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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have called out my gardener

230 replies

Whenindoubthugitout · 04/10/2025 11:26

I have had a gardener this year. I have been really pleased and happy with the work he has done.

I asked him to reseed my lawn. Which he agreed to do.
The price he quoted was for 2.5 days work.

he reseeded it within a day, and I asked if the price would be reduced to reflect that it hasn’t taken him as long.

he said that - whilst it was reduced slightly - he would come out and water it daily for me whilst we were away, and that this was reflected in the pricing - which was fine.

we have been away all week, and he sent me a text this morning telling me I was due him the full amount.

however - I have a ring doorbell - and he hasn’t been out all week. (Tbf - it’s rained every day)

I called him out, and said I was unhappy to be paying for a job he hasn’t carried out.

he has now backtracked and said - oh yeah - but I plan to do three more trips (cynically I don’t believe him) and that he just didn’t want to bother me on holiday.

Aibu -to think he is trying it on -and the extra 3 trips are now because I called him out. And if he had initially intended to do these - he would have said so upfront……

I feel really sad. And let down
and slightly stupid for trusting someone to do something whilst I wasn’t there.

OP posts:
TwoBagsOfCompost · 04/10/2025 18:33

It's tricky OP. I had something similar and I think it was partly down to crossed wires and partly down to him trying it on. I paid the full price, but I (politely) made it clear that I was unhappy. They backpedalled immediately but the trust was gone so I insisted on paying full price and I silently said to myself I'm not booking them again.

Original poster
Whenindoubthugitout · 04/10/2025 18:32

You accused me of accepting work that wasn’t paid for?
really - where did I ever say that.
I have paid well, on time and for everything that has ever been done.

im not being sharp - I am being hurt.
I have paid the money
i have lost the gardener
i feel really flipping hurt by the whole bloody thing.

but I didn’t mean or intend to be sharp.

OP posts:
DiscoBob · 04/10/2025 18:31

Whenindoubthugitout · 04/10/2025 18:10

It’s over the odds - but he is a young guy with a young family -and we could afford to pay over the odds.

I am happy to pay over the odds:
but I am not happy to feel I have been taken advantage of.

I’m over it. (Well I am not - but I will get over it). i should just cut the flipping grass myself: but I am crap at it, and I am a firm believer in spending my money in the local economy.

Show quote history

That's totally fair enough.
I guess he didn't explicitly lie that he'd been round while you were away, but it was implied when he demanded full payment. I'm pretty sure he only said that about the planned visits when you questioned his absence.

Hopefully you can just offer him some more work and he won't get weird about you refusing paying for things that didn't happen. He should want to keep a decent client.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 04/10/2025 18:27

Whenindoubthugitout · 04/10/2025 18:24

lol ar some of the assumptions made

he has always been paid for all of his work.
he has never done work I haven’t asked for.

i paid £250 first thing this morning
and then said - do the last three visits and I will pay you the final £250.
but - he lied and said he had completed the job. Which he hadn’t.

i then posted here, and got my arse handed to me for a few hours.

so I paid the remaining money.

whether he now does the rest of the job is up to him:

But I would appreciate you getting the actual facts right.

Show quote history

Yikes. You are completely misinterpreting my tone. 😢
Your sharpness toward me is off mark.

Original poster
Whenindoubthugitout · 04/10/2025 18:24

Mumtobabyhavoc · 04/10/2025 18:04

I think it's also worth pointing out that the OP said the gardener often did work not within his scope which was appreciated. Had OP considered this then paying for the lawn as quoted may have been easier to swallow. Cutting ties amicably after that would have been less stressful if she felt it necessary.

Alternatively, OP could have been more matter of fact and asked when the three lawn follow-up visits will be scheduled after the rain and that she'd pay in full once done.

If OP gave the gardener a lecture that burnt bridges then lesson learned and find someone new. Next time pay for all "extra work" done, ie don't accept favours, and get everything in writing for bigger jobs laying out exactly what is to be done and cost.

lol ar some of the assumptions made

he has always been paid for all of his work.
he has never done work I haven’t asked for.

i paid £250 first thing this morning
and then said - do the last three visits and I will pay you the final £250.
but - he lied and said he had completed the job. Which he hadn’t.

i then posted here, and got my arse handed to me for a few hours.

so I paid the remaining money.

whether he now does the rest of the job is up to him:

But I would appreciate you getting the actual facts right.

OP posts:
Original poster
Whenindoubthugitout · 04/10/2025 18:10

DiscoBob · 04/10/2025 17:50

Our one charges £25 p/h. Which I think is the top end of what I'd pay. I guess it depends on the area?

Show quote history

It’s over the odds - but he is a young guy with a young family -and we could afford to pay over the odds.

I am happy to pay over the odds:
but I am not happy to feel I have been taken advantage of.

I’m over it. (Well I am not - but I will get over it). i should just cut the flipping grass myself: but I am crap at it, and I am a firm believer in spending my money in the local economy.

