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How to gently tell partner I don't like gift

109 replies

Runnermumof2 · 11/10/2025 10:11

So I was out 10 year anniversary yesterday. We don't really celebrate things like that, but being 10 years he wanted to get something to mark it. It was very nice of him and gave me a watch last night. Problem is that he really likes collecting nice watches, i don't.
He did say it wasn't expensive "so that I will wear it" and he left the receipt inside. I was £400. To me that's still expensive and honestly, I don't actually like it. It feels old fashioned to me, I know his mum would like it, so maybe that's what he was thinking ?
He said it would be good for work, as iv just gone back from maternity leave. Second problem being that I work in a hospital, so am not allowed to wear watches and am 'bare below the elbow'
How do I let him know gently that I'd prefer to return it ? I did try to bring up the topic when he mentioned that he's spent the last of his monthly money on is in a jokey way and said 'but I would have been happy with a trip to B&M, you didn't have to buy me a watch' and he responded that it was something he really wanted to do to mark the occasion.

I'm stuck. I don't want to hurt his feelings. But also I know if I keep it, it will just gather dust in the cupboard and the money could be much better spent elsewhere.
Any help ?

OP posts:
Agapornis · 11/10/2025 10:40

He got you something that he wants, not something you want. Is he thoughtless in other ways?

RaininSummer · 11/10/2025 10:25

Go with it's lovely but I won't be able to wear or. Could we swap for earrings, pendant etc as I love the momento idea? Will placate him and hopefully get what you will wear.

Dozer · 11/10/2025 10:19

Doesn’t sound like he put much thought into it really - he’s the one who wears and likes watches, he didn’t ask what you’d like or take you to choose something.

If it was £50 that’d be one thing but £400 is a lot of money to waste

SillyQuail · 11/10/2025 10:17

I think if this was my DH I'd be honest and say tbh it's not really my style and I can't wear it at work anyway, how about we have a nice day out and go to choose something together? Then you could pick what you like, saving some money if your taste isn't that fancy, and suggest spending the remainder on a nice meal or whatever else you'd like. But only you know your DH and how he'd react. Mine would be fine with this because he knows I have more specific taste than he does so he usually checks whether I'd like something before getting it anyway, but it sounds like maybe yours might be more sensitive about it?

SezFrankly · 11/10/2025 10:16

Tell him you loved the idea and sentiment, but won’t be allowed to wear the watch everyday, so feel it’s a lot of money to sit on the side.

Could it be swapped for a nurses watch? Maybe he could find a nice vintage one you like?

ToKittyornottoKitty · 11/10/2025 10:15

You couldn’t gently suggest swapping it for a cheaper one as you won’t get to wear it often. But if he doesn’t go for it I’d keep it, wear it on date nights and just appreciate the gift that he put thought into to make a special occasion.

Dozer · 11/10/2025 10:13

Yes, I’d politely tell him you don’t actually like it or want to wear a watch, and ask him to take it back.

fourelementary · 11/10/2025 10:12

I’d go with the unable to wear it at work angle- and suggest a cheaper one you’d like for the weekend or off duty and save the rest of the money or buy something else?

TheBlueHotel · 11/10/2025 10:12

Is it something that might keep its value? Could you keep it as an investment? ETA by investment I don't mean a proper one, but keep it as a keepsake to be sold at some future time when he's forgotten about it?!