AIBU for thinking it was more than friends?

Ah, young lesbian drama, those were the (shit) days! Enjoy yourself, look after yourself, no need to commit to anyone.

You're in Scouts Explorers so you're 14-18? Maybe see if there is a safe support group for LGBTQ PoC young people near you. You're not the only one with homophobia family. If you're in London, look at the LGBTQ Community Centre.

A lesson from an oldie here…..
Block and move on, if you see them again be polite but no more.
Do not chase as it never ends well and makes you look desperate.
If they are madly in love with you they’ll find you, if not they won’t bother.
ps you sound very sorry for yourself - don’t be, toughen up and get annoyed (not upset) if people use you - as this person did at your party.

No. The previous poster said she didn't understand what the hell you were on about with the flip flop of he/ she /they. I merely clarified that the people concerned are lesbians and therefore same sex attracted and there is no" he" involved anywhere.

If anyone was paying attention they’d notice that OP actually started out using “they”. It’s only when other posters made the assumption and said “he” that OP started saying he. Totally understandable if you’re lacking in confidence that you’d go along with the assumption that we’re talking about a heterosexual relationship.

@FaceBothered why are you being so mean?

It’s not a kind way to treat a friend is it - they’ve led you on what ever way you look at it. I wouldn’t wait - they’ve done this to their friend and their girlfriend (you won’t know the exact time lines and whether they overlap or not)

Lesbians.

You should probably stay away completely? Don't let this girl run you around. Think more of yourself.

Edit: wrong gender

I’m truly sorry that you have grown up in a homophobic household.

However, I don’t really understand what you mean. Are you not proof reading your comments before posting? Surely you were aware you were referring to this “love interest” as both a he and a she. Stuff like that just doesn’t bide well on here. Most people genuinely want to give advice, but it’s hard to give advice to someone who comes across as disingenuous or a potential “troll”, AKA bored kid on the wind up.

Coming onto a parenting forum full of adults- using language and abbreviations that most adults don’t use is an also a massive red flag.

But if you are genuine and this is a real life situation then just block this girl. She is also immature. She isn’t your friend. She isn’t interested in you or pursuing you romantically.

Use your time to focus on proper friendships and making memories with your friends. Focus on your studies. Focus on hobbies you enjoy. Improve your self esteem and confidence before you start dating later in life.

Oh please try and harden your heart op and cut this person off.

They are not perfect at all! Or amazing or nice!

They have messed you around and been flirty and led you on when their relationship was in difficulty, and then they dropped you like a stone once it was back on track.

You have been used I’m afraid. Find your anger! And please work on your boundaries and self-esteem before entering in to another relationship. We were all desperate to feel loved and special at your age - I hope that doesn’t sound condescending - I mention it because but that sometimes makes us vulnerable to users. But as we age, we learn to separate the wheat from the chaff a little better. And we come to realise that - no excuses - if someone wants and loves you then they will absolutely put you first as a priority and fight for you. No excuses or extenuating circumstances or exes complicating things!

This person is not your friend. They did not behave with integrity. Head up and walk away. Block them on your phone and sm. You deserve much better than this. Most importantly, do not entertain the idea of them coming back to you under any circumstances.

And generally work on being a little less available op. You are valuable and people need to demonstrate their sincerity and work a little to win you over.

And please don’t go changing your hair for anyone! Style your hair to suit yourself and find someone who likes you for you!

OP, this person is messing with your feelings so they are definitely not the nicest, most perfect person you’ve ever met!

If someone is both genuine and genuinely into you, you won’t feel confused at all. Their words and actions will be crystal clear and no mind games will be played. This person is keeping you dangling, you’re an ego boost to them.

Now you have the opportunity to set your own boundaries and decide - what treatment/behaviour will you accept from others? Set your self-esteem to high, and don’t accept anything less than you deserve. Which is a hell of a lot more than this!

A similar thing happened to me when I was about 20 (half my life ago basically!) - I would advise you to forget completely about this person and their "friendship" and find other, more respectful people to hang out with. 😊 Don't debase yourself like I did!

100% this.

Not nice and perfect. They were toying with your affections. Not sure why you’d want to go back to them, to be honest.

Someone I used to work with was waiting for a lad to ask her out. And waiting. And waiting. There was always an excuse why it wasn’t the right time.