How to gently tell partner I don't like gift

Explain to your husband that while you really appreciate his thoughts on buying a gift to mark the occasion you'd much rather have a bit of jewellery, (or whatever else you'd like) as you'd get more wear out of it coz you can't wear the watch at work. Then take it back to refund it or exchange it. I'm sure your DH will understand & want you to have something you like rather than something he likes that you won't wear.

Not jealous (well ok.... maybe a bit 😂) but just shocked.
Maybe I am naive but I don't know anyone who would be able to spend £400 on a gift that hasn't been specifically asked for.
I know lots of people who could plan and save up for a gift costing that amount but as a random "I hope they like it" gift I am genuine in being shocked.

Nice (failed), obvious deflection technique when you've been called out for petty, jealous behaviour.....

Well unfortunately the husband in this case wasted 400 quid because the OP doesn't like the gift.
£400 or 40p. Makes no difference really if it's a crap gift.

Don't allow your own personal budgetary constraints to try to make others feel bad because they can, or want to, sped whatever they like on a significant gift for their partner.

This is gonna be awkward, but you need to have a conversation now otherwise you’ll have another 20 years of being bought presents you don’t like or need.

After 10 years and with the shared income, you need to be honest. To be fair, I’m really surprised the husband doesn’t know about not wearing watches while doing clinical work? However it does provide a convenient way for you to package the news.

”it’s a lovely watch but I’m not allowed to wear it at work meaning it will spend most the time in a draw and only come out for special occasions, which seems a waste. Are you able to return it perhaps? It’s a lovely idea, but maybe we could look at a necklace or something that I can wear more frequently.”

Sooner the better while he still has the receipt. If £400 is a lot of money in your household, you should probably have a conversation about the need to talk to each other before purchasing such expensive gifts. The adverts are wrong, nobody like having other people’s tastes imposed on them, especially with items you wear or use regularly. When a lot of money is spent then it is really important to check it ticks all the right boxes for the recipient. But don’t go too far the other way and be too practical. It is nice to spend money on unnecessary things sometimes especially when marking a special occasion, so if you can afford that sort of money, don’t bring practicalities (beyond work) into the conversation.

Beware some men can act like children, getting into a huff and vowing never to buy you a present again, then completely blaming you for their overreaction. It’s emotional immaturity; any suggestion of been wrong makes them feel stupid (perhaps back at school again) and rather than reflecting and learning, they do what they probably did at school which is ‘attack’ by being bolshy and blaming others. If this happens, it shows some deeper problems that would really benefit from some relationship counselling. Gift giving shouldn’t be a source of fear for both of you.

This is my view exactly. I would keep it and wear it when I could. Sometimes these things have grown on me.

After ten years I’m surprised you feel the need to be gentle… I just tell DH if I don’t like his gifts and he returns them! There’s just no point bullshitting if it’s a waste of money because you’ll never wear it. £400 is a huge amount to throw away as well, it isn’t like a £30 dress you’ll never wear. Just tell him it isn’t your style and you’d rather spend the money on a day out or something nice like that…

but that's exactly what people are saying, there was no though - OP doesn't care about watches, OP doesn't wear watches, what thought process would lead a reasonable person to 'Oh I know, I'll buy her a watch!' conclusion?
I might really like high heel Louboutins and think they would be a fabulous present for me, but I wouldn't buy DH a pair..

If it were me, I would think his feelings were worth more than the cost of the watch. Be grateful he loves you enough to want to give you a 'special' gift. You can just wear it occasionally, it won't kill you, and he'll be happy. It really is 'the thought that counts' sometimes

I would accept. It with grace . My x never bought me anything nice or expensive , you are lucky

raise the bar a bit. Just because you got no presents does not mean you should be happy to get any present.

Yes!

This is one of the reasons why I don't think it's sensible for adults to buy each other surprise presents. You're now stuck with something that you don't need, don't like and will never use. And he has wasted £400.

And that's fine for you, but that's an opinion, not a fact and for the OP she feels indifferent to watches, as do many. One would hope her husband of ten years would know that.

I don't think I've ever noticed what watch someone wears.
I wouldn't have a clue what a Tag Heuer watch specifically looks like.
The point is the OP isn't interested in watches. Her husband is. Not her.
(I was fascinated by the little calculator watch a boy in my class at primary school had circa 1985. It was quite cool because you could make it play little tunes and spell out rude words "80085")

Expensive watches are an investment and a signature piece. A good watch makes the wearer look classy IMO. I wear a Tag Heuer which people notice and compliment me on frequently.

I would accept. It with grace . My x never bought me anything nice or expensive , you are lucky . If you say you don't like it it may be the last present you get .😚

Just tell him it’s what HE likes and not what you like!! He is the lover of watches not you and you would prefer a nice ring/necklace/whatever!! Surely after 10 years you can tell him that?!?! But also after 10 years he should know you don’t like watches the way you do?

It's the lack of thought that would upset me. The price to me is astronomical as well, but if that's normal for your relationship then fair enough.

He's clearly bought it because he likes watches. No consideration as to if you would like or be able to wear it.

Remember if your partners feelings are hurt because they have been thoughtless, then that's their problem.

Prepare for a big sulk though.

Problem is that he really likes collecting nice watches, i don't.

Tissot watches are nice - I've got one - but I wouldn't put a £400 Tissot watch in the 'collectors' watch' bracket. I say this because I think he was genuinely trying to please you rather than buying something that was essentially for himself.

I think you just have to talk to him and exchange it for something you'll use. You could get other jewellery for £400, a necklace or earrings if you can't wear anything below your elbows.

You might say that you love the fact he gave you a present but you can’t wear the watch at work and you’d like to exchange it for something you can wear every day, maybe some tiny diamond stud earrings., so can you choose it together?

I’d have said something straight away.

My husband bought me a bracelet last year from Pandora, a Diamonte one. If you like that kind of thing it’s nice but I do not. Too sparkly and shiny. If it had been a £20 bracelet I would have said thank you and wore it every now and then. But it wasn’t. I did say I really appreciated the effort he put into thinking of something but I I didn’t like it. I returned it.

I actually felt 2 ways about it. I did genuinely appreciate the effort but I also can’t understand why after 20 years he doesn’t know that I wouldn’t like that type of thing.

Definitely don't ask for a different/cheaper watch if you don't care about watches and don't wear one. Ask for something that actually brings you joy.

It does sound like he has bought something he likes and is interested in rather than considering a thing that you would like and be interested in .

It's a bit annoying but not sure how you address it without him going in a huff .

£400 is a MASSIVE amount of money.
Anniversary or no anniversary.