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Original poster

To find 'pet' names unprofessional in CS?

216 replies

BigFatBully · 13/10/2025 17:24

Am I being unreasonable to find the usage of pet names by customer service staff unprofessional?

I am the customer and a stranger, I expect to be treated with respect. My name isn't sweetheart, it isn't love, honey, darling or sweetie.

I think pet names are fine for family members, spouses or CLOSE friends. Am I being unreasonable to think there is a time and a place for such familiarity?

OP posts:
Theresabatinmykitchen · 13/10/2025 18:07

BigFatBully · 13/10/2025 17:27

I hasten to add, we were in a bar the other day and my husband was referred to as "pal". I said to the bartender, "how do you know my husband for him to be your pal?"

It is often said on here you can judge someone by the way they treat retail or wait staff, I think your username suits you perfectly.

TypeyMcTypeface · 13/10/2025 18:07

CS staff aren't paid enough to justify altering their habitual speech patterns.

Yourmywifenow · 13/10/2025 18:07

NoSoupForU · 13/10/2025 17:31

Are you actually Hyacinth Bucket? Or do you just aspire to be?

Show quote history

🤣.

Absentosaur · 13/10/2025 18:07

YABU. Try being a radiator rather than a hoover. Your life will change almost immediately.

ChocolateCinderToffee · 13/10/2025 18:05

Would you like mere staff to grovel a bit too?

QuickPeachPoet · 13/10/2025 18:05

BigFatBully · 13/10/2025 17:27

I hasten to add, we were in a bar the other day and my husband was referred to as "pal". I said to the bartender, "how do you know my husband for him to be your pal?"

How horribly patronising. So he didn't even say it to you and you butted in just to prove your sad little point.

MyAcornWood · 13/10/2025 18:05

What a miserable existence, to be looking for such offence in every nook and cranny of life and human interaction.

Knowsley · 13/10/2025 18:05

Cynic17 · 13/10/2025 17:38

Of course it's unprofessional, not to mention patronising. These people aren't friends, so why should they be "friendly"? If they really can't bear to use Sir or Madam, then they just don't need to call customers by a name at all.

This.
Darling is the one that irritates me the most.

Ooogle · 13/10/2025 18:04

You surely did not say that to the barman….your husband must have cringed so much

tripleginandtonic · 13/10/2025 18:04

You're sounding like Margot from the Good Life. Yabu.

Wishimaywishimight · 13/10/2025 18:03

Interesting username 😆

Geordie01 · 13/10/2025 18:02

BigFatBully · 13/10/2025 17:27

I hasten to add, we were in a bar the other day and my husband was referred to as "pal". I said to the bartender, "how do you know my husband for him to be your pal?"

hahahahahahaha calm down pet. With this you come across as, I can’t even sugar coat it, an absolute cunt 😂. She’s not going to be back now she’s had her miserable arse handing to her is she!

Spidey66 · 13/10/2025 18:01

You’re a bundle of joy, ain’t you? Doesn’t bother me in the slightest.

MoominMai · 13/10/2025 18:00

I’m 52, have lived alone much of my life and have no friends/family so I actually quite like being addressed that way. I look pretty young for my age and get referred to as love, hun, sweet etc here in the Midlands even by young women barely out their 20s it seems. I think it’s very human and just lovely myself. It makes me feel even if the person said it unconsciously, there was a micro connection there which in my world of isolation means a lot!

PixieandMe · 13/10/2025 17:59

BigFatBully · 13/10/2025 17:27

I hasten to add, we were in a bar the other day and my husband was referred to as "pal". I said to the bartender, "how do you know my husband for him to be your pal?"

Oh, chill out, that’s an absolutely horrible way to treat someone who has served you. SO unkind.

Also, look up the definition of pet name because you don’t understand it!

Fairywingsandroses · 13/10/2025 17:58

BigFatBully · 13/10/2025 17:27

I hasten to add, we were in a bar the other day and my husband was referred to as "pal". I said to the bartender, "how do you know my husband for him to be your pal?"

You sound a bit unpleasant, tbh, so I do think people are in the wrong for calling you a pet name.

Placestogo · 13/10/2025 17:58

Im not british but i think this is cute. As ive grown older fewer people are calling me “love” or “flower” and it’s a shame! Makes my day! (Maybe it feels a bit exotic to me and fun!)
sometimes young men will say “man” in their conversation with me, im not bothered, i feel they must be telaxed enough around me to use that so its good

HelenaWaiting · 13/10/2025 17:57

I strongly recommend you brush the chip off your shoulder. Pet.

Cosyblankets · 13/10/2025 17:56

BigFatBully · 13/10/2025 17:27

I hasten to add, we were in a bar the other day and my husband was referred to as "pal". I said to the bartender, "how do you know my husband for him to be your pal?"

No you didn't

Namechangerage · 13/10/2025 17:55

Pal, love, darling are all fine. Especially in certain areas where it’s part of the dialect.

Namechangerage · 13/10/2025 17:55

BigFatBully · 13/10/2025 17:27

I hasten to add, we were in a bar the other day and my husband was referred to as "pal". I said to the bartender, "how do you know my husband for him to be your pal?"

You sound delightful 🤣

Arlanymor · 13/10/2025 17:55

I would rather engage with a friendly person using informal language, than a starchy robot. People look for offence where there is none - honestly it’s a modern disease.

And for the record I would hate to be called ‘Madam’… I don’t run a brothel. See it works both ways doesn’t it my lovely?!

Craftysue · 13/10/2025 17:54

I'm from the Midlands and most people use my love or mate- it really doesn't bother me at all , in fact I think it's nice

Arlanymor · 13/10/2025 17:53

BigFatBully · 13/10/2025 17:27

I hasten to add, we were in a bar the other day and my husband was referred to as "pal". I said to the bartender, "how do you know my husband for him to be your pal?"

How disgusting of ‘serving staff’ to refer to the pair of you as anything but Lord and Lady Uptheirownbumingtons.

It wasn’t rude, it wasn’t disrespectful, it was a colloquialism. It wasn’t unpleasant, it wasn’t patronising, it was a friendly comment.

DontBuyANewMumCashmere · 13/10/2025 17:52

I am a (female) police officer and alternate between calling people Sir/Madam, mate, pal, lovely, my love...
I don't ever use sweetheart, may use darling to a younger girl but not often, really. I knew a very sweeter older officer who used to address everyone as 'darling'

I do this because in some situations you want to signal that you're there to help them and a pet name can ease them and convey that quickly; we often need to transmit numerous urgent meanings in a very short space of time.

If someone was trying to talk down to me I'd see what you were saying, but I think there is a time and a place for gentle non-gender-specific pet names.

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