To ask if most straight men are attracted much younger women?

I know what you mean, re the comparison with women who flock around men with status and wealth.

But I think it's a bit different, as it sounds like most men (regardless of whether they are in a loving relationship) are still drawn to looking at/ fantasising about attractive women, maybe every day until the day they die! This is why women can feel insecure and/ or repulsed by it.

I can't speak for all women, but I am pretty sure that most of us don't glance at men in the street who seem to be wealthy/ high status and immediately start fantasising over him. I know there are some women who would only want a man for money, but honestly I don't think it's the majority. I don't think most of us would ever really think about it.

When I am in a relationship with a man I love I don't even think about other men, regardless of how much money or status the other men have! That's the difference.

No doubt. But, around we go again. This instinct is wholesome, whereas the implication is that the male one regarding younger mates is a depravity; it’s no longer appropriate in today’s society, so men should turn it off now. Unfortunately, they can’t, just as a bee can’t stop its reward system lighting up when it sees a flower.

THANK YOU for saying this so clearly.
Classifying sixteen year olds who may have gone through puberty several years ago and may have had enjoyef sexual relationships already as ‘kids’ , and the men who fancy them as ‘perverts’ , is completely unrealistic . Fancying 8 year old kids is a perversion. Blurring the distinction helps nobody.

My husband is younger than me and I’m in my forties so I hope this isn’t the case!

Maybe it's 'natural' to also feel repulsed by it as a woman. We can't help our 'primal instincts' to want to protect our daughters.

Where in the original joke did it insinuate that the neighbours daughter was a teenager?

I don't think you can.

i am increasingly repulsed by men's sexual urges. The older I get the more men disgust me. And no, the vast majority of women do not act the same way. No, young women are not simply attracted to rich men who are older. I always hoped that men were not all helplessly dribbling over young females but the news tells me each day that they are and being rich just makes them feel more entitled to accessing young females. Women are speaking out now and increasingly men are shown in a poor light.

Our primal instincts are still instincts. We are powerfully driven to eat lots of calorific food whenever it’s available, to avoid danger lurking in the bushes and, for men, to father multiple babies, which means finding the youngest, most fertile mate they can. So, the urge itself is natural and uncontrollable, yet most posters are disgusted that men even have it, as if they have a choice in the matter. They can choose who they actually have sex and/or enter into a relationship with. They cannot choose which girls/women trigger the most powerful response in the rewards system in their brains.

Human brains are such that we don't act on primal instincts alone surely, otherwise no women would be in education as they would get pregnant very early in their life by random men. As we think there can also be an emotional connection, however minimal, to those we sleep with, that is likely to be with someone your own age.

Quite. Which is why viagra is such a commonly prescribed drug. Sperm quality declines with age and although men can father children for longer than women can become pregnant, I read that it can take a 50 year old man years to get a much younger woman pregnant.

Many middle aged men struggle to have sex without medical intervention and the quality of their sperm declines significantly, so any biological programming is the brain playing tricks on their bodies. If we are falling back on our natural state, then 50 something men would for the most part be dead, and those who were around wouldn't have a hope in the competition for a mate with young strong virile males.

Thing is, we can all agree that people look best in their 20s. And that models are more attractive than average people. That’s just a fact.

What this thread is about, though is this culture of men who can’t see how delusional and foolish they are (and creepy) when they genuinely feel that it would be appropriate for them to date a woman as young as their daughter.

Let’s imagine a female comedian made the same joke about her friends gym-bunny young son? I doubt that would be laughed at by anyone.

The culture of men who think they are entitled to date women who will have to become their carers at an age where they themselves are still relatively young comes from societal conditioning and the patriarchy. Not evolution or bloody biology.

There is a great graph for this...
(not great morally, but great as a clear illustration)

https://external-preview.redd.it/RaPV5tQUC90ahZXnCpu3ghmIHpyjnBqsXGJPqCGKYq0.png?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=1a2ea26683f2e2edcd3218fcd0d1b12df9958e41

It is from data drawn from an online dating platform, and shows how our preference to ages change as we get older. (Purely physical, based on pictures, not personality)

Women, generally prefer men slightly older to them when they are young, and then slightly younger to them when they get older themselves. But the ages are always roughly similar to theirs.

Men, no matter what age prefer early 20s.

The thing is though, so what? It is like saying that men all prefer attractive models, it doesn't make a difference in real life. The majority of those 50+ guys are not going to date date a 20 year old. Of course on purely visual aesthetics they like what they see.. but if they area 'decent' guy then when they meet that 20 year old, they will see the massive gulf of maturity/age/desires/experience etc. And then realize the are far more compatible with someone closer to their own age. We don't need to delude ourselves into thinking that older men are only, or should only be attracted to older women.

I don't think most men feel that way.

Especially those with daughters, as they would feel its not appropriate, although some do date women close to their daughters age.

Where are you getting your ‘statistics’ from? Who are these ‘lots of women’? To my 20 something daughters, a man over 30 is geriatric and they would assume a man older than that, pursuing them to be predatory. Are you yourself a man?

I would say for quite a few women above 20, they find the 40 - 55 age bracket about the most attractive. That would go up if you are
I doubt that, there are plenty women above 20 who find men of similar age attractive. Not oldies 40-55.
Unless he is very fit or rich.
I mean the male 40-55 certainly like the women in their 20's.
They've no problem using a 20 year old photo and having the balls to turn up in RL with a different face and hairline.

It's hardly a "trope" if lots of women feel that way.

The fact that you don't,doesn't disprove it.

I would say for quite a few women above 20, they find the 40 - 55 age bracket about the most attractive. That would go up if you are talking about women closer to 30.

I mean, why would that be odd.

It seems to me it would be much odder if they weren't. Why would a 25 year old man think women of 23 were the best looking, and somehow that should change as they age?

The point of sexual desire is to push people to make babies. The best people to make babies with, if you are a man, is a fairly young woman who is at peak fertility and probably quite healthy overall. Somewhat older young women might make better mums, but at the same time at least theoretically, men can father multiple children with differernt women in the same time frame. So there are lots of options open for reproductive strategies.

It's not quite the same for women. They invest a lot more in a pregnancy.

So how do you rationalise this when you're in a relationship with a man!

I mean if all men do feel like that????

It's gross and totally inappropriate they made that joke. Men are biologically wired to notice young women but the decent ones avert their eyes and don't say disgusting things that make others uncomfortable.

I'm just glad I'm a lesbian.

Are you? You could just answer the question.

Are you a robot?

This, I'm afraid... 🤷‍♀️