Inheritance

Nope - I'm comfortable and it's his money, he can do whatever he wants with it

then they need to save a lot more money when they are younger then

you can’t always get what you want

No, none of us inherited anything. My sister got half of the house after our grandma died. I'm not likely to inherit anything for a long, long time, if at all. If it happens, I'll probably be too old to enjoy it really.

Most parents would want their children to receive an inheritance imo

I didn't inherit anything from my grandparents. One set didn't have anything to leave to us. The others left it, quite rightly in my book, to one of my aunties who had given up her job to look after both her parents as they gradually became more in need of care.
I don't expect to inherit anything from my own parents as I disagreed with them about granny's will!

How mean of him. If he does leave everything to your brother, would you contest the will?

Absolutely! See Middlemarch et al too.

People used to spend years toadying to aged aunts or drifting around not knuckling down to a job because they had great expectations .

Frankly we had reasonable expectations of the pil, especially as they were very very stingy. However, dementia intervened. I always snort at the posters who trumpet “I would never put my parents in a home.” Dementia is not being a big dotty. It can mean double incontinence, anger, violence, not following 24-hour-clock and is not necessarily life limiting. A friend’s df lived for 17 years in a care home.

Nice? I suspect they don't have a choice

My parents have some savings from downsizing last year, but I am encouraging them to spend that while they are still here. If they don't then it will go on care home fees, I can't imagine me or DB will see any of it- nor are we expecting to.

I think people used to receive inheritance more often, partly as people had more money to leave and party because we didn't have the medical inteferences we do now that keep people alive for much longer but needing care. That unfortunately costs money.

People talk a lot about care home fees. In practice quite a low proportion of people end up paying them. Most people will receive some inheritance. Both my parents dropped dead while relatively young and never needed care. I did receive an inheritance.

I don't know anyone who hasn't inherited something, no.

Exactly what happened to me.

Exdh really believed he would inherit from his parents.
I tried to warn him that he wouldn’t because in his family the tradition was that only the eldest son inherited.

Both his mother and father assured him that what I was saying was simply not true and fil stated that both mil and him had not left him out of any wills. Apparently I was talking nonsense

Apparently I was not talking nonsense and me being right all along and him realising that both his parents and brother had lied to him. And other things I had pointed out over the time we were together that didn’t add up or were put right lies. It might have not been the only thing to tip him over the edge but it certainly didn’t help. I would go as far as to say it ended our marriage.

I think exh hated me for being right again and seeing through his parents carefully crafted facade of happy families.

I am very cynical of people who say they are leaving things to adult children and that grandchildren will get given money from their parents and then when the parents die they will get everything

Just be truthful. You aren’t leaving anything to your grandchildren. The parents aren’t guaranteed to leave anything to their own children. You have to be happy that your gc will end up with nothing.

unfortunately, even if you do get one in the pipeline, Labour have their eyes on it!!

Probably better to plan for your own extended care provision.

My DM spent the last three years of her life in a care home where she died aged 93 - she had dementia and my sibling and I had had a long period of caring for her since her at home. We inherited a substantial amount. I can’t in all honesty say I’d rather still have DM, her death was a release and it felt as though she herself had decided it was time to go. I’m glad she is at peace.

People who say “i inherited loads but I’d rather have that person” don’t seem to get that the vast majority of people will watch their parents die.

No – the vast majority of people don't have to watch their parents die young, which is when that sentiment is said 99% of the time.

My parents never inherited and neither will I or DH. What I have seen is some very toxic behavior from my mother’s sibling where she has orchestrated fall outs to the point where my grandmother has been manipulated into leaving that aunt the sole estate. However my grandmother now needs care but my aunty is refusing to put her in a home (which is what would be best) as she doesn’t what what she is entitled too to be eaten away at. Some aspects of inheritance being about some shocking behaviours.

We’re all doomed

Nothing for us, and nothing to come. Dementia and care homes took the lot on both sides, which does not bode well for DH and me. Therefore have got together house deposits (not enough, £25k each) for dcs and handed them over. Not much else we can do except refuse all healthcare screening (ie. cancer) and hope something other than dementia takes us first.

Unless your parents have loads of assets the only way to have much left over is to have them live with you instead of a care home. A care home may be needed for the last little bit , if nursing or dementia care is needed but often the early years of care could be done in the family.

😂 good for you!

For most people with ordinary incomes and modest homes, if they live long lives with poor health and need care it seems likely that inheritances will be small or non-existent. For people in that category who do inherit something, it’s likely because their parents died younger than the average. Yes, money is helpful, but losing your parents early is often very challenging for a number of reasons.

Our whole society seems in imminent danger of toppling- only those who inherit will improve their material standing, graduate jobs are being decimated by AI, climate-provoked migration and struggle for resources (usually water) is creating huge problems… the whole thing is a nightmare.

Trust me, approaching 70 and dreading putting the heating on or paying for physio isn't much fun.

I have never received any inheritance, there was no money or assets. Never been a problem. My parents legacy is priceless

A friend of mine found out recently that the money left in a signed will to her by her grandmother was taken by her Father. He was the Executor. It wasnt a huge amount (£20k) but he took it all. She only found out after he passed when she was going through paperwork.

Some people dont have any shame or seem to convince themselves THEY deserve it more than you.