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Original poster

Help! Too embarrassed to go to GP?

145 replies

Derry30 · 07/10/2025 05:00

Really stupid I know but just looking for a bit of advice

I’ve got a really bad cough as a result of a recent flu. I’m otherwise recovered but cannot shift the cough, and it’s to the point I’m coughing so hard at night I’ve vomited a few times (not because I’m sick, but just because of how hard I’m coughing) and the coughing is keeping me awake now - if I cough hard I vomit, but if I don’t cough hard then the brown phlegm feels like it’s blocking my chest

I’m asthmatic and at my last plan they said if I get any lingering colds I should contact them for an appointment because I’ll probably need steroids.

but last time I was at the doctors surgery the nurse said ‘I’ve met you before haven’t i?’ I wasn’t actually sure so I just said probably yeah because I’ve had bad luck recently in terms of my health, and she joked ‘yeah I feel like you’ve probably met everyone in here by now you’ve had that many appointments!’ It sort of stung a bit and I’m now really, really self conscious and paranoid about going. For context- that was a few months ago and was because I had a new lump which had grown suddenly and quickly on my neck (and needed a 2 week referral so it wasn’t for nothing IYSWIM). previously to that I had several appointments over the last few years (maybe averaging 3-6 a year) for a few things but it’s all been legit (asthma, psoriasis, heart condition etc)

I know the comment wasn’t meant in a bad way but it’s really made me nervous about going back and being seen as difficult or a time waster because it’s obviously been flagged that I go a lot 😬 but at the same time I cannot take another sleepless night from coughing! How do i suck up the embarrassment and make an appointment tomorrow? Thanks

OP posts:
Nannyfannybanny · 07/10/2025 09:57

Ring the surgery! I don't think the nurse was rude or insensitive, you just have to know your audience
I have a ds with RCBPD I went with him for a blood test,he's in his 40s, nurse called his first name, she should have asked, couldn't get blood, then he asked what the blood test was for.... she didn't know!! It was a nightmare! I was nursing almost 40 years, yes,abx for you, probably a chest x ray...some pharmacies can script.

Stillgroupie · 07/10/2025 09:56

YABU

Imbusytodaysorry · 07/10/2025 09:52

@Derry30 ive not been away from the doctors surgery for months and do you know what , I don’t care. It’s my health and that’s why they are there .
Go back and if they offer that person say no I’d prefer someone else .
Then bring it up , you will feel better just say you have delayed coming in and why .
Go and get checked out .

monty2020 · 07/10/2025 09:50

You need to see a Dr soon, very, very unprofessional comment from the nurse . If you went ten times a week she had absolutely no right to make that comment and if she says something again make a complaint to the practice manager .

gamerchick · 07/10/2025 09:37

Well you can ignore the daft twat who upset you and make an appointment, or you get let it get so bad you'll have to go to A&E and sit for hours.

Make that appointment.

Christwosheds · 07/10/2025 09:35

Eenameenadeeka · 07/10/2025 05:33

I don't think her comment was meant to be rude at all, you said you've had bad luck with your health and she agreed that you'd needed to be in a lot, don't think she meant you were wasting anyone's time just that you'd needed lots of care. Get into the doctors you aren't doing any wrong and no one is thinking badly of you

This. She probably meant it in a sympathetic way, not an unkind way. Don’t worry about it or overthink it, just get an appointment and get seen. You really don’t want a cheat infection to linger.

BeaRightThere · 07/10/2025 09:33

Derry30 · 07/10/2025 05:00

Really stupid I know but just looking for a bit of advice

I’ve got a really bad cough as a result of a recent flu. I’m otherwise recovered but cannot shift the cough, and it’s to the point I’m coughing so hard at night I’ve vomited a few times (not because I’m sick, but just because of how hard I’m coughing) and the coughing is keeping me awake now - if I cough hard I vomit, but if I don’t cough hard then the brown phlegm feels like it’s blocking my chest

I’m asthmatic and at my last plan they said if I get any lingering colds I should contact them for an appointment because I’ll probably need steroids.

but last time I was at the doctors surgery the nurse said ‘I’ve met you before haven’t i?’ I wasn’t actually sure so I just said probably yeah because I’ve had bad luck recently in terms of my health, and she joked ‘yeah I feel like you’ve probably met everyone in here by now you’ve had that many appointments!’ It sort of stung a bit and I’m now really, really self conscious and paranoid about going. For context- that was a few months ago and was because I had a new lump which had grown suddenly and quickly on my neck (and needed a 2 week referral so it wasn’t for nothing IYSWIM). previously to that I had several appointments over the last few years (maybe averaging 3-6 a year) for a few things but it’s all been legit (asthma, psoriasis, heart condition etc)

I know the comment wasn’t meant in a bad way but it’s really made me nervous about going back and being seen as difficult or a time waster because it’s obviously been flagged that I go a lot 😬 but at the same time I cannot take another sleepless night from coughing! How do i suck up the embarrassment and make an appointment tomorrow? Thanks

OP frankly this is ridiculous. You clearly need to go see a doctor and you KNOW this. Forget what some random nurse you might never see again said. It was a stupid comment that means nothing. Get the help you need.

FlyingUnicornWings · 07/10/2025 09:32

Derry30 · 07/10/2025 09:01

Got an appointment for this afternoon! The lady on the phone was lovely, so relieved I called

Good luck! I hope all is ok!

