What do you really think of second hand for kids?

Londoneach1 there is plenty for that age on Vinted.

When DC1 was little, she had a mixture of second hand purchases, hand-me-downs from friends and new items bought a year ahead in end of season sales, with the proportions split fairly evenly. DC2 had very little new to her as she got all her sister's outgrown clothing. She would have the odd T-shirt etc that was bought specifically for her as it had a favourite character on it. It just didn't make sense to buy everything new when there is so much already floating around the system in great condition and a fraction of the price/free. The bits I bought new in the sales were better (harder wearing) quality brands than I could otherwise justify spending on, but the sale reductions brought them in line with supermarket prices and they often made it through both DCs then either passed on or sold.
Toys and books were often second hand too, and although toys are now being quickly outgrown, books are still mostly second hand (they get through too many to buy them new!).

They are now 9 & 11yo and are very comfortable with receiving second hand items.
The 11yo's wardrobe is now over 50% friend's hand-me-downs, with the rest split between new and Vinted. When she wants/needs a particular item, she now will find a few on Vinted and send me the links, then we'll go through them to find the best of the bunch. She likes the environmental aspect to this, but also understands it means we can use the money saved for other things or, when it is something completely non-essential that we wouldn't get her outside of a birthday/Xmas, she can afford if with her pocket money. It has become harder to buy new in end of season sales and put it away for the following year now unless it's basics, but she gets less brand new these days so it isn't a problem to buy the few new items at full price as needed.
DC2 has a similar proportion of new:second hand as her sister, but I still do the Vinted legwork for her. She has different tastes and body shape to her sister, so will get a few items brand new to reflect that.

A good number of friends do similar and I always have a few very happy recipients of our outgrown clothes, so I don't think it's terribly unusual to dress DCs in second hand, but maybe it's just a case of 'birds of a feather'?

@MissScarletInTheBallroom my toddler is a muck magnet. Since they could walk, nothing has been fit for reselling, however carefully I strain remove. I've reconciled myself that old clothes will go to friends as nursery spares!

All the middle class parents I know love second hand clothes. Better for the environment to reduce waste. It's nice to have them in new clothes some of the time, but my toddler grows so fast and ruins clothes so regularly, I have to keep new things for weekends when I can keep an eye on imminent messiness!

When we had kids we went to all the mother and toddler groups. Was fantasic... everyone passed on useable clothes, some items of clothing went through 5 or 6 families.

I remember a pair of printed orange dungarees and a snowsuit that were still going strong when we left.

My girls loved it when a mum came round for a playdate with a binbag. Especially if they had older girls.

Don't know if the giveaway chains still exist now with vinted etc.

It just depends on your personality really.

My DC were dressed exclusively in hand me downs until they were about 5, and I was still getting hand me downs until recently - DC are 9 and 13. Most of my family handed them down & it was normal.

My SIL (DH's DSIS) everything has to be new, and designer. Her DS is 12 and nothing has changed. All her clothes are designer & hideously expensive. She considers her childhood traumatising because she didn't have designer gear.

But she also stays in 5 star accommodation while we choose older, cheaper accommodation. She works relentlessly to pay for it & her DH is the same. We prefer a more relaxed lifestyle & more free time.

I only hate how she turns he nose up at our lives.

I buy all of my toddlers clothes for nursery from vinted. I buy bundles of leggings, t shirts and jumpers whenever she sizes up. She comes home covered in all sorts from mud to paint to PVA Glue. I then wash them, throw out any that are beyond repair and donate them to charity shops when she sizes up. She has brand new socks, knickers, shoes and outfits from me for going out and at the weekends.

I have a friend who recoiled at me when I told her this, i just let it go over my head. It really doesn't matter, clean dressed and fed kids are the important thing.

Mumsnet seems to me to have a skewed demographic of people whose friends and family comment and criticize their choices and actions and then feel they need validation from the internet

Unless I'm missing that it's some kind of device to stir up debate why does it matter if they make a different choice? You do you as the saying goes

I think it's really good to get the kids involved in this early as well. My son really wanted some beast quest books and I showed him how many he could get on marketplace for the same cost as getting 1 in the shops... he understands how to get his pocket money to stretch further.

Of course sometimes it's worth a splurge or there's a specific things you want and it's good to also support local businesses and such... but for so many things it's really worth thinking twice.

Charity shops are far better imo when you can see exactly what you are getting. Don't have to pay for postage either or deal with dodgy Vinted sellers/rubbish delivery companies. But I guess I'm lucky with some great quality charity shops in my local high street.

Yes me too. I have a huge number of second hand items in my wardrobe and always look on Vinted when I want something new rather than in the shops first. My kids are older teenagers now but also massive Vinted fans and when they were little some of their favourite things were either handmedowns from friends with older children, or charity shop bargains. My DD was about 6 when I bought her the most goergeous purple party dress which was originally Monsoon and must have cost a packet new, she wore it loads and cried when she grew out of it.

