MIL wants to do my kids Christmas stockings…again

These replies are mad to me. I would bite anyone's hand off if they offered to take some of the Christmas admin off me!

But OP if you really are set on doing your own then do one for at home and let MIL do one for at hers. Doesn't need to be a big deal.

I disagree. As OP's MIL puts herself first throughout the year, prioritising travel and holidays over seeing her grandchildren, I'm not sure why she should have priority over OP when it coming to choosing the gifts for the Christmas stocking. OP knows what her children would like, MIL doesn't care.

If she doesn't like how mil does Christmas she has the option of staying home and doing her own Christmas. Perhaps moving the event to her house. Just a thought

As grandma only sees them once a year, weather its her choice or not) let her have the stocking .. she enjoys sewing them, the run up to christmas is exciting for her, she obviously loves doing this part ...

Grandma wont always be here and in years to come wont your children remember the fact that grandma loved doing that, and they loved receiving...

Im on grandma's side sorry x

As my DC’s got older our trick was if we ever had to endure someone else's Christmas Day, we’d still have our own Christmas Day too where we do all the things our way. It would usually be on Boxing Day or the day after.

Erm... it gives her pleasure it gives the grandkids pleasure, what's the big deal?
Can you do your own for your child before you go and explain that FC visits all houses? Children keep up the pretence of 'believing' for a long time, trust me as a mum of 5 adult kids...they've told me

I love doing my kids stockings and wouldn’t let anyone take over that. But both my ex MIL (bitch) and my current MIL (lovely) love(d) to do them for my kids too. So they do. Like a bonus one. Always been the way and I can live with this because mine are better. ExMIL scoffed at me for always putting pants and socks in the stockings (it’s a sort of tradition from my own childhood) but she put toothpaste in her ones for the kids. Weirdo.

I would keep it as light as possible but no nonsense: tell her I’ll be sorting my kids stockings this year.

Was going to say leave one at home for when they go home after christmas

Can you do them and leave them at home, so when you come home, Santa has left them an extra one to open.

When we travel to MIL for xmas every other year, I let her do what she wants and then when we get home Santa has aways left something at our house and we do our own thing. The kids love it and I get to do what I want.

Then they all need to chat like I said earlier. It’s not unreasonable to change the status quo, it is to only do so for 3/10 children.

Can I just say, as a Granny I do the stockings. I suggested it to my three girls and their DHs. They were all thrilled that I’d relieved them of one less stress at Christmas. I make up eight stockings for ages between five and ten. I’m not going to lie, it’s a struggle and I start looking out for little bits and bobs in the January sales. I also look for stuff when I’m on holiday too. The children know the stockings are made up by Granny and the parents are happy because the stocking opening happens in the dead of night, giving them a little extra time in bed.

There must be a compromise here somewhere OP?

Making your kids the brat cousins!

Just say I've brought the kids presents that they asked Santa for. They will open them when they wake up as that's what we want to do.

I agree. They are your children - you get to do the stocking. Mil can give them an “extra” stocking if she likes. I’d try and keep the real stocking (your one) hidden, but there’s no need to worry if your children talk about it. If any of the other children ask about it just act casual. You don’t know why they got two stockings, basically. There are no hard and fast rules about what Father Christmas may or may not do.

Did your MIL get to do ALL her children's stockings when she was the mother of young children? If yes, then she is waaaaay overstepping. (If no, she is also overstepping, but it's more understandable).

You could offer to solve this problem by no longer going to her house for Christmas. She probably wouldn't like this but the compromise would be that you go, but you do the stockings for your own kids.

That's not how I've read OP's limited posts. I've read it as she thinks the cousins might realise they are getting less and be annoyed but she doesn't know that. She thinks MIL might be hurt if she rejects her stocking but doesn't know that. It's all mountain out of a molehill. If she wants to biy extra stuff and stick it in MIL's stocking she should just do it if it matters that much to her.

I doubt MIL sees it as the power play it's being portrayed as but just a nice thing she's doing.

She’s clearly been made to feel very uncomfortable and unwelcome to buy her own kids Christmas stockings.
That’s not ok

I assumed it was questions from the other child, not from another adult.

Why question her? The absolute insanity of “questioning” a woman buying her own kids fucking Christmas stocking is wild.

Completely agree. I just see it as a chore I don't have to cover so no, if OP raised it with me I wouldn't be in agreement with her at all and would be a bit annoyed I know had to do something extra. OP can do the extra bit if she wants to. It's so not an issue

I don't think you can guarantee that. I personally would be perfectly unfussed - quite pleased, indeed- if someone else did my children's christmas stockings. While I'm not surprised that some people like doing it more than I do, I am genuinely amazed that anyone sees it as 'the best part of parenting', let alone the multiple people on this thread!

Instead of stocking could you do a present box Christmas morning from yourselves so kids can open bits and play with them before going downstairs to open stockings

I would do a Xmas eve book instead so your kids have the little bits personal to them and leave the stocking that year, may cause issues between cousins and with grandma and just not worth it.

’frothed’?

FFS

& it’s hardly an ‘unspoken’ convention that parents who choose to do the santa tradition provide the gifts for DC.

You want this to resolve withiut any form of communication or potential conflict.

Ok.