Inheritance

Of course not everyone inherits, not even everyone on Mumsnet. Thinking that you 'should' or 'will' inherit is a recipe for misery and resentment.
My mum died young and left me some of her savings and some to my dad. Dad very quickly started another relationship (which was why Mum directly left some money to me; she suspected he would), and at one point he changed his will in favour of his partner. Then they fell out and he changed it back shortly before he died, so I inherited for a second time. But I might easily not have, if he and his partner had made it up, or he'd met someone else, or if he'd needed long term care. People's circumstances and finances can change very quickly, so don't rely on anything.

Some may mean it, but I bet a lot don’t, especially if they’ve had a terrible life due to them!

I got 10k from a great aunt about twenty years ago. God bless her as it paid for a new bathroom when ours was awful.

My inheritance status is zero now.

My parents: loaded (grandparents were very wealthy) but I have been cut out of the will due to calling out my parents’ abuse of me and my now deceased sister. Golden child (who knows the truth) going along with parents’ version as he will inherit everything.

DH’s parents: divorced. Father remarried and left everything to his wife and new family. Husband and his sister got nothing. MIL remarried to a man only ten years older than DH and I. I expect both of them to go on for at least another 2-3 decades by which point (if there is anything left) DH and I would be in our 70s/80s - if we are actually even alive! I guess there might be something left to benefit the grandchildren.

Everyone else I know is looking at 200k plus but it is what it is. I already had bad luck in being born to my parents and that bad luck has followed me in all sorts of ways since my birth. I am not the only one in that position, I’m sure. I’ve tried my best to earn my own money and so far I’m ok.

Good luck to everyone on this thread xxx

It makes me roll my eyes when people inherit but then say “but I’d rather have my parents back”. We all rather would, but dead parents and basically a lottery win of £300k is mint compared to dead parents and lumped with a funeral bill 🤣

Never had anything from anyone. MIL's assets depleting net of £1K a week for care home fees so doubt anything coming our way from DH's parents.

I think a lot of people would take out this type of insurance, plus a cap on care fees would be a fair solution too.

Both my parents have died and didn't have any assets so received no inheritance.

Unless insurance is compulsory ( I don’t know - like national insurance for example) there will be plenty who want to not spend their own money looking after themselves but still expect someone too

When my grandad died, everything went to my grandma (my other grandad died when I was in primary school and his wife was in her early 50’s so I presume she had everything but he died without a will). She ended up in a care home as extremely depressed without him and didn’t want to be at home alone anymore, and didn’t want to live with any of her children. The care home used up all of their lifesavings and proceeds from the sale of their home. She died about a week after dropping below the savings threshold for the local council to cover her fees. All of the grandchildren got around £2k each in inheritance. Great grandchildren £500 each. I’m not sure if her 2 remaining children (1 of her sons died the year before she did) got anything or if it all went to the grandchildren.

When my last remaining grandparent died, everything was split between her three children. My parents chose to give my sister and I £5k each specifically to use on a family holiday, which we were incredibly grateful for.

But no - no massive inheritances here like you read of so often. No bank of mum and dad helping with house deposit etc either (although they’ve just done that for my sister and they’ll be amending the will to reflect what she’s had as they owned the house she lived in). My millionaire patents didn’t even help me out with tuition fees or textbooks at uni. I’ve just this year (at nearly 46) finished paying off my student loan though so that’s been nice finally.

Im not bitter, just stating the facts so you can see some people don’t have that leg up you see so often happening…. And that just because someone’s parents have money it doesn’t mean they are helping the kids financially.

I think there should be something like insurance packages available for care home fees, plus the fees capped, so that children don’t have their inheritance wiped out. The Tories were going to do this and it got kicked into the long grass.

How can it just be a Mumsnet thing? Mumsnet posters exist in the real world too.

What do YOU think should have happened? Who should have paid for the care home? You and me the taxpayers?

I haven’t either!
When dads parents died, they left everything to him and his sister.
My mums mum is still alive but has already said her house is to be split between her 5 children (one of them being my mum, obviously). Neither grandparent left anything in their will for my brother and I.
My parents will leave everything to us, but hopefully that’s a long time off yet!

This is awful, I'm so so sorry.

The judge would take that into account when determining entitlement, surely?
Why don’t parents just divide it equally between their children /relatives, unless there is some terrible reason why they wouldn’t ? It would save a lot of heartache and resentment!

Yes, I wonder if the funds could be withdrawn for her by the executor, or op could get an id.

I don’t understand why dgc should inherit.
Any money I leave will go to my dc.
I love my dgc very much and I feel confident that their parents will help them if and when necessary.
My responsibility is to leave money to my dc to make up for any part of their childhood when we had to scrimp and they didn’t get my time as I was busy working.
My dc will, imo, have a similar responsibility to their own dc.

I’m surrounded by people who will very likely get varying sums of money. I will inherit nothing. It does make me a little envious when the same people haven’t had to pay their own university fees etc. Money helps with many many situations. Never mind… on we struggle!

Well that doesn't entitled you to an inheritance. It's not pay per care

I’m approaching 40, I’ve never received an inheritance. I never knew my paternal grandparents or my maternal grandmother. My maternal grandfather remarried in later life to a bit of a horrorbag woman with a scumbag son who basically manipulated wills and trusts to ensure he completely ripped off my family so my mother and her siblings received nothing from their father.

I may well inherit from my parents one day but who knows.

Then I see people around me inheriting large amounts from grandparents, even family friends! It’s an odd one really and it can leave you feeling a little bitter, how that sum of money could really help.

I’m from a poor background and was orphaned at 18-I left my council house with a suitcase of clothes and that was it. I’ve never had any inheritance-but am glad I can leave my kids something when I die. I have no intention of going into a care home. My dh is from a large family and his parents have a modest house so his inheritance won’t be big. I do get pangs of jealousy sometimes when I see friends and their second homes and cruises-and their kids who don’t really have to work very hard but who will be far richer than mine will ever be. But then I give my head a wobble and thank the Lord we’re healthy, we can afford nice food and that my kids have grown up to be good people who seem to be dealing well with life.

Because she had cared for her father?

Theoretically I will inherit a lot from my parents when they die but if they need care I will inherit nothing. My children however will inherit a considerable amount from other family which is lovely but no one seems to be taking anything for granted there either. So lovely if it happens but just get on with moving on in careers is our attitude, don't rely on something nebulous.

Why would she have any reason to contest the will?

The prospect of inheriting does strange things to some people.

I had a distant relative who I have ended up looking after for the last few years of her life. Fortunately she had a decent pension and until the last few months was able to pay for much of her care out of income, while I did a lot unpaid too in the years leading up to that. She lived very frugally in a small rented bed-sit, and gave the distinct impression she wasn't particularly well off.

This relative also had a niece (much closer in terms of blood line and intestacy rules) who had initially been quite involved. But one day, the niece found a bank statement showing that I was a joint signatory on the account. It didn't have much in - couple of thousand quid at most - but the niece went berserk, pointing out it would automatically become mine on death. We had done it simply because I was doing a lot of the shopping etc and it was a quick and dirty workaround until we got all the POA stuff sorted.

The niece went NC. What she didn't know was that I was also managing the elderly relative's investment portfolio, and there were several other savings accounts too. The relative was worth just over £0.5m when she died in the summer. The niece is named in the will, but was so effective at cutting off ties that I can't actually find her to distribute what will be a decent six figure sum once I get probate!