To wonder what people actually expect and why they can’t just be happy to live simply?

OP, you are seeing the direct result of our unquenching desire for "happiness" over our true need for "contentment". Since these to desires have been inexorably twisted, we selfishly believe we deserve far more than we do. In the West, we've become selfish, childish, and egotistical in our neverending need for more stuff, more experiences, and more entertainment. The cycle of work and the bottomless need to consume the spoils of our labour is why nearly every negative post on your thread exists.

We aren't a happy people. Hell, we aren't even content anymore. We are slaves in a grind that demands our souls and rewards us with shiny uselessness.

You are on the right track OP. You have the sense of it and shouldn't be discouraged by the direction of society. It won't listen to you. It's too busy seeing you as the enemy of it's drugs of choice, avarice and materialism.

There is more to life than just getting by.

But I do see a lot of people moaning about how skint they are, then do a breakdown of outgoings and half the list is luxury items or events. These posts are the stupid ones. By all means have the luxuries just don't bitch about how poor you are after when some people really are struggling. It's tone deaf.

Wel, not everyone thinks two spikes would be an extravagance.

What a horrible way to think about someone who, rightfully, sees the serenity and pleasure in a simpler life. You, my dear Goose, like it appears most other responders, believe material wealth and "fun" should be at the expense of the labour we provide more successful people so they can become more wealthy while we spend what meager resources we have going to far off lands to get pissed.

Well, if they expect it, they should work their hardest to get the best paying job they can
Then, they should buy a house commensurate with their wage
A car too, commensurate with wage
Then, if they do, they can afford nice stuff on top

Living simply & not consuming crap like a beast isn't communism ffs 🙄

Also everyone harking back to the days of the 70s when kids didn't get taken out - kids went out on their own and played in the park etc without adults from quite a young age - certainly by the time I was 7 I was taking my brother and I to the rec behind the house and running around with a gang of neighbours children. No parental supervison whatsoever other than calling us in for lunch. Nowadays someone would call SS.

This is the difference in mindset of Live to Work and Work to Live. It's all marketing and we're all overworked, so we can be easily manipulated to be sold anything, ways to de-stress, things to make out lives easier, contraptions and tat to make us feel more "us" but all while keeping the wheel spinning for the 1%.

And as a child of comfortably off parents in the 1970’s I can say that I was often bored to tears! shops were shut on Sundays, most entertainments were shut on Sundays, we were not a church family so there was not even that. Yes we spent time on the Downs or at the beach but I would have loved to have the life that today’s children often get. I for one can 100% see why people expect this quality of life!

What's not true exactly?

I half agree with you OP - I think the trappings of modern life can be quite limiting in a way, and as a society we have become more materialistic. I am happy driving a second hand car (rather than buying a new one on HP), not buying new clothes until I actually need them, not having the latest phones or any gadgets, however I do like to buy good quality ethically produced food and we love going on adventurous holidays as a family! I’m glad we can afford to live in a lovely property and go on amazing holidays (only through good fortune as my family is wealthy and bank roll us to some extent) but I have far ‘less’ than I did growing up as I had a very financially privileged upbringing, and that doesn’t bother me at all. I’m not materialistic and don’t want everything new and shiny or the latest things. We are bringing our children up the same, to value experiences over things - they love travelling and are lucky to have their own ponies and other animals, and to take part in lots of sports.

@mrlistersgelfbride I think this is important too - if you are in a family/couple - then very often you can have differing ideas of priorities - it doesn’t always start out that way but it’s easy for situations to change - my rather bohemian H from 1995 has turned into quite a lover of nice hotels, good cars ( even if 7 years old) , nice quality meals, goodies wine and living in high end areas etc even though he could quite easily compromise and have life far easier from the money end of things- but nope he won’t .

Hello - Earth calling!

The West is in decline. This century will (if it doesn’t already) belong to China.

There is no natural law which says our lives will continue to get better. Maybe we’ve peaked in Britain and Europe? I think historians will say that the peak years were the early 2000s, pre2008 financial crash and Covid.

Things are not going well for this country or for other European nations. Pressure from migration and economic decline are playing into the hands of right wing movements across Europe. Sorry, but this is where we are.

I think we’ll get by but I DON’T buy the “Things should be getting better all the time” line. Read your history!

Not true. And until the mid to late 80s most people in a decent job could expect to buy a property by their mid 20s. On their own

Since Thatcher’s neo con project wealth has flowed ever upwards to the Meg rich.

That’s the real issue

Yeah…they are my beans 😂😁

Maybe because life has seasons and so now you want to cost but later you want to travel?

Maybe because your partner doesn’t want to sit tight?

Maybe because your children aren’t thinking that?

Life is more than just how you think and want.

edit : cosy not cost (blimmmmmy phone!)

I do know what you mean.

I don’t need a lot of stuff and I’m happy to potter about with a book , go for runs and walks , cash in a free coffee or just stay in.
When I lived only my own (albeit it was now 15 years ago) , £100 went a long way.

I now have a partner and a DD who like stuff, expensive hobbies and big holidays.
We don’t need these things. But they do make life more fun.

Half the posters on MN these days are angry at anyone with half a can of beans to their name.

So funny because its true 😂😂😂

@Katypp - apologies! I reacted before I'd even finished reading your post, thinking it was a boomer bashing one, & it wasn't.. sorry..

Hang on, @Katypp - only just started reading this thread & your 'hate the boomers' post came up. This boomer doesn't drive, doesn't drink, never been out of the UK.. do NOT generalise.

For my partner and I, the reward of building careers and grafting hard is travelling, we don't do a lot of materialistic stuff, our passion is booking flights and Airbnbs and going exploring. I love it all, seeing stuff, eating stuff, drinking stuff and meeting lovely people. 62 countries under the belt now and I'll never look back on my life and have any regrets that I didn't do things I really enjoyed.

I don't know where you get your money from, but a majority of us work for our money and expect to get more from it than working just to pay bills and eat.

For me there’s so many free great days out, but you still have to find £40 for fuel to get there and back. I can walk for miles from my home and swim in a river if I want to, but if you don’t have that on your doorstep, there’s massive pressure to take your kids to special things. I do feel a bit for kids spending half their days in backs of cars going here there and everywhere while parents get frazzled & burnt out. I used to take my son camping, beaching and walking, reserving shopping, ice skating and cinema to times when there was more money.

This. I live in a crappy area too. Makes things feel so much harder.

This is also depressingly true