To be fed up of the "home birth is risky" misinformation?

Exactly.

It’s like a lot of us don’t even realise we have a choice.

Sorry I should have put a caveat; unless you choose to free birth*

Many home births are completely safe but you cannot predict when problems will occur, and with births it can escalate very quickly. I personally chose non intervention hospital births for mine, no drugs etc but knowing there was a red button in emergency is reassuring

Well that’s a funny observation because women don’t always stay in hospital overnight after having a baby?

My midwife was there the next morning and every few days for 2 weeks after the birth

My friend didn't. Did it by herself. Didn't turn up until baby was born and was one of them

But they’re not there with you over night after baby is born or the next morning for example, the first 12 hours were a blur to me, I felt completely out of my depths, I didn’t have family apart from dh though so may be different for me.

I’m sorry but your circumstances for home birth were quite specific and in Covid times and that isn’t the situation now. Also you are referring to issues with vaginal examination for example which are obviously specific to you (most women I imagine find this an uncomfortable but necessary part of women’s healthcare throughout their life).

What other people are saying is that there are very few reasons that they would opt for a home birth that would be worth the risk of something going wrong.

Your reasons are very specific and personal so I can see why this isn’t going to be a balanced argument as these aren’t issues for the majority of people now.

I’m not sure if this has already been said, but in most cases something goes wrong because of being in hospital and the natural interventions that brings.

When you birth at home, you have two midwives with you the entire time. In a hospital they are having to manage more women and will pop in and out.

And if something terrible goes wrong with baby, are you safer in hospital, or at home?

This. I actually did want a homebirth but decided against it in the end. Thinking of it now, I liked having the midwives near me to assist me/ clean up the bed etc. I also liked having them there assisting me with breastfeeding/ showing my husband how to change a nappy etc. I felt completely overwhelmed and even missed my baby’s feeding ques which the midwife pointed out to me.

Yes, we are agreeing sorry! 🤩 but also I don’t really get why ‘on balance’ even if safe home births would be considered better anyway. Maybe infection risk I suppose?

Yep! Or on your sofa! 🤣

Yes! It was the same here, I desperately wanted my partner there and was terrified of having to go to do it alone in hospital. I absolutely couldn’t tolerate the idea of a sweep or VE, so I felt the same. At the time, I felt frightened and like if I went to hospital I’d be forced to do things I didn’t want to do.

I think the women who birthed in hospital during Covid are so brave, I feel so sad for everything they went through. It wasn’t right the way they preventing women having a birthing partner there.

So if you have a tear, does the midwife stitch you up there and then in your bed?

Exactly, that's what I said at the end of my post - you can never know how it's going to go!

I’m not being harsh but you can’t guess or often judge ‘if it’s going to go well’. But also why is it better at home? I’m being genuine, is it infection risk this is based on?

I couldn’t see any benefit at all just loads of potential risks.

Also I got great advice with breast feeding, quick checks for tongue ties etc and my midwives if anything wanted a less medicated birth than I wanted at some stages (encouraging me along with my birth plan)

The best bit for me about homebirth was that my toddler came home an hour later and the three of us (DDs and me) snuggled up on my bed for a bit before DD1 went to bed. We have photos of both girls together from that night. It was a lovely time.

After waiting so long, going through so many cycles of IVF, losing so many babies there was no way on earth I would have considered an home birth. My comfort regarding labour and delivery came a very distant second to the safe arrival of my baby and his post delivery care. As I personally believe it should for every women.

@everychildmatters You seem determined to deny the literal lived experiences of women in cases where the facts don’t conform to your belief. I am sure you are sincere and mean well but it is actually a bit offensive. I’m willing to believe that home birth is a great experience for lots of women, so why is it so hard for you to believe the women on here sharing their alternative experience? Do you really think a highly trained doctor made the decision to cut me open (at a cost of thousands to the NHS) for no good reason? It was to save the life of my baby, who was in serious distress. She absolutely would not have survived a home birth. I don’t get the argument of some posters that ‘oh well you’d have been transferred to hospital anyway if it was a home birth that went that wrong’. As if just being transferrred to hospital during labour is some easy, stress free, no big deal process - as if we live in a world full of ambulances circulating at all times, freely available at the point of need - not to mention traffic-free roads and copious empty well-staffed hospital beds ready and waiting for home-birth-gone-wrong transfers. The fact is that while home birth might be a great experience in some cases, it’s extremely risky in others, and crucially, it’s not always easy to tell which birth will be which. Its also not scaremongering to state that many women and babies would die without medical intervention - this is just a fact, evidenced by the maternal mortality rates a century ago and indeed around the world to this day where medical care is not freely available. It’s well documented that we as a species are poorly designed to give birth due to the obstetrical dilemma caused by our bipedalism… Midwives are great, of course, and I have nothing but love and respect for them, but they can’t perform miracles, and they can’t perform C sections.

Who said worried? Just a preference. I have no desire to be in my own space when a big wet room with someone else responsible for cleaning it was at my disposal.

As I say I'm lucky that my preference based on comfort was the same as my preference based on risk assessment.