To ask DH to wash his hands?

I am totally with you. I would also be asking him to ditch whatever clothes he had on into a (toxic waste) laundry bin and shower and change.

I am like this anyway and we don’t even have anyone who is immunosuppressed.

Backing you all the way on this one. Even if it just makes you feel better to have him wash his hands that’s surely the point - but also we know how germs spread and he knows very well too - he’s a doctor.

♥️

Whatever you opinion is on hand washing on entering the house the bit about 'hitting the roof' and lecturing you that he knows more than you about it, would piss me off. If it makes you happy then the 25 seconds to do it is no big deal, whatever he thinks about the merits of doing it, why not just do it. Why do people have to be so confrontational with their partners. This isn't about him being controlled or OP being a controlling partner, it's something that concerns her that he can resolve with minimal effort and time input. Then everything is good for the evening. Why come home from a stressful work situation and cause more stress at home and with the person you love because 'you know more about it'.

You wash hands before preparing food. He stuck his hands straight into food prep. So he is very unreasonable.

That said, if he'd washed his hands when leaving work, and then driven home, then it was probably OK not to wash them immediately. However, if used bus/tube etc, then hands definitely need washing upon arrival.

I'm in healthcare and wash my hands immediately I get in, and insist that DW and kids do too. I know for a fact they ignore me when they think I'm not in. But IANBU and neither are you

I’m not an especially OTT person when it comes to handwashing, but I generally wash hands when coming home after being out at work all day. I think for me it’s a bit of a hangover from covid, and working in quite a high risk workplace. I would say that a hospital is even higher risk in terms of catching illnesses etc (my DS and DBIL are both hospital workers and I’d say the frequency of sickness of various types in their household is well above what I see for other families. With that in mind I’d say it was basic common sense for someone coming in from a hospital would change and wash hands when they come home, certainly before helping themselves to communal food items. In the case of the OP, this simple act could help her manage her anxiety about germs and sickness too, so I don’t see what the issue is with her husband just washing his hands when he gets in?

My family and friends all do it anyway so don’t need to be asked.

He works in a hospital. Yes, he should wash his hands when he gets home, and especially before touching food!

And it took no time at all for an overweight person to take offence at the fact that excess weight can impact your health.

plus that wasn’t the point of my post, seems you’re looking to be offended. It was just an illustration.

I think YABU. I don't wash my hands when I get in. I'm rarely ill and when I am it's colds which are airborne. I haven't had a stomach bug for over 10 years.

What do you do about house guests who come into your house having been on the tube or wherever and don't go "to freshen up" straight away? I was cringing recently when my son and his girlfriend came in from the airport recently after a holiday. I think my son washed his hands as the habit was drummed into him from school age, but his girlfriend didn't. They were touching cupboards, the bread, taps, all sorts. The first thing I do when arriving at a destination after travelling is wash my hands. It does make a difference. If I'm out all day on a city break it's not always possible to wash your hands before eating etc and those are the times I end up sick.

It goook a while, but obviously someone managed to turn a thread about hand washing onto illness being being a fat issue

FFS HAVE A DAY OFF

I don’t think I used routinely to wash my hands before preparing food until I did my level 2 Food and Hygiene certification. Now I always do. I also wash my hands before I eat, but in most schools it’s just not practical and that’s where children may learn hygiene practices they don’t follow at home.

Several years ago, pre-Covid, I was helping backstage with an amateur production when one of the cast came into the dressing room and started washing his hands. I don’t think he’d just been to the loo, as there are sinks in there, but he may just have touched something grubby offstage. I wasn’t particularly paying attention to him until I realised how long he was taking and noticed how thoroughly he was washing every surface of his hands. When I asked him what his job was he said he was a doctor. It must have been second nature and trained into him, so that he did it even when not at work.

Perhaps it’s a generational thing. He was probably late 20s.

Exactly her point hence saying YANBU,

I've had natural ling nails for years

i wash my hands. That includes my nails. Everyone has the part if a nail most likely to be dirty/trap dirt, the bit near your finger skin.

i have never once scratched or otherwise hurt a baby/child/cared for person with my nails.