We are however not struggling for money and this is a choice. I am concerned about fast fashion and the impact on the planet. I do know other people who think like your friend - my SIL for example. She works in a stable but not terrible well paid job and although they are not struggling, they don't have loads of excess cash sloshing around. She is very concerned about not appearing "poor". She won't even take old clothes into the charity shop in case someone sees her. Her daughter in her 20s won't shop in the sales in case someone thinks she can't afford full price. She wears as many visible logos as she can to signal where she's shopping.

According to this link https://www.wrap.ngo/resources/report/textiles-market-situation-report-2024 we each throw away 35 items of clothing each year. Into landfill. OUTRAGEOUS.

Apart from underwear and socks, I buy almost everything for the DCs second hand. I only ever buy decent things for them and no one would ever know unless I told them. I also buy second hand for myself.

All my children's clothes come from Vinted. I buy mainly high end brands, almost new, and it costs me less than if I bought everything new from H&M.

They always look fabulous.

I have also started selling their old clothes on Vinted. Sometimes I manage to re-sell things I bought on Vinted in the first place, for pretty much the same price I paid for them.

I read this as second hand kids and it really make me chuckle! Needed that this morning

I got 95% of my daughter’s clothes second hand (now 2.5years) ….and was frequently commented on how lonely she looks and what nice clothes she has!

my second daughter is now wearing them all.

second hand and looking nice are not mutually exclusive. It’s your friend that should feel embarrassed for having that view. You keep doing
you!

We are very financially comfortable, 6 figure household with low outgoings, but I buy loads off Vinted. Anything branded for the kids I often get off there, DH buys loads of him clothes on there, we have to go to formal events a few times a year and I will always pick up my dresses on there. My youngest’s wardrobe is almost exclusively second or third hand having everything passed down (he’s in high school now but doesn’t seem to bother him yet).

We might be well off but I still like to spend wisely and carefully. They like brands but it just feels really wasteful to spend £50+ on something I can buy for a fraction of that and 9 times out of 10 it still looks new, kids grow fast!

I don’t have the energy to sell though, most things get donated.

Ds is 12 im still buying second hand coats for him tbh im wearing a second hand one myself today

Save your money while you can the older they get the less opportunity to buy second hand is

What everyone mum I know does. My dd is now at the age where I'm struggling to find second hand clothes...she's 9. Most of dd clothes and pretty much all of her toys are second hand...better for the environment and you get more for your money. Huge win win

Second hand is much more environmentally friendly.

babies and toddlers grow out of clothes so quick that second hand is often like new.

new is a waste of money in my opinion.

My two have always worn 2nd hand. I remember shopping at NCT nearly new sales when pregnant with my first 18 years ago, before Vinted existed. That 18 year old now loves a charity shop bargain, vintage kilo sales and Vinted/Depop shopping as it allows him to create his own style.

It's good for the environment and good for your bank balance - What's not to like!

I think what you're doing is great. I had a ton of second hand stuff given to me for DD including clothes, a cot bed and tons of toys and I was thrilled. I can't really be bothered to actively look for second hand but I'll happily take it if someone offers.

I buy very nearly all our clothes from Vinted or charity shops. I get my shoes from Vinted, child's I buy new.
No point at all that I can see, in buying things brand new for a child who grows like a weed. She's outgrown two sizes this year.

I buy the vast majority of mine and my children’s clothes on vinted. If I want something specific I get it from a shop and I’m a bit fussy about shoes but otherwise I’m always up for a bargain and the environmental cost of endless consumerism is devastating. Most of their toys and books were charity shop or similar as well. And most of our furniture too actually.

there is more stuff in existence than we could ever use so we should all look for opportunities for recycling where we can.

ds has a cousin 11 months older than him. Most of his wardrobe was “hand me downs” when he was younger.

I didn’t actually buy him a blazer at all through high school. For his year 11 jumper I went to the local uniform exchange.

it’s not just about saving money but it’s better for the environment too. If clothes still have use left then pass then on for someone else to use!

I've never been fussed about expensive clothes - except for when I was made redundant and knew I absolutely couldn't afford to buy them at all. Then I wanted them.
I think when you've had to buy 2nd hand, not because it's ethically better or you want to save money for other things, then it becomes a matter of pride that your child's clothes are new.
It's a love language.
I've gone back to shopping in charity shops because you get some right bargains, not cos I have to but I do understand those that don't.

I used second hand clothes for the vast majority of clothing until about age 8, when the circulating of bin liners full of kids clothes seemed to dry up!

I passed the clothes on again after we’d finished with them, obviously minus items that had perished and plus new items I’d bought. It is fairly normal here to find a family with a slightly smaller child than yours and introduce yourself to offer a bag of clothes (smallish friendly village!).