Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I right to regret ever sleep walking into becoming my partners carer?

308 replies

RakshaUK · 11/10/2025 20:17

It started with getting up in the early hours to help him put his socks on to go to work. Then he developed leg ulcers, so showers became a performance because the dressing on the ulcers couldn't get wet, so I had to help putting a waterproof sleeve over them.
Then, about 15 years ago he started to develop a lump in his groin, GP thought it was a lipoma, said it could be removed when it became a problem. About 5 years ago - 2020 it was limiting his mobility to such an extent he couldn't walk from his disabled parking space to his desk (they did look at moving his desk under reasonable adjustments but it wasn't thought to be reasonable because they IT dept needed to be able to communicate easily). So the week before we went into lockdown, he took early retirement!
Basically he sat in his chair all day, wouldn't do anything else, and complained that he was losing his mobility. I pointed out on an almost daily basis that if he didn't use it, he'd lose it. GP sent a lovely chap to try and motivate him, he'd agree to all the tasks, then not do anything about them.
He's been referred to 3 different surgeons with regard to the removal of the lump (which is now so big it hangs like a good sized pumpkin between his knees), one took a look at his belly, which hangs infront of it after losing about 5 stone, and declared it was a pannus not a lipoma!
We've since moved and our current surgery are trying to get a MultiDisciplinaryTeammeeting together, including him, and me to act as his advocate, since July! He's spent 4 weeks in hospital with cellulitis.
What is really getting to me is his attitude towards me. E seems to do as little as possible and leaves me to clear up after him.I'm not one of nature's nurses, I feel like a caged animal listening to his moans and cries, and of course he must feel worse...
So WHY WONT HE DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT?
Even his nurses say he's got to be a squeaky wheel and on the phone to the GP Surgery every day. He does nothing to help himself, or me. I'm 65, older than him, with my own mobility issues (I use a power chair outside if I have to), I'm also type 2 diabetic and recently diagnosed ADHD and Autistic. I also have many incidents of trauma in my life which haven't all been put to bed. His nurse today suggested he make me a cup of tea every day (I have a shower stool out there to sit on when I'm cooking or washing up that he could use) doing that would double his step count for the day!
He passes wind, and doesn't apologise. He leaves shitty finger prints every where (he will go to the toilet for poos, but doesn't wash his hands) Wees he has to do by standing up while I shove a washing up bowl underneath him (the lump means he sprays wee everywhere and dribbles if he's anywhere near wanting to go when he walks) He can't wear underwear or incontinence pads because of the lump, trousers are a thing of the past, so he has a blanket across his knees to hide everything.
I like our house, i like sharing it with my two dogs and two cats. I have just had it up to here with being his carer.

OP posts:
Kendodd · 14/10/2025 17:59

Tweedled · 14/10/2025 15:24

You need a social worker to help him get aids for the home so he can move around independently. They might direct you to a department of your local council who deals with the occupational health equipment.
I would ring your local council for detail of how to get a social worker.

From the OPs posts, I don't think he'd use the mobility aids.

Kendodd · 14/10/2025 17:57

Only read a few posts but this man sounds like the creator of his own disability.

RakshaUK · 14/10/2025 17:50

Needspaceforlego · 14/10/2025 16:20

Op how did he manage in hospital?
We he peeing all over the ward?

Your house must stink, if hes dribbling urine everywhere.

The lump shrunk dramatically and they would put a urine bottle over the outlet which was visible when the lump was lifted.
I struggled hard to make sure it doesn't stink I can assure you. He wees before he goes to the living room and again before he goes to bed. His chair is protected by washable covers which i try to make sure are changed regularly. I've washed my hands (so to speak) of his bedroom after replacing the mattress and all the bed linen in early September.

OP posts:
RakshaUK · 14/10/2025 17:40

Tweedled · 14/10/2025 15:24

You need a social worker to help him get aids for the home so he can move around independently. They might direct you to a department of your local council who deals with the occupational health equipment.
I would ring your local council for detail of how to get a social worker.

He's had several OT visits to try and find solutions. Because he needs bariatrics equipment, it's generally too big for the bungalow and he struggled to use it effectively...he currently uses one of a pair of walking sticks he was given in hospital a couple of years ago. The other one was lost on his most recent visit to hospital. The large pumpkin size lump, and now the slowly increasing pannus (as he looses weight) really hinder him, throwing his balance off and putting a strain on his hips and knees.

OP posts:
Needspaceforlego · 14/10/2025 16:20

Op how did he manage in hospital?
We he peeing all over the ward?

