DS hates my job

I think when you live a lifestyle that not many other parents lead, sometimes because they know it isn't compatible with parenthood in many cases, you might reconsider your choices sooner than someone in an office.

Most people don't live above their workplace. And even when they do, it isnt the type of place where people come until 11pm to entertain themselves.

Maybe not, but what im seeing from op is parents and the child getting the best of both worlds.
Parents are working but mum is able to dioschool run and events,No long commute for mum. Ive read so many posts about mums and dads doing an hour plus each way for their work.

The children I work with have parents who come from a couple of generations that have never worked, parents who are in the police and work irregular hours dealing with horrific things, dad in the army for months at a time, dad in jail, parents who are addicts, parents who live in a different country to the child and so on.
To be honest pub life doesn't seem so bad!

I dont need to because my kids have never complained that they hate my job and nor do we live above my workplace where my children are subjected to everyone I work with every night of their lives.

Well it’s not that it doesn’t matter but no, parents can’t be expected to change their entire lifestyle and job for a child that might love it next month
there is aspects of every parent or their job that a child will dislike, you can compromise on some things but to change everything is ridiculous

“sorry son, I know you hate me being a lawyer and coming home late, I’ll just retrain and find another job, but we will have to move as I’ll earn half the money and no more holidays”

if my mum hadn’t run pubs she would have stayed nursing - I would have disliked her being away more
if OP changes jobs the child might hate the house or having to go to childcare etc etc

Kids want to be with their parents all the time and mummy put them to bed - that's natural.
It's just not possible.

I'm a childminder specifically so I can be with my kids as much as possible but they still complain they don't want me to work 😂

How about you share your your lifestyle with the rest of us and we can all check if your child will not end up resenting you too? I’m sure we will be able to tell you where you are going wrong.

The OP has started a thread saying my son hates my job. Sounds like it isn't a normality he enjoys. But he's a child so it doesn't matter I suppose.

I am fairly sure, yes.

I know a lot of people who felt pressured into adopting their parents lifestyle and they didn't like it and feel it has impacted on their life as adults.

It is fairly normal though if you grow up like that
effectively you’re in a “apartment” above so your home is separate and often a different entrance. it’s less intrusive than WFH

it’s not like you’re living actually in the pub as such
the last pub I was in had a beautiful 3 bed apartment above, living room, dining room, kitchen and 2 bathrooms plus an office. separate door from the outside so you didn’t have to go in the pub

Ah, I did live in my workplace and work involved overnights with people around till 11pm so pub life sounds fairly normal to me. ExDP's family lived over their shop, open 7 days a week. Admittedly not in the late evenings.

No they don't have a choice and that's why as loving parents, we should bear in mind that our choices may not be the best for them. Or you know we can just think "fuck them, they get tea every night, their feelings are irrelevant to me".

Most people don't live above their workplace. And even when they do, it isnt the type of place where people come until 11pm to entertain themselves.

A different slant on this, I was a SAHM when my children were 7. They were regularly annoyed that I always picked them up from school and they didn’t go to after school club, or the seemingly much loved childminder who picked up a gaggle of children at the end of the school day.
They complained bitterly why did I always pick them up from school at the end of the standard school day as they thought they missed out on extra fun.

So, basically when they are 7 you can’t win. Being a sahm, working outside the home, someone who works away regularly , working and living as you do at the pub, and every other variation we all do to make it work - kids will have their complaints at us parents whatever we do.

Yeah living above a beautiful old pub in Oxford in an area of houses we could never afford was grim

plus the huge play area, garden leading to woods, being able to bring all my school class to play, choosing whatever food I wanted off the menu, constant new people to meet, parents home 24/7… awful

He's 7, he's seven weeks into term, and he's probably tired.

Half term is next week. Set some time aside to do lovely things together and he'll have forgotten all about it in a week.

You can only do your best.

Have you ever lived above a pub? What are you basing your "grim" opinion on here?

Loads of people live above shops, barbers etc. would you have an issue with those people having children or is it just the ones who live above pubs that are grim?

Country pubs are community hubs, very different to an inner city boozer. it's a way of life, for sure but OP seems to have lots of time with her DC. It's not a life for everyone I would think but families have done so since the dawn of time.

No child has a choice in their parents’ career or lifestyle though, so that’s just a ridiculous argument to try and make.

You're banging on as though OP is forcing her child up chimneys or being chained to the oven - when in fact he’s just living above the pub his mum owns.

The horror 🙄

I think you may have misread my post? I said that I hadn't enjoyed pub life and could see why others might find it difficult, but I am not sure what the OP can immediately do about it.

I’d hate to live above a pub. Sounds grim.

And I have zero idea what Bluey is

Good grief. Exactly how is this life 'shit'? Or are you Bluey (never seen it, wouldn't know).

Stop doing everything you have a partner so share the load
If kids moan that dad is putting them to bed let them moan but carry on with Dad doing his nights
You work additional day and the kids moan let them but carry on

Ridiculous comment. What 7 year old has an actual choice in the parents' lifestyle? Are you certain your lifestyle is the right one for your children? You seem to know a lot about OP's son and are very sure he will resent her. Are you projecting?

What on earth might a normal life be? There are parents on here who work shifts, families where GP do childcare, people scrabbling through the days to do the best they possibly can. Parents in the middle of ghastly divorces.
DD had a friend with a perfect mother, wonderful after school treats and always there at drop off and pick up.
Her friend's family imploded in a very serious way involving prison. Another of her friend's mother died when friend and DD were 9. We all want the best we can for for our children but they have to grow up in the world as it is and know that we love them.

I never made a point of telling ds's who would be putting them to bed and for how many nights each week. Perhaps this approach is making it a 'thing'.
Your dc seems to have in his head that dad is the 'booby' prize. That's where I think changes should be made.