To have ended it over this?

Well I am not sure what is in your mind, but it has nothing to do with my life!

I'm suddenly much more interested in your backstory than hers.

The bit I was focused on was him saying he is not on Facebook, then op seeing him on Facebook and then him reiterating that he’s not on facebook. Why lie if there’s nothing to hide and why is he trying to gaslight her? Liars are hiding something. And no, it wouldn’t make any difference to my view that he let her look through his phone. In fact that would increase my suspicion.

So, he has showed OP his phone and allowed her to scroll through his accounts. She has been able to see that he hasn't posted on them for years. He simply doesn't want to add anyone new because he doesn't really use it and hasn't added anyone new since 2012.

I think @CopperWhite's summary is pretty accurate
You want him do something completely meaningless that he doesn’t want to and as he won’t do it you end your entire relationship. That sounds like hes had a lucky escape from being controlled and manipulated because you are refusing to listen to his explanation.

Bit strange to share bodily fluids for 3 years and not FB.

I dont have instergram but i do have FB only to read updates in my area.
My page is in a fake name my sister asked me to add her i said no i dont have friends on their i dont use it for that and i dont add people.
She was not happy with me and said i was hiding something.
Im not its just a fake fb profile that i read updates on and look at the migraine suffering page.
She still thinks im hiding something.
Still asking to add her i flat refuse each time.
Ive told her there is nothing on ther i dont post anything never have.
So i just let her carry on with her suspicions.

Did you read the bit where he allowed her to look through his phone?

Does that bring down the 100 at all?

Your reaction is quite strong... Do you think he's hiding something? The fact that your reaction was to get upset and ask him to leave, suggests that - in your gut - you suspect something's up.

My exh did this. He was having an affair with a 24 year old and didn’t want her to see his wife and kids.

Ditto. I use FB to find out what music events are coming up and to post the odd photo.
Most of my fb friends are people I don't have regular contact with - I don’t have any family on there and I never followed anyone I was dating, including my ex H of 25 years.

I don’t get what value there is adding close friends and family that you speak to regularly or a partner you are in constant contact with anyway. It all seems pointless and immature to me.

I don't post on any social media - Facebook, Insta ,X etc - but I do use them a bit, like your DP to check up stuff in the local area eg our residents association has a favebook page only.

I wouldn't want to connect with any friends or family on social media, as I don't want to have to follow and engage with them on those sites, we connect via whatsapp.

OP I think you're reading way too much into your DP not wanting to connect with you - it doesn't mean he has a secret life on social media, he just doesn't want to engage with it.

I was on Facebook for a few months years ago - I just couldn't stomach the false positivity. The demands for validation from some people was too much for me, and it was putting me off some friends, so I left. I have a very boring life, no secrets that I'm keeping from anyone!

@Ubspp to slot it sounds childish as social media is nothing but trouble .
However he clearly has something to hide .

Trust your gut he’s not trustworthy .
Id go as far as to say he’s had social media all along and you have just been blocked .

Same, I use social media to follow bands, events & organisations I'm interested in. I haven't connected with any family/friends & would feel the same about a partner.

I get where he was coming from I think. I still have Facebook and Instagram but haven't added new connections for years - now I use them for following local businesses and community updates etc. I've no interest in posting updates and not many friends seem to either. I guess if someone was having hissy fit about being added as a connection I would but would wonder why it was so important to them.

So he does have friends on there, but won’t add you? I’d also have a problem with this, even if he’s not doing anything untoward on there, what is it he’s holding against you to keep saying no? What difference does it make to him to add you? It’s just odd all round.

This could be resolved so easily by actually listening to what he has to say about it and making an effort to understand (not persuade!) how he feels about it. Then he has to do likewise.
You both sound so jumpy and defensive. Just LISTEN to each other without making assumptions and jumping to conclusions.

OP is being very tight lipped but I don’t think we are hearing the full story. Considering they have a child and don’t live together, I suspect this incident is more a symptom of a a wider problem than the whole story.

I think you’re taking this too seriously. I wouldn’t end a relationship over this, unless I had evidence that he’s up to no good. Honestly, this isn’t the end of the world. Just wait a couple of weeks and you’ll probably laugh at the very idea!

For what reason, though? You clearly had a conversation. Did he not give any justification other than ‘I don’t want to’? Even after you were clearly extremely upset?

If so, this whole situation is just really really odd. Social media aside, what’s communication like in your relationship? Clear, honest and respectful? Do you feel listened to and heard? Like you can have productive conversations?

As I said upthread I feel this incident is just one more thing that has made you distrust him.

Why do you not live together already if you have a child? Why aren’t you engaged or married?

I really think there’s more issues at play. Has there been suspected or actual infidelity in the past?

You have a child together and you’ve ended your relationship because he wouldn’t follow you on FB? This has to be a wind up surely?

Once again. I have hundreds of FB connections from when I used it between 2006-2018. Then I stopped using it because I wanted to minimise my usage of it. I do not use it to connect to new people or even to my old friends. I don't want to do anything active - commenting, liking, making new friends - any more. I want to be invisible and inactive. THAT is why I wouldn't connect to anyone new. Is it that hard to understand?

You have a child together??? And you broke up over this? Good lord.

That sounds reasonable to me? But I had to check whether I followed my DH on Instagram (I do) and on FB (I don’t). I don’t follow any of my siblings or most close friends. I’m not hiding anything, I just like to keep things very manageable.