Inheritance

My PIL have 2 sons - DH and his brother. DH and I have 3 kids, DBIL has 2 kids. I understand but have not discussed directly with PILs (as it is none of my business) the fact that they have put all their assets in trust to be inherited by the 5 DGC. They will leave a reasonable size inheritance although not enough to trigger IHT.

It bothers me only in the sense that one of my DC has mental health issues and I would worry about her having direct access to a significant sum at this stage (there may be an age restriction on accessing it but who knows).
It bothers DH in that DBIL's family get less than we do and they are anyway not as well off as we are (they are doing fine but we are considerably wealthier). The thing is we cannot ourselves do anything to change the split as the money is going to our kids and not us. I do also think that it would have been nice for DBIL and his lovely wife to have the money themselves if it was available as I suspect otherwise they will be working until 67.

This is why increasing inheritance tax is so fair.

Basically taxing against the population that borrowed the money, a lot of whom have unproductive wealth and are obsessed with trying to accumulate more.

Instead the government will probably up the taxes on the working young and destroy the economy in the process.

The Daily Rage though would scream death tax. In the same way it screams dementia tax. And in the end the whole country in about 10-20 years time will slide into the abyss with crap services and a massive sense of self entitlement.

Yes, but only so long as it's a lifestyle that you approve of? What if they wanted to go to Vegas and it all got spent? If that's what they wanted to do whilst they are alive why shouldn't they?

My grandmother often used to try to threaten her children with, "I'm going to spend my money and there won't be anything left for you", to which they responded, "Good. You've worked hard for it. Enjoy it as you want whilst you still can. We're not in need of your money".

Household wealth in the uk has more than doubled from 3x national income in the 80s to 7 times currently. Over the same period the national debt has gone from 45% of GDP to around 100% now.
So households have got richer and government has borrowed to fund that lifestyle (and win votes).
This is why the country is in a financial mess and all the discussion is about wealth tax. It just isn’t fair on younger generations. For full disclosure I am early Gen X and bought my first property in 1995 so have fully gorged at this trough but I do intend to fully help my children.

Clearly that’s not what I wrote, but why let the truth get in the way of a good story. My point was about leaving it to a cats home or blowing it in Vegas. It shouldn’t be wasted, it belongs to all generations. Absolutely pay for your care and if goes, it goes, c’est La vie

I think I'd like to hear less of 'how hard they worked' and the 'hilarious' sking - spending the kids inheritance joke.
The in -laws I'm thinking of, got free open uni courses, grants for professional development, etc and yet the bitching about my kids going to uni, taking on phenomenal amounts of debt. Paying some other boomer eye watering sums for a student HMO. They truely have had the best of times but without seemingly any awareness or gratitude.

Sorry to hear you feel this way. Have you got any friends who have lost a parent or someone you can talk to?
We lost Dad 6 months ago he was only 67. We've had a 100k inheritance this week which we plan to pay off the mortgage. Whilst I'm grateful for it, it wasn't a nice feeling getting the money. I just wish I could spend another day with him.
Take care x

So you'd begrudge your parents living the life they wanted to live whilst they still could in order to fund a lifestyle you'd like to have?

Would you (as I've seen others doing) deny your parents the help that they might need in their later years in order to keep "your" inheritance in tact too?

Wow.

I thought so, until he got 250 k and I didn't.

Fair enough, but most parents (presumably) love their children equally.

Honestly, reading about the wills issues who gets what makes me quite happy all my family is in country with set rules about this and you can't just leave a child out.

Oh i understand then.

My stepmum has arranged in her will to do this quite deliberately. Rather than leave to the stepchildren it's going straight to the step-grandchildren because I've had more kids than my sister and my sister has been an utter bitch to our stepmum...

My grandparents left their money to their children, not their grandchildren. To me this seems a lot fairer, as one child could have 1 (or even zero) offspring, while another could have 4 or 5.
It seems unfair that the person who has decided to have multiple children should receive the lions share of the parents inheritance for their own family.

Both myself and dp grew up in council houses and there is no inheritance. We are however actively planning towards being in a position to help our children.

I mean if you assume iht @40% that is still £3m divided between them. If there are 4 kids then that's £750k each.

And that pretty much ignores the fact that the actual iht bill won't be 40% but something less than that depending on how much of that £5m is their home plus the tax free allowance.

I think that you'll find that older generations have effectively stolen from younger generations. Gold plated final salary pensions, public sector pensions, triple lock, house prices going from 3x to 7/8x earnings, all whilst increasing the national debt, ie. not paying enough in the system themselves compared to what they are taking out.
So I'd be a bit pissed off if they decided to take that money to Vegas and blow it, or gave it to the cats home. At least with inheritance some of it goes back into the system via IHT and the rest gets passed to the generation that are paying for their pensions, etc.

I do feel for the people who see their parents' wealth go to step-siblings. That must be a bitter pill to swallow.

I have used my first support emoji!

Hear !hear!

I feel entitled to my possible future inheritance as payback for my crappy childhood and having a useless mother who has inadvertently caused a lot of damage. Sure she can do what the hell she wants with her money but I can and will feel what I feel. If it doesn’t happen then I’ll get over it.

I too will inherit nothing and I am bitter. DH and I both have fairly feckless parents who have squandered houses and also remarried so their wealth has passed to step-families.

Well, them's the breaks but I think it would take a SAINT not to be bitter. It means we both have to work until retirement age and beyond, which is a shit quality of life in comparison to retiring early and having financial security.

Yes I get these posts that say "I'd rather have my parents alive" but that's not the deal. Our parents still die! We just get months of admin instead.

I find the sense of entitlement in some of these posts quite astonishing.

It's not your inheritance until they are gone. Until then it's their savings and assets to do with as they please and there's no need for anyone else to know your financial details. Further, if they want to give it all to the local cats home on their death, that's their right.

My adult and older teen DC have no idea what i have in the bank or not because it's frankly none of their business, just as I don't know what my adult DC has in their account.

Some people are talking on here as though others have had a lottery win FFS. Have some sensitivity!

H got about £20 from his parents - now both dead). I have had nothing so far - elderly parent who may have to go into a care home, so probably sweet FA for me too!

Every one of my friends have inherited substantial amounts though. One got £150K from an aunt she had never heard of!

A doctor can sign it for you.

Nothing. And not expecting anything. My DF doesn't even own his home, renting. No others alive.