Controversial approach to Santa

I fucking hate Xmas and would quote happily ignore it completely. (Indeed, for many years, I worked throughout.)

I always see people like you in mumsnet and it bewildered me. They are only little once and I personally want my kids to have all the magic in the world.

These types of posts or so sad.

Honestly I can’t see what the problem is - they are so small they aren’t going to be ‘ruining Christmas’ for 8 and 9 year old cousins as I doubt they would even mention it!

However, as someone who was brought up without ever being allowed to believe in Father Christmas, I will tell you that I am jealous of my husband who grew up with the magic of Father Christmas until he stopped believing aged about 10ish. We did stockings from Father Christmas for our children and all other gifts are from who they are actually from - I think they stopped believing aged about 9 or 10 but I’m not 100% sure as they are 12 & 14 now and haven’t officially told me as they still want to get a stocking 😂

It is an unusual approach and it seems one that will actually be more hard work than just going along with tradition. Of course it won’t damage your kids but it will create problems in the future like the one you’ve come up against.

We did the same. No problems trying to explain why we lied to them for years and they realised we were the ones giving the presents. No drama, no issues!

My husband grew up with Santa. Lots of Santa. Our children and I are Jewish - we celebrate Christmas and Easter with him but we don’t do Santa or church. We love the food and we have stockings (now the kids are a bit older we all put little bits in each other’s stockings which is lovely) and we have presents on Christmas Day. And a chocolate advent calendar and all that. But no Santa. His parents were the only ones to find this problematic and I am sure it’s just because they have lovely memories of the story from his childhood. My kids have many happy memories of Christmas (and Chanukah) and it’s never been an issue at all.

we live in a super mixed catchment and there was a situation with a child getting nothing and wondering if they’d done something wrong when he went to a playdate at a friends. And that made me think about it from that angle as well. Children absolutely compare notes on gifts and it’s sad to think that children who are from challenging situations also think a magical man doesn’t take care of them.

How lack of sense of humour-y of you.

wow @girlfriend44 at the very least it’s a day surrounded by great food and drink and family. What’s not to like! I love Christmas so I’m your polar opposite. I love giving and receiving gifts. I loved the magic of Santa when kids were young. I get that some people do it differently but surely a day of happiness can’t be hated. Even if I was alone I’d love it and have a great time to myself, indulging in whatever I wanted and watching whatever crap I want. Do you dislike other days and occasions?

Ban xmas altogether.its brainwashing.
Who needs presents just because someone said a baby was born sometime in December. A virgin birth.
Because this fairytale was banded around and people got brainwashed we still have this horrible thing called Christmas every 12 months.

@ImissgoldengrahamsPlease tell your DS before he goes to secondary school. His life will be a misery if any of the other kids find out he still believes in Santa. I taught year 6 for many years and I can’t remember any kids who still believed.

Also I was 13 😂

Indeed. Peace and goodwill to all. Unless you don't celebrate in exactly the way I do and if your child dares to innocently say anything that RUINS THE MAGIC (tm) for my child I will destroy you.

Lovely attitude.

My son is 11 and genuinely believes.
I've heard him talk to his friends and they've all said he is real.
My son cried yesterday because the tooth fairy didn't visit him and take away his tooth

I’m sorry this thread has turned nasty about your DH.

We should be grateful that people do volunteer to keep working on public holidays, Christmas being the biggest one in the UK.

So long as he is present and engaged when he is with them and gives them attention all year around there is nothing wrong with children seeing the dad go to hospital to help sick or injured children on Christmas Day.

How Christmassy of you.

Nothing wrong with your approach but I would want to shit on your tree if your children ruined it for mine! 🤣

Honestly the vibe I am getting is that the reason he is happy to follow your family's approach rather than his sister's "Santa is an essential part of the magic of Christmas" approach is because he can't be arsed with Christmas in general.

Which just shows how stupid it all is. Elf on the Shelf wasn't a thing when most (any?) of us on the thread were young, but now some parents have decided it's tradition and it's a crime against humanity if you don't carefully coach your children to lie and say the elf is real.

You'll never have to deal with the disappointment of finding out Santa isn't real. Which is great for you. I wish I'd done it your way, to be honest.

I remember taking DD to Disneyland Paris when she was 3.5.

It was about 3 minutes after walking into the main park when a little (but loud) voice said “don’t worry mummy, those characters are just people dressed up”. 😂

Well, technically it’s a festival celebrating the solstice that got violently stolen from the pagans……..

I have fairy lights up all year. Presumably that means I’m more joyful on around 350 days more per year than everyone else!

Or maybe you could teach your kids that lots of people believe different things about Christmas.

I'm not getting my kids to be complicit in something that we don't believe in for the sake of other children - if they talk about santa with their friends then it's a big thing to put on small children to expect them to lie and pretend and not be able to talk about their own Christmas properly in order to "protect the magic".

We don't do it for anything else. Kids aren't required to pretend that Elsa or Spiderman are really real to all other kids just in case they happen to believe in them.

Im with you @Lynsey953
In our house Father Christmas isnt made a big deal of. Hes basically a glorified delivery man. The children know that the gifts are from me. (How else do you explain to a child that Father Christmas bought one kid a playstation and you got some chocolate in a stocking) They are aware that they may not get everything they ask for.
So all gifts are from who bought them. I think the eldest any of mine have got to, believing in FC is probably 8?
My son actually at 3 just point blank refused to believe, I didnt discourage him, just told him, if thats what you think then thats fine but you dont upset others by telling them. He kept quiet. He loves Christmas.

Saying that we are Catholics and they learn that it is Jesus' birthday and that is why we exchange gifts, to celebrate with him.

Do Christmas however you feel is best for you as a family. The pressure on some parents at this time of year is immense and it would be nice if it was scaled back and the focus be on spending time together, then how big the pile of presents is.