove it, you can take a shot of the letter without anything incriminating on it. It would take a few seconds and back up your inflammatory claims.

CautiousLurker01 · 16/10/2025 18:30

whyyyyyisitmonddayy
I can vouch it is not. I obviously cannot prove it but I’m too busy to be bothered riling up people. More distressing things happen every day

Hmmm… so this is just another one of those threads we’ve had lots of recently. All that effort to post OP and subsequent replies but now, all of a sudden, ‘can’t be bothered’…

Pilfer · 16/10/2025 18:21

Agix · 16/10/2025 13:31

If harmful men wanted to come and peep on you or attack you, they don't have to pretend to be a woman / trans woman and enter changing rooms or showers to do it.

And they won't start either, because that will make them way more visible and likely to get caught. They'll keep doing as they're doing now, lurking in the shadows to get you down a dark alley.

Huh… I’m not sure if giving you the benefit of the doubt means assuming you’re naïve or deliberately happy to waive women’s rights. Nope, neither looking good.

Still laughing about the idea that women will only ever be assaulted if they accidentally go into an alley, wait alleys are ok, just not a dark alley. Love it. Actually, I think you must be joking because it’s so funny.

wildflowersplease · 16/10/2025 18:17

RhymesWithOrange · 16/10/2025 18:13

What’s stopping you from naming the university and screenshotting the email?

Agree. Is it Edinburgh?

RhymesWithOrange · 16/10/2025 18:13

What’s stopping you from naming the university and screenshotting the email?

JurassicPark4Eva · 16/10/2025 18:09

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 14:52

i thought it was a wind up until I saw the ac.uk email and that it came from multiple heads of department via a forwarded forward from the VC.

Send that email to Sex Matters and a couple of newspapers.

whyyyyyisitmonddayy · 16/10/2025 18:07

BallerinaRadio · 16/10/2025 14:57

Me too.

This 100% feels like a post aimed just to blow up and rile people.

It's been a while since we've had a thread like this though maybe the OP thought we were due one.

Any chance of a look at the letter OP?

I can vouch it is not. I obviously cannot prove it but I’m too busy to be bothered riling up people. More distressing things happen every day

OP posts:
Nestnearlyempty · 16/10/2025 17:45

Can you speak to your SU welfare officer?

WilfredsPies · 16/10/2025 17:37

I feel utterly disgusted at the idea that a trans woman would be denied entry to a women’s space and forced to share space with men where she may not be comfortable or safe It’s not women’s jobs to ensure that men feel comfortable or safe. The answer is that they either do what women had to do and campaign for their own space, or they use the facilities corresponding with their sex and if anything awful happens to them, then they report it to the police, as women are expected to do now, when men like Ian Bullock, or Katie Dolatowski, harm us. That’s all there is to it.

ThatGlimmeringSea · 16/10/2025 17:31

Onekidnoclue · 16/10/2025 15:02

https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/press/ncvs-trans-press-release/

I guess there’s a debate about the language. Clearly trans women suffer violence and hate speech at a rate which is statistically significantly higher than cis women which is the point I was trying to make.
Im not debating that cis women are vulnerable and subject to physical violence and other assaults.
my concern is that transwomen are vulnerable and deserve protection and support. I’m not sure that allowing them into “women’s” spaces is the best way to afford them that protection but the alternative seems to me extremely cruel to a group which is demonstrably marginalised and vulnerable.

Why are transwomen and women vulnerable? Who are they at risk from?

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