OP posts:
Mumtobabyhavoc · 04/10/2025 18:04

I think it's also worth pointing out that the OP said the gardener often did work not within his scope which was appreciated. Had OP considered this then paying for the lawn as quoted may have been easier to swallow. Cutting ties amicably after that would have been less stressful if she felt it necessary.

Alternatively, OP could have been more matter of fact and asked when the three lawn follow-up visits will be scheduled after the rain and that she'd pay in full once done.

If OP gave the gardener a lecture that burnt bridges then lesson learned and find someone new. Next time pay for all "extra work" done, ie don't accept favours, and get everything in writing for bigger jobs laying out exactly what is to be done and cost.

DiscoBob · 04/10/2025 17:50

ChocolateCinderToffee · 04/10/2025 14:13

£30 an hour? I pay the guy who does mine half that!

Our one charges £25 p/h. Which I think is the top end of what I'd pay. I guess it depends on the area?

canningqueen · 04/10/2025 17:15

For me, it wouldn’t be the money as much as he tried to backtrack/lie by omission (he didn’t admit until you called him out on it that he hadn’t done what you’d agreed). Silly bloke. It’s understandably affected the trust you had as it turns out he’d have taken the money whatever. He would have been better being upfront and keeping you as a valued customer. I’d not be able to get past the distrust now.

JMSA · 04/10/2025 17:04

He sounds like a chancer to me.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 04/10/2025 16:59

Boomer55 · 04/10/2025 16:54

It’s easy.

Either pay him for the job, or lose the gardener. 🙄

"lose the gardener"? Not much of a loss when he didn't actually do the last parts of the job anyway, that he cheeky fuckery invoiced OP for.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 04/10/2025 16:59

It's too late now as you've already paid him, but no way would I have paid him for the watering he didn't even do. He's a fucking chancer.

He didn't do the work extra, so wasn't owed the money. And for future guidance, never have people doing work on your property while you're not there.

Boomer55 · 04/10/2025 16:54

It’s easy.

Either pay him for the job, or lose the gardener. 🙄

PGBlush · 04/10/2025 16:52

Just pay him and then decide whether you want a new gardener. Good, reliable ones are not easy to find

Anjo2011 · 04/10/2025 16:50

I’d be a bit miffed as well, 1 day vs 2.5 is a big difference. Did he say why he over estimated how long it would take by so much?

Havetogooutagain · 04/10/2025 16:46

He was taking the piss OP.
I’d get another gardener now.
€500 is far too much for one day’s labour seeding a lawn.
MN is crazy sometimes.

rwalker · 04/10/2025 16:44

Problem is he thinks he’s priced for the job irrespective of of how long it takes and OP thinks she’s was given a price per hour

Hellohelga · 04/10/2025 16:40

I’d pay him then find another gardener.

nomas · 04/10/2025 16:33

What did the re-seeding involve? Did he have to dig up / soften the ground and add more soil?

Or was he just putting down seeds?

pinkbackground · 04/10/2025 16:31

My husband and I are gardeners. If we quote for a job which takes less than we thought then we only charge for the time it actually took.

DressOrSkirt · 04/10/2025 16:27

I'm not sure what you were expecting him to do - it seems like you either wanted him to go there and twiddle his thumbs while it rained, or to sacrifice pay he was expecting and probably relying on.
I think expecting either of those would be unreasonable.

Original poster
Whenindoubthugitout · 04/10/2025 16:26

I have already paid for all the materials
this was just the cost of carrying out the job
i have always paid by the hour

i am ducking out now, 80% say I am not unreasonable,
the 20% who think I am, i understand your view, I don’t necessarily agree with it,

OP posts:
Spookyspaghetti · 04/10/2025 16:24

I spent about two days reseeding our small lawn. Took nearly a months (watering twice a day) to take, there is a whole process over when and how to first cut it too. So I suppose it depends if you want someone to take care of your grass between now and the lawn looking any good 🤷‍♀️ Bit strange if he came and watered it in the rain. Presumably you have a very large garden if you need a gardener so the quote includes seed and equipment not just labour?

Manxexile · 04/10/2025 16:09

Whenindoubthugitout · 04/10/2025 14:41

The materials were paid for in July. He then said it was too hot to do - and we pushed the job to September at his request-

tbh - I will be crucified by both sides if I tell you how much I paid for machinery - top soil and grass seed.

Edited
Show quote history

OK.

But are you saying you paid for hire of machinery and purchase of top soil and grass seed on top of the £600 figure he gave?

Because if you are I'm more inclined to come round to the point of view that you've paid over the odds.

I had assumed that the £600 covered all associated costs - including his labour, hire of machinery and materials.

But if you are saying the £500 you eventually paid only covered a day's labour, that's a different matter.

Mydadsbirthday · 04/10/2025 16:07

I wouldn't pay - I think he's being disingenuous and I'm usually pretty generous / slack about this stuff.