To feel like I just never quite fit in?

I feel I've been faking it all my life but as I get older I realise that I do have some really good friends and the faking to fit i just dont do anymore. It is exhausting and I know it is a cliché but once you accept yourself you will attract others around you who you do fit with. You realise then its ok to see friends and not talk much or overshare everything dependent on the day and they love the you not the pretend you. As others have said you sound lovely o.p.
There's probably a certain sort of person who posts on mumsnet on a sat night so know you arent faking these interactions.

Embrace the weird! I'm not everyone's cup of tea, but I have friends, acquaintances who I'm happy to catch up with at a BBQ or over a beer.

Equally happy to be ignored or avoided by other people.

I also don't wear make up, have embraced the grey, dress simply but colourfully. Listen to Prodigy on my earbuds while I'm walking to work, smile at babies...

You're you and you're awesome!

I know exactly what you mean, forever on the periphery, no advice but solidarity. I just do my own thing and don't expect much from others.

I’ve never been part of a friendship group or “gone out with the girls”. It used to bother me as it felt like an expectation from my parents. They used to get all “concerned” although I was happy enough.

I’m now nearly 54 and am still happy enough. All my friends are individual and have no connection to each other.

It's OK to not fit in. I suspect lots of people don't, but are just better at faking it. Personally, i can't be arsed with doing that any more, it's too draining.

I think the moments of perfectly fitting in with another person or group are rare and valuable for all of us. The others you see are just trying and trying in search of these moments.

You sound like me. I'm a huge high achiever but also a complete mess. I also feel different and never fit in. Social interactions are draining. Look up AuAdhd women and I bet you'll spot a lot of traits in yourself. There are a lot of us!

You sound very much like me.

I really struggled with the whole school mum thing and I'm glad my DC are now in their late teens.

I'm actually getting worse now I'm in my 50's. I'm not a loner but just find it hard making polite chit chat. Way before I was diagnosed with inattentive ADHD earlier this year (I think I also have many autistic traits), I would say I have to put my 'mask' on before walking out my door and yes, I too find it utterly exhausting.

I never found an answer to it but can say that I've made peace with it now I'm 52. I'm happy with the few friends that I have, I have two lovely DC and DH and that has become enough for me right now. I'd much rather potter around a bookshop or garden centre on my own than make conversation with strangers tbh.

Me, but I also have possible adhd. Even within my own family I never felt like I quite fit. I seriously considered the possibility that I was adopted as a child, which was ridiculous me and my sisters are carbon copies of each other but they both seemed to find the social side of life so effortless while I felt like I was constantly putting on an act.

I used to feel like this a lot then somewhere in my late 30’s/early 40’s I just stopped giving a shit and was just myself - quirks and odd habits and whatever. I was just authentic and me. I found that people I liked, liked me, and people I didn’t care about, well, I didn’t care! It was so liberating, highly recommend. I spent so much time when I was younger trying to be like everyone else when it’s just so much easier to be yourself.

I have always felt like this, like an outsider, never quite fit in anywhere.

I was recently diagnosed with ADHD and Autism and it now kind of makes sense.

I do have friends but not a group of friends. Always struggle in the school playground with other parents and struggle to fit in at school.

Are you me?

I've long since accepted I'm just an introvert and maybe even on the spectrum somewhere. I'd honestly prefer a walk and a podcast, or a film with DH than needing to be "on" with friends all the time

Yes but I’m autistic.

You sound lovely op. I do know how you feel though. I’ve always felt a bit different, no matter how much I try to fit in. Most of my friends been the same.
I actually believe I’ve got adhd, which might explain it x