Your house must stink, if hes dribbling urine everywhere.

jeaux90 · 14/10/2025 16:13

He’ll be dead soon OP at this rate. He is ridiculously young to be so bloody useless. I’d be fuming. (I would have left years ago though)

Needspaceforlego · 14/10/2025 16:08

Op I'm glad you are asking for help.
It gives you a break and it might also force him to do more.

He doesn't care about the shit on his hands when its you thats cleaning it up. He just might care when its a stranger whos cleaning up after him.

It might also force him to chase the hospital for reason why the Op hasn't happened.

Skybluepinky · 14/10/2025 15:41

You don’t have to be, you can leave.

Tweedled · 14/10/2025 15:24

You need a social worker to help him get aids for the home so he can move around independently. They might direct you to a department of your local council who deals with the occupational health equipment.
I would ring your local council for detail of how to get a social worker.

RakshaUK · 14/10/2025 15:20

GirlonaCloud · 14/10/2025 15:04

Maybe call the GP surgery and ask for the number? Their recommendation = they should have the details.

Well done on the counselling move :)

Thanks, I don't make phone calls, so I need an email. I've found it and told them I need someone for a few days and what they will need to do. Reminded them I've not had any respite in the 18 years I've been caring.

OP posts:
GirlonaCloud · 14/10/2025 15:04

RakshaUK · 14/10/2025 14:33

Yes, he has no control when he stands up.
Dr basically said it should contact Social Care for Adults. I'm struggling to find an email address for them.
But, i have arranged to start counselling.

Maybe call the GP surgery and ask for the number? Their recommendation = they should have the details.

Well done on the counselling move :)

RakshaUK · 14/10/2025 14:33

GirlonaCloud · 14/10/2025 14:17

?

How does that work?

Are you saying he can't hold on to get to the shower?

You said you had an appt yesterday with the doctor- was there any outcome?

Yes, he has no control when he stands up.
Dr basically said it should contact Social Care for Adults. I'm struggling to find an email address for them.
But, i have arranged to start counselling.

OP posts:
saraclara · 14/10/2025 14:31

Put him in the building in the garden. It's not like he moves from the sofa, so he doesn't need a whole house.

(Apologies if that's already been suggested - there's a Mumsnet bug that's preventing me reading long threads)

GirlonaCloud · 14/10/2025 14:17

RakshaUK · 14/10/2025 14:05

He can't get to the shower without dribbling on the living room carpet.

?

How does that work?

Are you saying he can't hold on to get to the shower?

You said you had an appt yesterday with the doctor- was there any outcome?

RakshaUK · 14/10/2025 14:05

Needspaceforlego · 14/10/2025 10:55

Op he does sound like he can do a WHOLE lot more for himself than he does. The nurses are saying he should make himself tea.
Washing his hands, cleaning himself.

I dont know why he doesnt pee in the shower then rinse the shower rather than you faffing with a basin.

You absolutely should go away for a some time. Leave him to it.
Its almost like the more you do the more he expects you to do.

Edited

He can't get to the shower without dribbling on the living room carpet.

OP posts:
Needspaceforlego · 14/10/2025 10:55

Op he does sound like he can do a WHOLE lot more for himself than he does. The nurses are saying he should make himself tea.
Washing his hands, cleaning himself.

I dont know why he doesnt pee in the shower then rinse the shower rather than you faffing with a basin.

You absolutely should go away for a some time. Leave him to it.
Its almost like the more you do the more he expects you to do.

maryberrysbaconbible · 14/10/2025 10:47

NEC - just go. Leave him to the consequences of not helping himself.

Maybe you could book a few nights on a hotel. He - not you - can arrange respite care.

RakshaUK · 14/10/2025 10:34

Needspaceforlego · 14/10/2025 00:17

Op it definitely sounds like you need therapy to get what you want out of life.

You boys keeping there distance, there has to be a WHOLE lot more to it than not rocking up for school shows and parents night.

Op do you see much of the boys, any of them?
Is it possible for you to go and have a few days away with them?
Give yourself some breathing space.

I used those things as examples, he was like a lodger, not really involved in their lives at all apart from paying for things.
The boys will come up maybe 3 times a year, sometimes en masses, sometimes individually. We try to get together over Christmas, but they have their own lives, two of them have partners, so their plans have to be taken into account. And two of them work shifts that mean they're not free every Christmas day.
We have a family FB Message group, but their Dad rarely contributes, might tell me to send congratulations is something good happens, but that's pretty much the extent of his involvement. All three of them will phone me approximately once a month, but it's not a formal arrangement. I don't get to visit them because it's not practical to leave him for more than 4 hours. I booked a trip to the NEC so months ago, now I'm not sure I will be able to go.