I imagine it's much more likely with false nails as people might not be so used to them.

You're incredibly unlikely to ever have good prepared by me, but don't be so judgemental. I'd rather have my food prepared by someone with long nails that washes their hands than half this thread of soap dodgers.

I totally agree with you. I only realised what a difference it made once my kids started school. I was sick of us all getting sick so often. So insisted on us all washing hands when we got in from the school run, and also anywhere else we'd been. Made such a difference.

DH has always been half-hearted about it. Pain in the arse. His argument that he washes his hands before he leaves work and he's in his own car and not on public transport. But he's touching all sorts of door handles and lift buttons after that. I think a lot of men are just naturally grubby creatures.

I work in a school and always try to wash my hands before I eat my lunch. If I don't I am much more likely to catch the latest thing going round.

It wouldn’t occur to me to wash my hands when I arrive home.

The issue is yours, OP. You should be addressing it.

Oh wow I had to check the username as I wondered if I had posted this in a sleep deprived state…

I’m an emetophobe and husband is a hospital doctor (I was a hospital doctor too but now at home with our autistic son!).

My husband was not the type to wash his hands coming home from work. He is the type to walk into a staff room and scoff whatever food is in there without thinking of washing his hands, he would chew on his pen whilst writing in notes etc (yes yes this is unhygienic I agree). Anyway, I’ve successfully hassled him enough over our marriage to wash his hands WHENEVER he comes home - whether he’s been at work or Aldi or whatever. I just think that’s common sense. It’s now a habit for him. I can hear that he’s doing it when he comes home late at night even when he thinks I’m asleep.

basically YANBU. It’s common sense, he’s at bigger risk of bringing home germs, if your family gets unwell it’s more inconvenient due to your emetophobia and your disabled child, and it’s also inconvenient to his workplace if he gets unwell - leaving his colleagues and patients in the lurch.

What?
It's basic hygiene

Genuine question. Do you ask visitors to wash their hands?

I did when it seemed acceptable when Covid was at the forefront of everyones mind, but now I'd feel very uncomfortable asking.

The amount of emetophobics on MN is crazy. That being said he should just wash his hands when he comes home, it's not exactly a massive inconvenience.

Well, unless he floats home touching nothing, whatever he's touched on the journey home....

plus, so what, 2-3 minutes washing & drying his hands properly isn't exactly a hardship.

if he lived here, he'd be going straight into the shower & putting home clothes on & the work clothes in the washing machine.

Did you sleep right the way through ALL of the Covid advice?? FFS even Boris got it!

@SENSummer

I don't think its unreasonable to ask him to wash his hands when he gets home & especially before touching food.

However, if he's washing his hands (as you said he was) before he leaves work (& he washes them thoroughly) where he works is really completely irrelevant.

I have to admit that I became somewhat complacent while the Covid rate was low, but due to it shooting up recently I've become more diligent again. (& yes. I'm aware other bugs/virus are available )

this is a poor argument. Firstly, patients might “acquire” illnesses that hospitals can’t avoid such as airborne viral illnesses spreading given the higher amount of ill people in close proximity including visitors, & healthcare being free/mandatory to access. People who are visiting an unwell relative in hospital aren’t going to stay home if they have a cold for example. But that has nothing to do with whether people wash their hands or not.

conversely, a doctor at a hospital is more likely to see “valid” illnesses caused by underlying conditions, injury, relevant medical history etc as opposed to conditions caused by not washing hands in particular. They likely aren’t going to see many people whose illness can be attributed to that, so I understand OP’s husband’s general point.

Plus there’s a range of factors that make someone more susceptible to getting illnesses, an unwell obese person is going to be more likely to be unwell due to their excess weight than not washing hands for example.

Except he will be touching things as he leaves the hospital, i.e. door handles, lift buttons, etc., so he'll still be picking up the germs of all the ill and unhealthy people in the hospital!

I'm 60, wash my hands after using the loo, before prepping food and obviously in the shower. Other than that wouldn't think of it. I'm perfectly healthy, take no medication, have never had any D&V bugs. I've also brought up a disabled child into adulthood. Maybe your lifestyle is impacting on the illnesses in your household?