Page 4 | The most important decision a woman will ever make is

Upstartled · 14/10/2025 15:52

Yes, of course. Having a child to a complete arsehole and being tethered to them in the joint venture of raising a child and subjecting your child to that father forever, has the legs to decimate your life and your child's life in a way that many other bad decisions cannot hold a candle to.

spoonbillstretford · 14/10/2025 15:51

I think choices made before can be more important such as whether you are financial independent and capable of supporting yourself, and indeed choosing whether to have a serious relationship. None of those may actually involve a man at all at this point.

Didimum · 14/10/2025 15:51

hyggetyggedotorg · 14/10/2025 15:08

I think it’s whether to have children at all.

Hard agree.

MrsNadjaCravensworth · 14/10/2025 15:51

Isn't it whether or not to have children at all?

Pickledpoppetpickle · 14/10/2025 15:44

youalright · 14/10/2025 15:08

To get out of bed to pee at 4am in the middle of winter or hold it and not be able to sleep.

been there sooooo many times.

YourPeppyAmberTraybake · 14/10/2025 15:40

Whether to have a fringe or not.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 14/10/2025 15:35

It’s definitely AN important decision - but it’s also a false one because you never make it with all the information available. It’s only really smug people who truthfully lucked up with their partners who think you can predict what their partner will be like as a father. You can’t.

A woman’s choice of career can also be vitally important, and whether to continue with it post children, as it affects your ability to leave said man if he’s not suitable. And if you don’t have children, or if you do and your happy with your partner, it massively affects your quality of life.

Redpeach · 14/10/2025 15:34

AmpleSwan · 14/10/2025 15:31

I think about this a lot. I don't know if I would say it's the most important because women can live important and fufilling lives without making the decision to have children at all. HOWEVER, choosing to have kids with a shithead (even if he doesn't seem like a shithead when you make the choice) is the thing which has fucked life up for the most women I know. In my experience more women get fucked up by that than by drugs or drink. Of the women I know who are living in poverty, not fufilling their potential, stalled in their careers, knackered, mentally ill or deeply unhappy to the point it's affecting their physical health there is so often a shit dad to their kids somewhere in there that mangled their finances, their ability to work, their childrens wellbeing or even if he's still in the household just isn't doing his share so the woman is knackered and losing herself.

Theres a big difference between choosing to have sex with a shit head and choosing to have kids with a shit head

indoorplantqueen · 14/10/2025 15:33

I think it’s who you chose to be your life partner (if you do chose one).

manchestermaggie · 14/10/2025 15:33

Doseofreality · 14/10/2025 15:32

And there’s me thinking it was to spit or swallow on a first date.

😆

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 14/10/2025 15:33

Doseofreality · 14/10/2025 15:32

And there’s me thinking it was to spit or swallow on a first date.

Wine tasting sounds like a lovely first date

Doseofreality · 14/10/2025 15:32

And there’s me thinking it was to spit or swallow on a first date.

CrostaDiPizza · 14/10/2025 15:32

@Bottlefall , I'd love to think it isn't true, but it is. Who the mother of a man's children is important, but it doesn't impact every aspect of their life, career, health, financial situation in the same way.
Because a mother has no influence at all on a child, does she?

MsTamborineMan · 14/10/2025 15:31

Arlanymor · 14/10/2025 15:08

I can't have kids. So I guess none of my decisions are important. Good to know.

I don't remember the OP saying the only important decision a woman can make is who to have children with...

AmpleSwan · 14/10/2025 15:31

I think about this a lot. I don't know if I would say it's the most important because women can live important and fufilling lives without making the decision to have children at all. HOWEVER, choosing to have kids with a shithead (even if he doesn't seem like a shithead when you make the choice) is the thing which has fucked life up for the most women I know. In my experience more women get fucked up by that than by drugs or drink. Of the women I know who are living in poverty, not fufilling their potential, stalled in their careers, knackered, mentally ill or deeply unhappy to the point it's affecting their physical health there is so often a shit dad to their kids somewhere in there that mangled their finances, their ability to work, their childrens wellbeing or even if he's still in the household just isn't doing his share so the woman is knackered and losing herself.

YorkshirePuddingsGreatestFan · 14/10/2025 15:30

The moment you reach the "fuck it" age and decide to tell everyone what you really think of them, stop being walked all over and don't care about doing your hair and putting your make up on to go to the shop.

MsTamborineMan · 14/10/2025 15:30

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 14/10/2025 15:06

Poppadoms or bread?

Not a decision ove ever had to make. Obviously the answer is both

inamo · 14/10/2025 15:28

To be able at all times to paddle her own canoe.

Friendlygingercat · 14/10/2025 15:27

Whether to have children or not.

JHound · 14/10/2025 15:24

Arlanymor · 14/10/2025 15:08

I can't have kids. So I guess none of my decisions are important. Good to know.

I don't have children so I guess none of my decisions are important either!

Mizztikle · 14/10/2025 15:24

Yes it is important to chose the right man however, Its more important to be sure of yourself. Men can and do change, the man you got pregnant with is not always the same man you get as a father trust me.

frozendaisy · 14/10/2025 15:19

It's a very important decision. Yes. And one I took very seriously and don't regret a moment, still together, still parenting the only two teens either of us have. It's just not complicated. Difficult at times but not complicated.

squashyhat · 14/10/2025 15:16

hyggetyggedotorg · 14/10/2025 15:08

I think it’s whether to have children at all.

Yup

Lavenderandbrown · 14/10/2025 15:16

What type of education they pursue….leading to all their future job opportunities. I really don’t agree with the man who fathers part. I wish I had chosen a different father (but of course had the same exact dc😉) but having my solid education and career made divorcing him a difficult time for me and my dc but not in it a trajectory changing kind of way.

mamagogo1 · 14/10/2025 15:14

@youalright

so true!

I think knowing when to call it a day on marriage is a huge question