To leave a teaching position with 4 kids to wfh for half the pay

@Catseyesgrey this. You clearly need to leave this job but you equally need to have a good look at the bigger picture here including the school's perspective. If you keep alienating people with unreasonable expectations.and sensitivities you will make yourself unemployable particularly in education. If you want to be an EP you will need to develop a lot more empathy to work with children and their responsible adults in and out of school.

What were the complaints you received from your head of department.

As a previous poster said, fully remote charity positions are incredibly sought after- I recently recruited to one and we had 500 applicants for 1 position- two thirds of whom were relevantly qualified and experienced.

So, whilst I wish you luck, I think perhaps you also need to work out how to resolve the issues you keep having where you are.

I’m not sure that everything the school has done is incorrect either such as sending emails.

Also, regarding the new job. You write as if you’ve been offered it. It’s a tough job market out there, so don’t count your chickens.

Why is his age relevant?

I doubt they gave you a ‘bad report’ as how would have you got a new job? Full time permanent teaching can be very different from supply teaching.
It sounds like you started a new job then went off sick after the first week. Your allegations that you were being bullied sound a little premature if this is the case as bullying is repeated behaviours. Regarding your disability, have you actually received a formal diagnosis of autism? If you want your line manager to make reasonable adjustments, how can that happen if you won’t discuss it? Having everything recorded via email makes perfect sense to me as it creates a paper trail for both parties should there be any dispute or misunderstanding.

Regarding the possible new job, just remember that you will need to provide references from your current employer.

Truthfully….you sound like a fucking nightmare to work with. I think you need some resilience training at the very least and need to do some self reflection. Maybe some a life/work coach that specialises in Autism.

Everyone in my office is neurodivergent, we all have strengths and weaknesses and support each other. It sounds like the school were trying to support you and yet you threw that back at them.

It certainly sounds as though relationships in your current school have broken down and that it isn't the right environment for you.

You mention pursuing a career as an Ed Psych. I've worked very closely with many Ed Psych's and it can be a busy, stressful and emotionally taxing role. It seems that receiving feedback can be particularly difficult for you, so it's worth keeping in mind that Ed Psych reports can be contentious at times, parents sometimes get upset if the content of a report doesn't align with their views of a child's needs or difficulties. Schools may also give you honest feedback on your assessments and any training you deliver, and you will of course be observed and given feedback throughout your training. Being able to build and maintain positve relationships at work is absolutely essential to the role of an Ed Psych so whilst you may be getting a raw deal in your current school, I do think pp who have encouraged some self-reflection are right to do so.

You don’t sound very suited for teaching. 4 weeks off not much help for the children you are meant to be educating.

You sound like a bit of a nightmare, to be honest, and that's from just reading your account. Schools are under a lot of pressure, and on top of everything else they have to arrange cover for you when you're off on stress leave because something upset you. If you think you'd find the new job less stressful, and money isn't a big issue for you, I'd go for the new job. It sounds as though it would give you more flexibility too, which is helpful when you have 4 children (to cover illness, etc).

With respect OP, the common denominator here is you. You dont sound suited for any role that comes with a modicum of stress or criticism and seem to be under the misapprehemsion that jobs you hold owe you 100% flexibility due to your needs and circumstances, they do not.

The idea that you would take a full time job and try to squeeze it in morning and nights to avoid childcare is, frankly, outrageous.

You, however, owe them your role done correctly, you're not delivering, nor will you likely ever until you either learn to handle stress and feedback better, or you get a role that means you can leave the job at the door, but i surmise they don't pay enough for you.

Management today is incredibly hard due to the entitlement of todays workforce.

I left teaching in similar circumstances and so did my husband, in order to work from home. Holidays are occasionally fiddly with childcare but we muddle through. We would not go back to teaching for any amount of money, ever. We are much, much happier.

@Catseyesgrey this. You clearly need to leave this job but you equally need to have a good look at the bigger picture here including the school's perspective. If you keep alienating people with unreasonable expectations.and sensitivities you will make yourself unemployable particularly in education. If you want to be an EP you will need to develop a lot more empathy to work with children and their responsible adults in and out of school.

4 weeks off and this many issues in 2 weeks of actual work.... There's a common denominator.

There's a lot to unpick in your post but I would suggest that this is not the right school for you.

You disclosed a disability and the HoD/someone tried to suggest adjustments. Email often works as a starting point because the person can digest the information and have a think before replying. It won't have been done to be nasty.

I don't know what the 'complaints' are that the HoD raised - as a HoD myself, it's never a nice conversation to have but issues do need addressing.

There seem to have been an awful lot of issues in the space of 6 weeks! And you were off sick for 4 of those which will have impacted the students and the HoD. Sometimes it can't be helped but this seems to have been off the back of one email that could have been resolved by speaking to people and setting up a plan.

It sounds like things got off to a bad start at the interview stage!

Whether you will get the charity job, I don't know but either way, I would strongly suggest you resign and leave your current school. Perhaps return to supply if that worked well.

So you've had issues in your previous school too?

Also, why does it matter if a HOD is young? My HOD is really young and he is brilliant. I'm 20 years older than him!

Don't forget supply is different to a permanent teaching job. Supply usually teach a pre planned lesson, crowd control etc... whereas permanent teachers have huge responsibilities.

It sounds to me like perhaps teaching just isn't for you? It took a friend of mine 10 years to realise that! She tried 3 different schools and supply. You need thick skin and not to take things personally.

Your alternative job sounds like it might work much better for you.

ECTs already have QTS.

I'm afraid I think the likelihood of you getting the job you have applied for is exceptionally low. The charity sector jobs market is in an awful state withfew jobs and even lower pay than there used to be. Jobs like you are describing tend to get snapped up by someone with significant marketing and sector specific experience. Unless the role calls for a qualified teacher I would suggest keeping expectations very low.

As an ND parent with two ND children I would also say that the age your kids are can be very tricky. Transitions to high school in particular. I personally wouldbt manage to work ft and I only have two kids (with a million and one meetings between them now).

Sounds like you are now in the job from hell. Unless it would cause considerable financial strain go for the new job.

This
It would be interesting to hear your line managers POV

Sounds like a good move to reduce the stress. If you needed to earn extra cash, could you do some tutoring? I’ve even heard from another tutor that there is more of a demand now for day tutoring as well as after school tutoring for SEN pupils who can’t manage school. Something to think about maybe

Where’s your union in all of this?