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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be late for school once a week?

259 replies

Latelateshowz · 07/10/2025 11:30

(Writing this from DC POV.)

I am in year 13 at school. My school’s late policy is that you can be late once a week without any penalty. If you get two lates you get put on a report and have to turn up early for 2 weeks.

I don’t see the point of getting in on time just to sit around in form time or to go to an assembly. So I choose to make the most of the system that is in place and deliberately go in late once a week.

In case it is relevant, I have the second highest voluntary service hours in the school (this is for things like helping younger students, doing clubs etc) and I am predicted the highest grades. I’ve never had any detentions for behaviour etc.

My form tutor mentioned my punctuality in a recent parents meeting and my parents think I should just be on time. My view is that I am just making the most of the system the school has set up.

YABU: get yourself to school on time
YANBU: fair enough, be late if you want

OP posts:
comoatoupeira · 07/10/2025 11:39

But if it's deliberate and regular, then there is self-discipline. They do know how to be punctual. So there isn't a problem skills-wise.

Possibly a respect problem, though. Inability to put themselves in the school and teacher's shoes? Classic teenage mental pathways.

NorthSouthEast · 07/10/2025 11:38

Ach, I couldn’t be worked up about this. Yr 13 is a bind of revision and exams and doing routine stuff in school when you’re itching to grow up and start your life. If school don’t penalise for one late per week, that’s the policy. There can be a lot of sitting around doing nothing in those admin spaces. But of course if you use up the 1 time a week goodwill offer and then you are late another day, you’ve used up your safety net and can’t moan or complain about the consequences.

Shmee1988 · 07/10/2025 11:38

Technically your dd is following the rules. However, in preparation for further life activities such as work, this may not be the best habit to get into. Not many employers will adopt a '4 lateness occasions in a month is okay' policy. Also, will Universities look at punctuality and time keeping skills? Maybe worth consideration.

LadyQuackBeth · 07/10/2025 11:37

This slight flexibility in policy is not for you, it isn't a "benefit," to go in late that you are missing out on, it's to allow them to focus on the people with real problems getting to school on time.

You are a distraction and likely to ruin this policy for everyone, take a bow!

Ooogle · 07/10/2025 11:37

If the school are bothered by it they should change their policy. It’s between him and the school at his age

NovemberMorn · 07/10/2025 11:37

Get into school on time.
It's called self discipline. Something that'll come in handy once you get out into the real world.

comoatoupeira · 07/10/2025 11:36

For me it depends on what he's doing with the extra time. If he's going for a nice long walk, doing a work out, or spending time with his gf/bf, then that's great. Or having more sleep.

If it's gaming or phone time or anything else, I would push back on it.

Noshadowsinthedark · 07/10/2025 11:34

Really weird post OP.

Mumsnet shouldn’t do your parenting for you. Support your child to get to school on time.

Your child isn’t exempt from the rules and you shouldn’t be encouraging this. I would imagine they can still take punitive measures or amend the policy if people choose to ‘make the most’ of it, which would be a shame for those not deliberately getting in late.

KarmenPQZ · 07/10/2025 11:34

I had an uncle like this. His employer had 6 weeks sick leave on full pay in his contract. So every year he took it as part of his benefits package. It’s not really what it’s meant for and says a lot about your personality in my opinion.