She’s as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside” is that ok?

Write it all in the card. My kids are now 19 and 21. I didn’t put anything re 16/18/21 birthdays on social media. But told them all my loving thoughts in a card. It can be done!

Beautiful on the inside and out is really cringe and has become such a cliche. I love the idea of writing a letter (and am absolutely stealing that idea) - why not just say you're proud of her and post a nice photo.

i personally hate that specific phrase. It just feels fake to me. And as an autistic person with a fairly literally It just makes me wonder what inside a persons skin looks like.
but thats me, and I’m not your daughter. The question is will SHE like it if you write that? If you think she will- do it, if not then dont.
basically what I’m saying is do what she wilk
lile and no one else’s opinion matters.

I’m not entirely sure why you’re getting such shitty replies @CandleMug. You get a poster that posts something ‘edgy’ because they want to bring somebody down and then you get a herd mentality and they all pile on.
Meanwhile back in the real world, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with posting your original thoughts, lots and lots of people do. Well my friends do anyway!
You know your daughter so post whatever you want to! Oh and happy 18th to your daughter

😂

It’s absolutely fine to do this, OP. Please ignore the general misery on here.
I mean, how patronising is it to tell the OP ‘buck the SM trend and wish her happy birthday in person.’
Like it’s not possible to do both 🙄
I hope your beautiful daughter enjoys her celebrations and birthday wishes 😁

No they don’t - they focus on the whole person the person who is funny, kind, loyal to their friends, has worked hard to achieve their academic/sporting goals etc.

Let’s put it this way - would you labour that your 18yo son was as handsome on the inside as he is on the outside? Because I have never in my 50odd years seen a post talking about ‘my pretty/handsome son’.

Saying that you are proud of her and she's a wonderful daughter etc... sounds a lot better than talking about her looks which are just down to genetics. Making her appearance a focus can also put a lot of pressure on her and make her feel that her value is conditional on being seen as "beautiful" that type of pressure is pretty unhealthy and can lead to problems like eating disorders or a need for constant validation. I have friends whose parents focused on their good looks a lot while they were growing up and it has been quite damaging for them in various ways. There is enough pressure from our sexist society regarding women's looks without parents adding more. I'm sure you know this deep down as a woman yourself.

It could be taken as a compliment but also could be ambiguous, if you want to dig deeper…if she’s not beautiful inside then she’s not beautiful on the outside…there’s nothing to measure against.

reminds me of a Simpson’s episode where Lurleen tells Homer he’s as smart as he is handsome and Homer takes it as an insult because he thinks he’s not handsome

I don't see anything wrong with it to be honest. Parents are allowed to be a bit cringe and soppy sometimes, especially on an 18th.

It's not like you're standing up in the middle of a party and giving a 30 minute speech about how wonderful and pretty she is in front of her mates. It's a Facebook post that will be seen by mostly your friends. Say what you want.

Listen to your heart and say what you, as her mother wants to say. I think that sounds perfectly ok. I also have a teenage daughter.Enjoy the celebrations.x

Why put on SM? Just give her a card.

Why put a message at all? So all YOUR friends can wish her happy birthday? 🤨
I have never never understood why people do that on their page, it feels incredibly self indulgent.

Eh?

If you thought someone was ugly and said they were as beautiful on the inside as they are on the outside you would be calling them a crappy person. This makes no sense.

I totally agree. I very rarely use social media other than a couple of forums like this, and cant imagine my daughter ever having wanted me or my husband as Facebook friends or being linked on any other platform. 🤣🤣

Ignoring the SM aspect - I’ve always assumed As beautiful on the inside as on the outside is the 21st century equivalent of She has a lovely smile. I.E - something men, and other people’s mothers, say about a woman they do not consider attractive.

Someone once wrote it in a birthday card to me - and I felt pretty offended, (even though I was more than twice their age.)

Just because you have SM doesn’t mean you should fill it with any old tosh. Write something meaningful, or stick to Happy Birthday.

I think it's awful that what should be personal between you and your daughter is plastered over social media for all the world to see, including people who really couldn't give a toss whether it's her birthday.

Write what you feel about her in a letter or card, write it from the heart, not worrying about how your words would go down in public.

I have 2 children in their thirties, on their 18th birthdays I wrote them each a letter telling them of my thoughts and feelings about their attributes, I did a similar thing on their 30th birthdays as of course their lives had changed so much by then. I know they both have kept those letters, as I keep cards from them which they have sent me for Mothers' Day and birthdays, telling me what they appreciate about me.

These handwritten, personal messages do not need to be seen on social media and it would be utterly awful if such heartfelt feelings had been shared publicly.

Your love and admiration for your daughter isn't more meaningful if you put it on social media, I'd say it actually becomes less so.

What about beautiful inside and out?

Why do you have to put anything on 'Social Media'??

The whole thing makes me cringe - as well as the fact you are asking strangers what to write about your own daughter.

I put a post on Facebook for my daughter’s 18th saying Happy Birthday, how proud I was of her etc with a few photos from when she was born up to her 18th. The following year when the memories pop up I realised she had untagged herself 🤣🤣. Not all teenagers appreciate gushing social media posts lol.

Your post was so poorly constructed, i'm struggling to believe it wasn't written by some randy teenage lad.
Please read the play: "Linda." You might be enlightened.
My boy and girl twins will be 18 at the end of this month. I'm immensly proud of them, and yes - they're talented and beautiful. No way I'd cheapen them by creating a show boating thread on here, or plastering them all over social media.
This really is all about feeding your ego isn't it?! Gordon Bennett!

Write her a personal birthday card/letter, tell her how proud you are of her etc etc. list her characteristics that delight you, nicer I think, than the over effusive
public announcement. Other people I suggest do not see her how you do.

Less soppy.
:If she could see herself through my eyes, she would know how special she is, inside and out"?
I hope you both have a lovely day..

If you’re going to mention her looks and add a photo, don’t put a duck faced, filtered photo on, those are very cringeworthy.
i do think mentioning her being beautiful never goes down well, it immediately sets her up to be judged, either people disagree and think you’re delusional or they’ll agree and think you’re braggy, and that will reflect in her, people will assume that she thinks the same. If you want to tell her to her face she’s beautiful that’s much nicer.

No there is no need to say this or anything like it on social media