“Mumsnet rich”

My issue is not that "I'm actually rich but I'm comparing myself to flashy influencers and posh mums at the school gate".

My issue is that my actual net worth, i.e. assets in the bank, is low, and until recently was actually negative.

And that being lectured about being "wealthy" therefore is irritating, particularly by people who "only earn £40k" but have 6-figure pensions and housing equity and extremely low outgoings for the same or better lifestyle than me. My massive mortgage is for a 2-bed ex-council property like I said. My toddler and upcoming 2nd DC will share a room.

Exactly. There are a lot of people on MN who say they are 'not rich' because they spend all their money on the most expensive version of everything (large mortgage on a large house in the right village near the right schools with a bedroom for each child that is large enough for a double bed and also one or two home offices). Either both partners are in 'big jobs' so they 'need' a nanny or to spend thousands a month on nursery, or one is a SAHP.

Groceries are delivered from Ocado and basic essentials are organic protein and a punnet of blueberries per person per day.

The above is seen as a normal basic standard of living and CoL crisis means they can't do the above and still save thousands a month, so they're 'not rich'. They think a car that is 10 years old, buying their Seasalt or Boden clothing from Vinted even though it costs more than new clothes from M&S/Next and a holiday in Cornwall is a sign that they don't spend anything much on ostentatious consumer goods, seemingly oblivious that most people see a 10 year old car as nearly new and a week in Cornwall likely costs more than a week abroad.

MN rich is being able to afford the most expensive version of everything without compromise. When you have to compromise on anything that means you're 'struggling' and if, shock horror you significantly have to curtail your lifestyle to the degree that you can't live in your preferred area at all even with DC sharing bedrooms, have to do things like work opposite shifts to save on childcare, or cut back on blueberries, then you become MN poor, which would be where you have a household income under £100k, because as we all know £100k is 'not that much' and people on £20k will have more money because of all the UC they get.

I think the rise of “influencers”, celebrities and prevalence of social media has distorted our perception of what “rich” is.
I don’t blame PP’s for not feeling rich even with incredibly high incomes as all you have to do is hop online and see “rich” people showcasing their lifestyle and it doesn’t match up to theirs. Private planes, super yachts, trips to fashion week, constant holidays, the illusion (or reality) of not actually working.

I would consider myself well off. I wouldn’t consider myself rich or wealthy because the mundane middle class life I lead does not match up to the visuals of what rich looks like online.

It could even warrant a UC top
up! 🤣

To me 'Mumsnet rich' means people with over 100k+ income. Invariably they don't think it's nearly enough.

Once children leave education you no longer get UC if working full time so for some people this will be the only income, especially if single.

I know in a few years I’ll be on wage only and I’m not much over min wage but I won’t get help then.

I have no idea what it means. I'm neither mumsnet rich nor any other type of rich though, so perhaps that's why.

And this is why there are so many threads of six-figure earning households complaining about their lot, which are then met by absolute incredulity from others.

They aren’t eligible for childcare (possibly worth tens of thousands net), and will be paying tax rates of 60%+ and perhaps even a student loan - so the take home pay isn’t as good as it looks. But then the cost of living on top of this is so high - as you say a £4k mortgage, maybe £4k in childcare. Thats the entire take home pay on £150k.

And that £4k a month mortgage buys what would be an utterly unremarkable house elsewhere, so despite being more fortunate than most… it’s all just pretty ordinary.

Very true. Income and wealth are not necessarily the same thing. People above a certain age lived through periods where it was possible for people on not very high incomes to acquire property that later became extremely valuable, and needed much more money to acquire for those born later.

This is not the same as saying all people had access to those opportunities, but the number in older generations who did is much higher than those in younger generations.

MN rich is the delusion that you’re not rich despite earning £350k between you because you’re always ‘rushing around’. 🙄

A lot of these “boo hoo pity us we only earn £100k” people will also benefit later on from bank of mummy and daddy, and inherited wealth. So income is only part of the picture.

Is that 23k overall, or 23k with UC on top? I think sometimes people forget that UC is basically equivalent to another wage.

I take what I read on Mumsnet with a pinch of salt.

The average salary in London is about 55K and in the UK about 35K.

I can accept that of course some people here will have higher incomes but I can't help but think that there is a lot of boasting and ''fantasy lives'' on this forum...

Totally agree!

We live in London. Our combined income is c.£250k but our mortgage is close to £4k a month and childcare of close to £2k a month. Obviously paying a lot of tax. Have decent holidays and go out for dinners etc but definitely don't feel "rich". House needs loads of work which we have to save for. Feel grateful and privileged though.

I think a large part of it is the timing of purchasing property. Had we bought ours 10 years earlier at a significantly lower price we'd prob feel well off. Property prices and salaries haven't increased at the same rate (in London at least, can't speak for other places).

So salary / income alone isn't the sole indicator. There are lots of different factors.

Why is it dreadful?

Surely on that wage you could afford to go part time and still afford private school? You must be saving huge amounts?

I thought it was a reference to the fantasists amongst us. 😂

I’m MN poor and low class then. Single parent, living in a council flat on a crap estate in London. Only for another 2 years them I’ll be living on the coast, still MM poor but hey Ho

@ResusciAnnie the the tread seems to have been derailed from what MNs rich is

Meaning of c suite
CautiousLurker01

don’t even now that c-suite means!

I manage on £23k.

It always amazes me when people say they ‘only’ have £3k left each month after outgoings and how will they ever manage. Madness.

@Lifecanbebeautiful12 I also think that it’s not easy to view yourself as rich based on income alone, particularly for those who don’t come from money, as income is not certain.

Yes exactly.

It's obviously better to have a higher income than a low one, all else equal, but there are a lot of steps (and things that could go wrong) between that and money in the bank.

When you earn more than your parents you can't rely on them to bail you out if you can't pay the mortgage one day. It feels a bit like flying too close to the sun.

I agree, if I heard the phrase ‘Mumsnet Rich’ I would take that to mean ‘Rich and clueless’. So many threads ‘we earn £150k but can’t afford a holiday’; ‘income of £200k but struggling’.

Not really sure what else MN Rich might mean - rich compared to other posters, or what MNers perceive as rich?

we earn a base of 120k combined (not including OT and bonus) and we save 2.5k per month. I feel very well off to be fair.

Everything is relative. I come from a small city where most people are working class or middle class but still struggling. My husband earns very well and for the town I come from we would be viewed as incredibly wealthy. But we live in London and my kids go to a private school where many of their friends live in huge, fully staffed homes and fly with private jets. Compared to them we are poor. It took me some time to stop comparing and feeling bad. I think it is human nature to not feel like we have ‘enough’. I’m sure the extremely wealthy families also feel some amount of competition with those richer than them. I also think that it’s not easy to view yourself as rich based on income alone, particularly for those who don’t come from money, as income is not certain.