To leave DH and kids to do this

Lots of people work away from home and are home weekends, normally it's the male. I'd go for it. You will be in the same country and could travel back in the case of extreme urgency. Why put your dreams on hold or dismiss them? Go for it and your children will have a great role model for their dreams as well.

Depends on the balance at home.
My husband has worked away for years and it suits us, worth saying though that he changed jobs as the two days downtime was hell and not sustainable. He got in my way as we got into a routine without him and it could have been the end of our marriage if it’d continued. He wanted those two days as downtime but the kids wanted to see him and he was out of habit of being around children so would be easily overwhelmed.

Absolutely go for it. You deserve to do something for you and if you dont, you will likely regret it. Your kids are of an age where your eldest is more interested in friends than hanging with parents and your youngest isn't far behind them. They will barely even notice you are gone (in a nice way). Now is a great time to put yourself first and do something for you. Also, plenty of parents work away during the week and come home at weekends, it's quite fairly normal and common. Plenty also are split and don't see their kids everyday. Go for it and enjoy every second!

Just to add, when your kids are adults, they will likely be happy you done something for yourself that was of benefit to you & to them.

My dad worked away and it was fine.

Both my husband and I have worked away for long chunks of time due to the nature of our jobs, and they don't seem particularly disturbed by it. They have phones and can video call.

It's depressing to see how many people still consider parenting as basically the mother's responsibility

Men work away during the week and no one cares. Lots of kids are in boarding school during the weekdays and don’t see their parents.

And where does the dad fit?

Meanwhile she will be 6 years older, which - while it shouldn’t be - the reality is, it is harder for women than men in a lot of industries as they get older… it’s fine if you work your way up but I’d say with starting something new, do it sooner rather than later!

Yes, I grew up as a child in the RAF. When I was ten, my Dad was posted to a small island in the Indian Ocean for nine months, with a short visit home in the middle. My Mum was left at home with three kids, picked up driving again after not having done so for ten years, and we all got on with it. It wasn't absolutely ideal, but both my mother and I as the eldest child grew immeasurably in terms of independence, self sufficiency and resilience which stood us well in life. It was fine.

If your DH was desperate for kids, why did you have to give up on your dream career??

I agree that it’s your time now OP and time for your DH to bloody step up. You will still see your kids at weekends and it’s good for them to see their mum have ambition. And see their dad taking on more of the caring role for a bit.

What does your DH think? Does he think your proposal is a good idea and that you will all cope, as you did when he was away? Is he telling you there's no need to feel guilty?

For this to work you need him onside fully willing and able to step up and step in while you're away or busy, and if he's not then it's going to be a lot harder for all of you. Especially you.

I say go for it. The majority of men would not question doing this in order to progress their careers, and would have the support of their family and friends, but women are conditioned to feel guilty for doing the same.

This will not only enrich your life and make you happier, which will have a positive impact on your children, but will have a positive financial outcome for you all. Go for it.

I think you have to do it.
Your unhappiness will harm the family.
Your husband was desperate for children but still worked away.
You deserve this, its only two years and 28 weeks will fly.
Do it.

You could do it in 6 years time with far, far less impact on the children.

Maybe not in the immediate term but depending on what values they're being raised with, there's no reason they won't see the importance of their mother being educated and having a strong career and sense of self.

@dottiedodah I too have a Masters, which I did in one year, so I understand what you're saying, but the OP will be doing it over two, which I imagine will be less intense?

Funny how this shit is never said to men isn't it?

It's a shame he's not being more supportive but that's always the way it goes isn't it. It compounds the guilt that will eat you alive.

I think a lot will obviously depend on the relationship you have with your children. My daughter would cope a lot better with her dad being away than she would if I was away, even despite her having probably the strongest, healthiest father-daughter relationship I've ever seen modelled in my life. I'm the go-to comfort zone and at 10 that is huge. You'd really need to think about how you would continue to be there for your children and maintain the relationship. I know you would be here in the holidays and the weekends etc but the day to day will be a big miss for them.

But if you possibly can, it sounds like a really good opportunity and you should do it.

I'm an army brat from the days when they spent 6 months being shot at. Thanks

I've been on both sides of this.

If you don't try it you'll never know and the family don't learn a) resilience and b) that mum is allowed to live her best life too

TBH I think it would be very difficult for you really.Masters is difficult and requires a lot of work .DS did it in a year and it was full on! (in his 20s and no kids or wife!) When youre a Mum things change .

Do it. You won't be away for months at a time, you'll be home every weekend. My business partner's wife works away in the week and comes home at weekends and it works very well for them. You'd be home mid-week way more than she is, she's had the working pattern since her children were younger than yours - they're happy, well-adjusted, successful kids, and I wouldn't say my business partner is the 'default' parent as a result. Their son is much closer to his mum.

I do sometimes think my business partner is a hero though, because our work is extremely demanding and involves very long hours, and while he works from home to be physically present, he is juggling a LOT making sure his kids get to enjoy clubs and hobbies, they have a dog, a horse and goats... Don't get goats, yeah?

I'd do it.
You've put everyone else's needs first for a long time, time to do the same for yourself.
Your husband has 'made clear' he's staying put. So basically he's said this suits me and fuck what you want because my wants are more important.
Yeah, definitely time to start putting plans in place that suit you OP.

That’s an outdated and frankly harmful way of looking at motherhood. The day you get pregnant isn’t the day you stop being a person with ambitions, goals, and the right to a fulfilling life.

Children don’t just learn from what we say; they learn from what they see. Watching a mum work hard, pursue her goals, and create stability for her family teaches resilience, independence, and self-worth.

Plenty of fathers work long hours, travel for work, or are away for weeks at a time, yet no one calls them uninterested in their kids. Funny how the standard shifts when it’s a woman doing the same.

Following your dreams isn’t abandoning your children. It’s showing them what’s possible.

Yes, and they can get all of those things if one parent is away part of the week.

I would say you should do it as in the long term it will pay off this is an investment in yourself. Your children will reap the benefits in the longer term. They will probably adjust and I do hope your husband is supportive. Good luck.