DP’s reaction to my PT posting progress pictures

I don’t think I’d be thrilled if my partner was letting his female PT take photos of him in his underwear and posting them online. Gym gear fine, underwear, no.

I think it’s got absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with your DP. If you’re happy to do it, that’s your choice. He doesn’t own you.

Well if OP is losing weight because she wants the admiration and praise of other people then by all means plaster her photos over social media.

For me the object of losing weight is for my own health and well being. To make me feel better about myself for me. Not for the approval of other people.

What a whole load of rubbish.

She is proud of her accomplishment and there isn’t anything wrong with sharing it, claiming that makes her egoistical is nonsense and her partner behaviour is controlling and jealous.

Are there egoistical people who share they before and after pics, sure but there are many other non egoistical people who share to motivate other people and yes get encouragement from people’s reaction and if it helps the PTs business that’s great. I’m sure she saw pictures of his other clients before she hired him.

But pole class and gym are closed locations, as gislots said. Very much in context.

A public internet post is not a closed location, and exists in every single context. Including in front of your in laws. And your boss. And your children’s teacher.

Which some people are happy with, but it sounds like that’s not your usual style - so it’s not unreasonable for your partner to be surprised.

Naked is a little different to sports bra and underwear!

People are allowed to have different opinions. My values align with my husband's as he doesn't find it disrespectful at all.

I don’t think you’ve done anything wrong! You should be proud! Don’t let him piss on your parade!

Hmm. I see his POV. Gym gear would have been ok, but not a bra and pants…

He is jealous.
I bet her would rather you remained larger and unhealthy as he thinks you won't get any male attention that way.
He is an idiot. CONGRATULATIONS - your 2 stone weight loss is a massive achievement and you deserve to be proud. Display the photos if you want to. It's your journey, not his.

It’s irrelevant that her face wasn’t visible when she has been tagged.

It is her body yes and yes technically we could all just post naked photos on our social media and say “it’s my body you can’t tell me not to”, but there is a level of respect to be expected in a relationship. My husband could post a photo of him naked on Instagram if he wanted to, I can’t dictate to him, but I also wouldn’t be too interested in continuing our relationship, I wouldn’t be too happy, which is totally understandable.

I would be a bit funny if my DP posted photos of himself in just pants on social media to be honest!

Her face wasn't visible, it's only an arse, and no I wouldn't mind. I put holidays snaps up and I'm wearing bikinis in those. It's her body, no one should dictate what she does.

Is your arse out in your hairdressers photos? If not, then it’s very much not the same thing.

I wouldn’t be particularly happy with my husband posting photos in his underwear, nor would he be with me doing it- you can show progress while wearing clothes.

If I was wearing underwear in a pic online my DP wouldn’t be happy - and to be honest, I would understand it. But, you said your face isn’t visible. Are you tagged in it? If you are, It’s basically the same thing as your face being in the picture.

I don't see anything wrong with it. My hairdresser often puts before and after photos on social media, it's quite normal. I don't expect to be paid. I'd also see it as a compliment as he obviously thinks you've worked hard and it shows.

I wouldn't be impressed with your DPs behaviour. It seems very controlling to me.

Underwear? That would be a no from me. If my dh was parading on SM like this I would be very unhappy.

He doesn’t get to control what you do with your own body or who sees you in your gymwear. It’s a progress photo, not an Only Fans account. And you’ve put the effort in, you’ve done really well, you’re allowed to be proud of yourself and think you look good - have an ego about it, it’s hard work. Feeling good enough about yourself to want your PT’s customer group to see the achievement and that they’re a good PT is absolutely normal.

ETA: I’ve seen plenty of my in laws in their gymwear, I run and swim with SILs, BILs and MIL when I’m in town. Even FIL has seen me coming in from a run. None of us are appalled about Lycra and some skin.

Well done on your progress OP!

I think if you are comfortable with the photos then that is ALL that matters. Your body to show off as you wish, your partner gets no say in my opinion. I bet it’s no more revealing than a bikini from what you’ve described anyway!

Do you think he feels threatened by your weight loss? It’s quite common sadly for partners to get insecure if they feel their other half is improving themselves.

Sports bra is fine, underwear no. YABU.

Oh you were in underwear? I assumed gym gear. Im on the fence now. I admire your confidence, though.

I will play devils advocate and can see your partners point of view. I would not post these photos of my body to be scrutinised online, and I wouldn’t like it if my husband did too.

It sounds like you are in clothes that are more revealing than what you’d normally wear in front of family and friends?

I also suspect that there is an element of jealousy/ possessiveness/ embarrassment for your partner, that another man has taken these photos and now other men in particular will see your body in some state of undress.

It's unlikely his family are likely to be looking the trainer's/ gym website and even if they were presumably you were wearing regular gym kit and not looking like an advert for Only Fans.

Your DH is being a muppet.

@Hanhan2 presumably you were in normal gym gear in the photos?

I'm afraid I see weight loss as a personal thing, a personal achievement. And I would find posting photos of it on social media very egotistical and unnecessary. So I can understand your partner finding it off putting.
It would be what it said about your character that would be upsetting to me. Not the actual photos.