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Original poster

To believe we can retire the word "shagging"?

243 replies

ReplacementBusService · 13/10/2025 22:07

I was a teenager in the 90s, and the word for casual, semi casual, or run of the mill sexual congress was "shag", as in "shagging" "have a shag", "quick shag", and "shagged em".

I just think, this word has had its day. It has connotations with vintage rugs, thick carpets, unruly beards, and perhaps panting sheepdogs, that are uncomfortable. Other words exist. I don't want to be the self declared Word Police, and appreciate there will be other points of view on this very important topic, but please can we all consider never using it again?

OP posts:
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5
MyAcornWood · 14/10/2025 10:04

No. You’re fired from the Word Police Force due to gross incompetence.

SprayWhiteDung · 14/10/2025 10:03

Have we actually had 'nookie' yet (in the course of this thread; not asking anybody personally)?!

The gag of 'Nookie Bear' - a supposedly family-friendly variety act with an in-your-face 'wink, wink' aspect for the grown-ups - went on for far too long.

Storynanny1 · 14/10/2025 09:50

when I was a teenager in the early 70’s the only expression I heard was “ having it off”.

brunettemic · 14/10/2025 09:45

You need your own code. When I was (a lot) younger the BF I first slept with when I was in high school and I had a whole thing where we could talk about it in front of our parents or whoever. It wasn’t this code but saying “having chocolate” was having sex, referring to “packets of sweets” meant condoms, oral was “chewing gum” etc. Our code was much better though 😂

SprayWhiteDung · 14/10/2025 09:36

How about 'make some noise' - as in the song Manic Monday?

Mind, I always thought there could have been a big plot-twist in the expected narrative of the song if, instead, it had been "He tells me in his bedroom voice: Sorry, honey, but I prefer boys!" Grin

Nourishinghandcream · 14/10/2025 09:33

It was very much a word when I was at school back in the 70's.
If ever you were pulled up for saying it "but sir, we were talking about the bird".

SprayWhiteDung · 14/10/2025 09:31

Moonless · 14/10/2025 04:12

Oh lord no, that's wrong on too many levels. My Dad is called Roger.

Show quote history

I blame the loose morals of the James Bond films for the big increase in British ruderies - it squarely put the idea in everybody's head to Roger more.

StarlightLady · 14/10/2025 09:31

SparklyCardigan · 13/10/2025 22:12

The trouble is there's no obvious replacement. Fucking is too crude, lovemaking is too twee. So shagging it is, I'm afraid.

We probably should get over ourselves and be comfortable with using “fuck” in its correct and proper context. But as that is most unlikely, l think we are stuck with shag.

What ever happened to the term “bonk”?

MaggieInkcap · 14/10/2025 09:24

JacquesHarlow · 13/10/2025 23:54

The biggest reason why I wholeheartedly agree with the OP @ReplacementBusService can be found in the entirety of this thread, and throughout most of Mumsnet.

There's this weird pervasive thing on Mumsnet that any description of sex HAS to be accompanied with knowing humour. As if no British self-respecting woman (I am British and female btw) could really abandon herself mentally in the act, or be ardent about why sex makes them feel amazing, etc.

Nope. Instead you have to find a way to talk about it in the most bawdry way possible, as if sex is really something silly and to be referred to in the quickest, most dismissive way you can describe. We really are a weird, insecure nation when it comes to sex.

Hence, "shagging" will always win on here. Because as a word and with its 90s connotations, it fits the description and the demographic here, so absolutely perfectly.

Erm. Well done for not being like the other British women and not being like the other Mumsnetters I guess.

Shinyandnew1 · 14/10/2025 09:23

I quite like the word shagging, it's better than fucking.

We used to say 'got off with' at school but that was more snogging (another good word) and a bit of a fondle!

ErrolTheDragon · 14/10/2025 09:07

Cyclistmumgrandma · 14/10/2025 08:59

According to Morcambe and Wise it’s “a bit of way hey and what about the workers?”

But do you keep your socks on?

MaggieInkcap · 14/10/2025 09:05

BlueJuniper94 · 13/10/2025 22:15

"Pumping"?

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Awful

Cyclistmumgrandma · 14/10/2025 08:59

According to Morcambe and Wise it’s “a bit of way hey and what about the workers?”

ErrolTheDragon · 14/10/2025 08:54

Onefortheroad25 · 14/10/2025 08:44

Has anyone mentioned Riding yet? Needs to be said in a thick Dublin accent for best effect.

Many Irish posters!

I don’t think the term is exclusively Irish though is it? I’m pretty sure its a euphemism used in Britain too, though not as commonly.

Middlechild3 · 14/10/2025 08:54

Shagging is a good English word, god forbid it disappears and we have to use 'hook up' like the Americans. Bonk is nice and unoffensive too but rarely heard nowadays.

Idontknowhatnametochoose · 14/10/2025 08:50

A bit of slap and tickle

BarbaraHavers · 14/10/2025 08:49

Has anyone mentioned 'poking' or 'hanky panky'?

Onefortheroad25 · 14/10/2025 08:44

Has anyone mentioned Riding yet? Needs to be said in a thick Dublin accent for best effect.

prelovedusername · 14/10/2025 08:39

Shagging to me means the Carolina shag style of dance. There are lots of YouTube videos where people talk about their love of shagging and how they were introduced to it from a very early age. 😳

elQuintoConyo · 14/10/2025 08:34

Spicy sleep?

At it - as in 'going at it like knives'. ?

A seeing to = I gave him a right seeing to last night.

A game of bury the sausage?

Fuck, when referring to actual fucking, doesn't seem coarse to me. 'Where are my fucking keys?', 'What the fuck did you eat?' (when glaring at the dog through a green haze) = coarse.

Having it off - reminds me of 'have it oeuf' from Bridget Jones, her mother's shop demo job. (scuse possibly poor French spelling).

OnlyOneAdda · 14/10/2025 08:32

Idontknowhatnametochoose · 14/10/2025 08:09

Having it away

Or my ex used to say "giving you a servicing,"

Edited

Gross

HelpMeGetThrough · 14/10/2025 08:31

As the Cornish comedian Jethro used to say…. Giving her a portion

ErrolTheDragon · 14/10/2025 08:31

JacquesHarlow · 14/10/2025 02:29

I don't use any "term" for it, because I'm never referring to it in casual conversation.

That doesn't make me a prude - FAR from it, I have a very healthy approach to the subject and the activity - but since when am I constantly referring to the sexual act?

No. Doesn't happen.

So yeah, good luck to everyone who is constantly chatting about "shagging", sounds great, but I don't really get the conversations you lot have, and why.

Show quote history

I was unclear, I guess - like you I don’t find the topic arises in real life casual conversations. But don’t we all have words or phrases we use with our best beloved?

OnlyFannys · 14/10/2025 08:31

My partner says "giving me a drubbing" but only to annoy me. I call it having a bang but not opposed to a good shag

Sasssquatch · 14/10/2025 08:29

this is the most mn response to anything

Uptightedly chastising everyone else for being uptight 🤣

with a side order of disparaging British people as being unsophisticated (and probably fat and lacking style) too when compared to our more worldly counterparts and a sneer of superiority to top it off. Bravo.

ahhh quote didn’t work. Was in response to jacquesharlow

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