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 07/10/2025 09:30

Honestly, I thought you were going to say you did a massive, noisy, smelly fart in the waiting room!

It’s really not worth agonising about a casual remark that was probably just small talk.

So do please just go - you know you need to.

Cantabulous · 07/10/2025 09:25

Ah I’m so glad you got your appointment OP. Illness and lack of sleep leave us emotionally weak so a worry such as yours builds out of all proportion. I hope you get the help and reassurance you need this afternoon x

Weightlo55 · 07/10/2025 09:18

Good news. Nurse was wrong to say that though.

MissMarplesGoddaughter · 07/10/2025 09:16

Please just go to the doctor

Do Not allow a casual remark from a nurse compromise your health.

Notagain75 · 07/10/2025 09:15

She probably can't even remember making the remark. She will.see soany people she just spoke without thinking.
Please just go to the doctor.. When I was like you I went to the pharmacist as I couldn't face going to the doctor but the pharmacist sent me straight to the doctor because she said she thought I had a chest infection the doctor saw me that night and prescribed antibiotics. Honestly after a week of the medication I felt so much better.
Chest infections left untreated can get nasty quickly.So please go now or if you have one in your town a walk in centre

LovingLimePeer · 07/10/2025 09:11

You'll need someone to exclude whooping cough, infective exacerbation of asthma and pneumonia.

Any cough lasting >3 weeks is likely to require an x-ray and long-term untreated asthma exacerbation puts you at risk of complications such as bronchiectasis.

I think this was a throwaway comment from the nurse and I wouldn't read too much into it.

Being unwell isn't embarrassing, it's part of life. We all go through phases of needing medical care more often and that's not a sign of weakness or of overusing medical services. You have nothing to feel ashamed about here.

zingally · 07/10/2025 09:10

It was likely intended as a light-hearted comment to strike up conversation. Not a personal dig at you.
It sounds like you do need an appointment. Personally, I'd take the view that your health is a lot more important than the opinion of one nurse you've met once.

godmum56 · 07/10/2025 09:09

noworklifebalance · 07/10/2025 06:43

@JamesWebbSpaceTelescope - i can understand how the comment may play on your mind but (and I am going to be harsh now) you are an adult, you know your past visits are justified, you know this visit is justified so just go and see the GP. If you see the nurse don’t be sheepish, stand tall (metaphorically or literally), look her in the eye, smile/nod and carry on,

this. I have got a friend who jokes she was on first name terms with all of the local minor injuries unit staff when her kids were small. It was intended as a friendly comment, nothing more. Just bloody go to the doc.

TimingOff · 07/10/2025 09:05

The IRONY of that comment. It used to be that your GP or district nurse WOULD know everyone patient. Do not be embarrassed OP.

HappyintheHills · 07/10/2025 09:04

Well done.
I had similar recently. Followed by a good appointment and outcome. Wishing the same for you.

Oneearringlost · 07/10/2025 09:03

Derry30 · 07/10/2025 09:01

Got an appointment for this afternoon! The lady on the phone was lovely, so relieved I called

Sorry, just seen your update. Hurrah! Hoping for a better reception and gappy outcome, this afternoon.

3luckystars · 07/10/2025 09:02

You need to go to the doctor right now.

I was in A and E so many times one year with my children, someone asked me if I worked there !!

Asthma is so serious you need to take proper care of your health. Ignore all comments ever again.

Oneearringlost · 07/10/2025 09:01

OP, the nurse shouldn't have said that, but it could have been a silly, chit/chat throwaway comment.
Coughing until you vomit can be a sign of Whooping Cough. You are asthmatic, you probably need some antibiotics/steroids. Do go to the GP. You owe it to yourself and should be looked after appropriately.
Best of luck, it sounds like you're really suffering with this, miserable. X

Original poster
Derry30 · 07/10/2025 09:01

Got an appointment for this afternoon! The lady on the phone was lovely, so relieved I called

OP posts:
lightnesspixie · 07/10/2025 08:47

Ignore them. Go get checked. I’m a nurse

LooseCanyon · 07/10/2025 08:46

Howwilliknow122 · 07/10/2025 08:07

I think they can now (not 100 per cent sure if they do for chest infections) but our local chemist does for a few types of infections like uti but if they are concerned they refer you to gp.

Show quote history

Not for coughs, they can't. And a post-viral cough won't respond to antibiotics anyway.

Glad that OP is now going to the GP.

https://www.england.nhs.uk/primary-care/pharmacy/pharmacy-services/pharmacy-first/

NHS England » Pharmacy First

NHS England » Pharmacy First

https://www.england.nhs.uk/primary-care/pharmacy/pharmacy-services/pharmacy-first

TiggyTomCat · 07/10/2025 08:45

Derry30 · 07/10/2025 05:08

Yes, a few times. The pharmacist couldn’t really recommend anything else to try

its in my asthma plan to go to the GP if I have a cough from a cold for a certain length of time, or if my peak flow is in a certain range. I know I need to go, it’s just plucking up the courage after last time! I know the comment was meant to be light hearted but it’s played on my mind ever since she said it

Show quote history

I used to be a practice nurse and I'm sure that's exactly how she meant it - lighthearted and a poor attempt at a joke! She would be mortified she made you feel like that.
Your notes won't be "flagged" that you have been in a fair bit and you absolutely won't be thought of in a negative way because you are not a time waster. The ones who are are the ones that don't turn up for appts.
Make an appt - you definitely need to be seen and I hope you feel better soon.