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AIBU?

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I hate my DSD

558 replies

8842688l · 13/10/2025 21:32

There I said it. Got it off my chest

shes a horrible, manipulative, spiteful girl who treats everybody like shit.

nothing more to say just needed to get it off my chest.

OP posts:
Lilington · 13/10/2025 22:04

You have my sympathy OP.
I wonder if those criticising you have experienced what it is like to do your very best for a stepchild for years and get nothing but nastiness back.
15 isn’t a toddler.
Yes of course she needs understanding but at that age she also has a degree of control over her behaviour.
Step mothers aren’t plaster saints. Everyone has their breaking point.
You are allowed to say how you feel.

EchoedSilence · 13/10/2025 22:04

I would imagine the feeling is mutual.

8842688l · 13/10/2025 22:03

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 13/10/2025 21:36

Does she live with you @8842688l?

Have you got any children of your own?

Yes 4 & 6

OP posts:
minipie · 13/10/2025 22:03

Look she’s had her parents split, a stepmother who hates her and a young sibling thrust upon her. I imagine the 3 year old has naturally got most of the attention for the past 3 years due to their age. This is attention seeking behaviour from your DSD writ large.

Your DP needs to spend a LOT of time with her - he needs to try to get to the bottom of her behaviour and tell her it has to stop, but he needs to do this in a context of giving her lots of love and attention.

Maybe you need to move out so he can do that.

8842688l · 13/10/2025 22:02

chloej92 · 13/10/2025 22:00

In fairness you don't have to pretend you could leave, at the end of the day your partner and their DC come are a two so if you can't deal with that then you clearly need to leave.

Children telling untruths does NOT mean psychotic at all.

Some children have complex presentations and that's it.

Do you understand the severity of the allegation?

Lying because you went to drink with your friends in a park but you were somewhere else… normal teenage lies

Anywho you don’t have to tell me twice, we have 2 DC and I can’t imagine allowing them to think this is normal behaviour

OP posts:
roastedrapidly · 13/10/2025 22:02

Take the kids and leave OP, I would.

Diarygirlqueen · 13/10/2025 22:01

Awful thing to say about any child, especially one in your family.

MummytoE · 13/10/2025 22:01

I feel for you OP, can you leave? What's the set up?

chloej92 · 13/10/2025 22:00

8842688l · 13/10/2025 21:54

Yes it is, but I said it and now I feel tonnes better for saying it. Ah I can breathe again rather than live a life of pretending

In fairness you don't have to pretend you could leave, at the end of the day your partner and their DC come are a two so if you can't deal with that then you clearly need to leave.

Children telling untruths does NOT mean psychotic at all.

Some children have complex presentations and that's it.

Wolfiefan · 13/10/2025 21:59

A 15 year old is a child. I’m guessing she’s been manipulated and been treated like shit. And that is why she acts as she does.
if you hate her then get out of her life and let those who love her parent her.

8842688l · 13/10/2025 21:59

Londonrach1 · 13/10/2025 21:57

If you feel like this you need to end the relationship with her parent. Poor kid. She's been throw into living with an adult who can't stand her

Ah here’s another, I was actually pro DSD for a long time but after some real unforgivable stuff. I’ve clocked out…

OP posts:
Thehop · 13/10/2025 21:59

Do you have to see her often? Can you go out? For a bath? Run errands or go to bed and read?

not that you should have to, but at least it's peace!

8842688l · 13/10/2025 21:58

CountFucula · 13/10/2025 21:55

Sounds like she knows you hate her then…

Guys sorry I was just here to release some much needed steam. I don’t actually care who thinks I’m unreasonable…

Imagine your other children being subjected to an investigation by social services because of a sick lie. Sorry, never going to win me over. It’s unforgivable

OP posts:
BeMintFatball · 13/10/2025 21:58

15 prime cunty age. This will pass. I’m sure she will be lovely by 19. Hang in there

Lex345 · 13/10/2025 21:58

Children are incredibly perceptive, she will probably pick up on how you feel about her.

I am assuming she is just a child. Of course she will get things wrong/ misbehave/challenge authority etc at points. Pretty sure all children do to varying degrees.

Its very sad that such a significant person in her life-and step parents are significant-feels like this.

Londonrach1 · 13/10/2025 21:57

If you feel like this you need to end the relationship with her parent. Poor kid. She's been throw into living with an adult who can't stand her

8842688l · 13/10/2025 21:56

RoseAlone · 13/10/2025 21:55

I'm guessing that with your attitude she's none too keen on you either. Poor kid.

Poor kid, HA.

OP posts:
CountFucula · 13/10/2025 21:55

8842688l · 13/10/2025 21:53

She told authorities we were neglecting her which got investigated and of course found this wasn’t the case, I’m pretty sure that leans on the side of psychotic

Sounds like she knows you hate her then…

RoseAlone · 13/10/2025 21:55

I'm guessing that with your attitude she's none too keen on you either. Poor kid.

8842688l · 13/10/2025 21:55

15

OP posts:
8842688l · 13/10/2025 21:54

Wolfiefan · 13/10/2025 21:35

Wow. That is hateful. How old is she? Does
sne live with you?

Yes it is, but I said it and now I feel tonnes better for saying it. Ah I can breathe again rather than live a life of pretending

OP posts:
Dartmoorcheffy · 13/10/2025 21:54

Her age is extremely relevant here

Wolfiefan · 13/10/2025 21:54

Age?
She told who? What?

MummytoE · 13/10/2025 21:54

She must be under 18 then

8842688l · 13/10/2025 21:53

She told authorities we were neglecting her which got investigated and of course found this wasn’t the case, I’m pretty sure that leans on the side of psychotic

OP posts:
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