OP posts:
Needspaceforlego · 14/10/2025 00:17

Op it definitely sounds like you need therapy to get what you want out of life.

You boys keeping there distance, there has to be a WHOLE lot more to it than not rocking up for school shows and parents night.

Op do you see much of the boys, any of them?
Is it possible for you to go and have a few days away with them?
Give yourself some breathing space.

RakshaUK · 13/10/2025 18:24

GirlonaCloud · 13/10/2025 16:36

I don't know why you have stayed with him for so long.
He doesn't appear to have been a good father at all.
Why did you stay with him when he treated your sons like that?

He's not asking any questions about his possible surgery and this has gone on for years.

Seriously, you mentioned you have had your own issues over the years (not just health.) It may be a good idea to invest in some private counselling. You appear to come over as a 'rescuer' trying to sort out someone's life when they won't help themselves.

I'm sorry you are dealing with this, but you've set the bar very low.. Maybe because of your own lack of confidence? Being your sons' biological father isn't the be all and end all of a relationship.

Maybe talk to someone professionally about where you go with all of this. You could do with some help to up your self-worth.

Edited

I totally get what you are saying, and agree with a lot of it, I am a 'rescuers and a people pleaser, goes way back to being adopted and having a dysfunctional family that rotated about keeping Dad, who i adored, happy and keeping aware of his mood, ready to take cover if necessary.
I stayed with him because he had a good job and things were OK. And now they aren't, I dont know what to do.
Private therapy is probably a very good idea. Thank you.

OP posts:
RakshaUK · 13/10/2025 18:18

maryberrysbaconbible · 13/10/2025 14:38

Why isn't he advocating for himself?

Does he actually want the operation?

Secondary gain of being unwell is that he gets all.this attention. He may be afraid if his health issues resolve he will be left alone. Dysfunctional but common.

I suspect he's also on the spectrum.
He says he does want the operation, I have no reason to not believe that.
He's possibly right about being left, but if the current situation continues he WILL be finding himself alone.

OP posts:
GirlonaCloud · 13/10/2025 16:36

I don't know why you have stayed with him for so long.
He doesn't appear to have been a good father at all.
Why did you stay with him when he treated your sons like that?

He's not asking any questions about his possible surgery and this has gone on for years.

Seriously, you mentioned you have had your own issues over the years (not just health.) It may be a good idea to invest in some private counselling. You appear to come over as a 'rescuer' trying to sort out someone's life when they won't help themselves.

I'm sorry you are dealing with this, but you've set the bar very low.. Maybe because of your own lack of confidence? Being your sons' biological father isn't the be all and end all of a relationship.

Maybe talk to someone professionally about where you go with all of this. You could do with some help to up your self-worth.

BuckChuckets · 13/10/2025 16:25

RakshaUK · 13/10/2025 14:51

OK, he has some good points, likeness comes and goes...

You honestly deserve more.

Cyclebabble · 13/10/2025 15:08

I am the carer for my Dh with dementia. I can tell you in my view and that of many people I have contact with that it is exhausting, debilitating and absolutely thankless. I have for sometime now felt almost entirely invisible. I have ceased to be a person and I am only a carer. In truth I am not sure I will live to come out the other side. In my case it is not DH's fault, in your case it sounds like there is more he can do to support himself and to make sure conditions do not get worse. I would think long and hard before slipping into being a carer.

isthismylifenow · 13/10/2025 14:52

RakshaUK · 13/10/2025 14:28

Some progress has been made. I set up reminders on our Alexa system to remind him to phone the GP. And he did! I broke down on Saturday which probably had something to do with it. And they are coming to see him at some point, yet to be arranged. They are also ensuring he is referred to a dietician. But I have explained it can't stretch me any further than I am already.
The nurses do raise flags on their communication with the GP, and I have an appointment by telephone with my GP this afternoon.
The sons really aren't interested in him, he was never really interested in them, never when to Parent teacher meetings, rarely went to plays or award ceremonies and now it's come home to roost.
I dont know why hes been waiting so long for surgery, hes never been told either as far as I'm aware.
And for those who ask why am I still here. I like him, hes my boys Dad, and my friend hes not had an easy life and I really dont want to be just another person who abandoned him. I may not have taken Church vows, but we have taken the same vows to each other, and they matter. He's stood by my when others wouldn't

Well, how well he follows up this visit will be telling.